


Plots and Voodoo

by spiralingintochaos (chaoticrandomness)



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: 2013 World Figure Skating Championships, 2014 European Figure Skating Championships, 2014 Trophée Éric Bompard, 2015 European Figure Skating Championships, 2015 Four Continents Figure Skating Championships, 2015 Russian National Figure Skating Championships, 2015 Winter Universiade, Crack, Gen, Voodoo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-15
Updated: 2016-04-10
Packaged: 2018-03-13 01:55:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 62,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3363422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaoticrandomness/pseuds/spiralingintochaos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Konstantin Menshov always seems like a nice, easygoing figure skater. Black magic definitely doesn't exist. Those are two statements that most people subscribe to in the world of figure skating. Little does anyone know that the rumors of such dark arts in the sport are true and that he, along with the rest of Team Rukavitsyn, are not without their dark sides. </p><p>(Or, the adventures of Evgeni Rukavitsyn's voodoo coven. Not to be taken seriously.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Right Thing

**Author's Note:**

> Please do not take this fic seriously. Written by invisiblespiral and Ava Moore of Goldenskate.

“Ksenia, could I talk to you for a second?” my coach asked me as I finished my spin. We’d spent the past few days working almost nonstop on my short program. Due to the relative weakness of both my flip and lutz, I was forced to perform a loop along with my triple toeloop-triple toeloop combination. It wasn’t an uncompetitive layout, but I knew it wouldn’t hold up against Adelina Sotnikova and Elizaveta Tuktamysheva, both of whom were performing triple-triples with lutzes and solo flips. Rukavitsyn and Averbukh were hoping that my non-jump elements would make up for the jumping gap, so the past few days were a nonstop frenzy of work on levels and choreography. It was tiring, but I knew that it was going to be worth it when I performed it perfectly.

 

“Sure. What do you want to talk to me about?” I answer, heading off of the ice and walking towards him. I always found it easy to talk to my coach, as he was so laid-back and understanding…on the outside, that was. If only I knew who he really was back then…

 

“Ksenia, is there anything you’re worried about,” he started to ask, turning to face me and looking into my eyes. “Like your competitiveness against Sotnikova and Tuktamysheva?”

 

“I… guess?” I answered tentatively, wondering how he could figure out my concerns so quickly, but it was probably a side-effect of coaching me and interacting with me almost daily…he practically knew me like an open book.

 

“I can see it in your eyes. You’re worried about keeping up with an onslaught of little girls, not just Sotnikova and Tuktamysheva, but Shelepen and Lipnitskaya and Radionova and their compatriots further down the pipeline….” he rambled, beginning to smile…a smile that was so uncharacteristic of him. I didn’t know that such a calm, kindhearted man could smile in such a cunning, scheming manner...or was it just me? I was trying to figure out why he was acting so oddly. Why did I find his smile so unsettling, and why did it seem like he could read my mind so accurately all of a sudden?

 

“Ksenia, have you heard rumors about Nikolai Morozov?” he asked, and all I could really think about Morozov and the rumors that surrounded him were all of those students of his that he’d developed feelings for. Who could forget his relationship with his favorite student, Miki Ando? I didn’t know what this had to do with my situation, unless he’d started expressing an interest in _me_ , despite coaching Alena Leonova, who was plenty charming herself, in an unconventional way, and closer to his age as well, being a couple of years older than I was.

 

“What do you mean? Are you planning on having him choreograph my free program?” I asked, trying to figure out exactly what Morozov had to do with my attempts at improving my levels and components and consistency…he wasn’t known for being a choreographer and coach who could help with that, and we’d already started discussing my free with Averbukh, so what else was there to discuss? I rubbed my bare arms, as I stood on the ice waiting for an explanation. My coach laughed lightly, though the look in his eyes remained the same.

 

“No, not about the trysts. Have you heard anything else about him?” Rukavitsyn asked, vaguely insistent, and I was trying to figure out how he knew exactly where my mind had gone on the topic of rumors surrounding Morozov, and all I could come up with was either Morozov’s reputation getting worse or mind-reading, but that didn’t exist…or so I thought.

 

“What do you want from me?! Why are you so intent on grilling me about this particular topic?” I exclaimed, stepping off the ice and taking a seat, taking down my blonde hair from the high ponytail I wore to practice. My coach had never acted this way, and him being so cryptic was getting on my nerves. I looked down, thinking for a while to try figuring out why my coach was acting so oddly…and he began to smile again.

 

“....there are people who believe that Morozov is capable of dark magic. Do you believe in magic, Ksenia?” he rambles, before presenting me with a question that felt extremely out of the blue. Who on earth asked that sort of question? Of course magic doesn’t exist….he was just lying, just messing with my head in an attempt to lighten the pressure of my current situation, because of course, magic didn’t really exist, and we were to to discuss my free program after this. Perhaps it had to do with a magic theme? But I remembered Alena’s free program last season. “Well, you have to, as Morozov is capable of a particular form of dark magic...thanks to me,” he continued, not giving me the chance to answer. I raised my eyebrow, before shaking my head.

 

“Yeah, right...no, I won’t believe you. What are you going to be telling me now? That Tatiana Tarasova knows dark magic?” He was kidding, he had to be.

 

“Ksenia, I’m not kidding, this is a serious matter. Voodoo magic does exist, and through it, I can help you succeed…” he replied insistently, grabbing me by the shoulder. He was a strong man, despite his age, and his grip hurt a lot, a far cry from his usual manner. All I want to do is leave, run away from this rink, for this can’t be real, _this cannot be real…._

 

“How?!” I exclaim, breaking free of his grip. My shoulder was sore, but I shook it off. I wanted an explanation from him. A real one, not one full of dodging and lies. I always thought that was someone I could confide with, and whom I could fully trust. But now…. I didn’t know what to think.

 

“It’s simple, really…you must just channel your power appropriately. Yes, I’ve seen some potential in you ever since I started coaching you, and now’s the time to hone it. You must unleash that power into a suitable proxy for your rivals here in Russia…like Adelina Dmitrievna and Elizaveta Sergeyevna. They’ll become nothing, nothing but destroyed stars who peaked too early…” he kept going on, his seemingly serene expression unchanging. I couldn’t believe what he was implying. No, he couldn’t be telling me all this...

 

“Why?! That’s a _terrible_ idea!” I exclaim, resisting my desire to punch him in the face, for who in their right state of mind could suggest that cursing fourteen year olds with dark magic was a valid and sane solution?! He must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed this morning or something like that…

 

“Ksenia, you _do_ want the Federation to remember you, right? With all this talent coming up the ranks, they’ll just discard you in a few years…. but if you let me teach you the art of voodoo magic, you’ll still be able to hold on and succeed. Trust me. I only want the best for my students, and it would be such a shame to see your talent go to waste once the Federation gets its new toys to play with,” he warned, sounding like a madman with his reasoning. And he was.

 

In a matter of a couple of minutes, my opinion of my coach, Evgeni Rukavitsyn, had completely changed. For the worse.

 

“Well, would you want me to teach you or not? Choose wisely, Ksenia…” he asked, staring into my eyes with his piercing, dark gaze. I wanted to run away, but it was as if his eyes were paralyzing me….what arts did this man know anyway? I did not want to imagine what he was capable of doing. If he wanted to know my choice, he was going to get an answer.

 

“No! I can make my way to Euros and Worlds on my own merits, and you’re suggesting I curse all of my opponents?! This is insane!” I exclaimed, before storming out of the rink. Right before I left, I felt a sharp pain in my leg, but ignored it.

 

Little did I know that in doing this, I’d set off a chain of events that would lead to my own downfall as a skater….

 

* * *

 

I didn’t realize it at the time, but my free program was the first nail in my coffin. I came back to the rink after a few hours of jogging and trying to clear my mind of the bad vibes that I had just encountered… and discovered that Rukavitsyn and Olga Glinka, his assistant, had somehow choreographed a new free program for me in that amount of time.

 

“Ksenia, do you think you look like Marilyn Monroe?” he asked, seemingly back to his normal self. I tried convincing myself that perhaps, I had hallucinated what I heard a few hours ago, that Rukavitsyn was the kindhearted father-like figure I’d always known him to be. But...I just couldn’t go back to how I’d previously seen him, no matter how much I tried…  

 

“I guess?” I replied tentatively, trying to figure out what was going on in his mind. This had to have something to do with the free program, but I didn’t understand what. Averbukh had already done a free program for me to Bel Suono’s _Megapolis_ just a couple of weeks ago, and we were supposed to start drilling it after I was solid with my short program.  

 

“Well, let’s see how you do as her in your free program….” he rambled, turning on some music. I was about to ask him what’d happened to Averbukh’s program, but maybe it just didn’t work or something. The music that started playing consisted of a strange mixture of cuts, and the program was equally strange and different from what I was used to… but I supposed that it was one of those that would grow on me.

 

I was wrong. Completely and utterly wrong.

 

* * *

 

Rukavitsyn had suggested that my fellow rinkmate Konstantin Menshov and I compete at Nebelhorn in order to test out our programs, and I’d agreed. While my short was solid, my free program was still a bit rough, owing to its odd choreography, and we still had some kinks to work out in it, as it was new. I would’ve prefered to have changed the program back to Averbukh’s _Megapolis_ , but it was too late to tell anyone about what I thought, as I already had run through the current program a number of times.

 

I was the final skater in the short program, but I didn’t feel nervous at all. I had prepared so well for this, and now was the time to show it off and claim the Nebelhorn trophy. As I took the ice, confidence was racing through my veins as my music started playing. I began to set up for my triple toe-triple toe combination, my confidence increasing as the music continued to play. I propelled myself into the first jump…only to fall for some reason. This wasn’t usual for me, as I usually nailed it…but maybe I didn’t have enough speed or something. Besides, it wasn’t too late to fix things; I could just add a double toeloop onto my triple loop.

 

I picked myself off of the ice, and began to set up for my triple loop…. only to pop it for some strange reason. This time, I knew that I didn’t err in any way going into the jump, and while the rest of my program was clean, the jump errors proved costly to my score. I hung my head as the music ended, disappointed in myself. What happened? What caused me to melt down?

 

A sharp pain erupted from my leg as I left the ice, causing me to almost collapse on the railing. Rukavitsyn’s strong arms caught me, and he helped me back. As we walked, I heard the numbers being announced. I scored only 45.95 points, going into sixth place. I shook my head, trying to hold back my tears. Pushing my coach’s hand away, I stumbled ahead, before the pain flared up once more and I fell down. I couldn’t pick myself off of the ground. It was like someone had paralyzed me…

 

_Why am I…so…dizzy?_

The last thing I remembered before I blacked out was a familiar voice calling an ambulance and apologizing…

 

* * *

 

I thought what happened in Nebelhorn could just be attributed to an off day. But I was completely and utterly wrong.

 

At every single other event this season, the same pattern emerged, the same things happened to me. I’d feel perfectly confident while executing my programs in practice, and even during full runthroughs, but I was never able to perform both my short and my free cleanly for some reason. I would make many mistakes on one or the other, or sometimes even both. It certainly wasn’t nerves, and it wasn’t errors I did not commit during rehearsals upon takeoff. It wasn’t stamina, as I did not feel fatigue during my programs at all, and Rukavitsyn was also clueless about what was going on.

 

Or so I thought.

 

I was looking for him a day after another one of my competitions. I didn’t even recall why I was, but the reason became unimportant when I noticed a little doll with blonde hair wearing a blue dress, and with numerous pins stuck in it lying around in his office. At first, I was thinking like every girl did, about how it was a shame that such a cute doll was being wasted as a pincushion… before I realized that the doll looked sort of like me, and the dress like my costume.

 

Impulsively, I walked towards his table and picked up the doll. Up close, it did look a lot like me…. and there was some stitching on the back. I turned it over…. and my name was stitched on its back in thick royal blue thread. It was partially covered with pins, but still legible. I knew how my own name looked like after all… and then I understood the cause of my errors.

 

It was Rukavitsyn.

 

Out of anger towards my refusal to join him in his pursuit of the dark arts, he’d cursed me instead. Perhaps he was hoping to break me into joining him, but I was stronger than that. A lot stronger. No matter what was going to happen to my results, I wasn’t going to join him.

 

* * *

 

_“You don’t want to end up like Makarova, don’t you, Masha?”_

In terms of results? Then yes, I agreed with him. In terms of personality and morals, on the other hand…don’t think of giving in. No matter what, always do the right thing.

 

_Maria, do you understand?_

 

 


	2. Dark Heart

_It should’ve been me. I should’ve gone._

I turned my bronze medal over as I repeated the words in my mind. No, I wasn’t going to tell them that. From the results of Nationals, it looked like the Federation would send me to Europeans and Worlds. I, Konstantin Alexandrovich Menshov, had this medal to prove it after all. Unfortunately for me, they didn’t. They chose Maxim, who failed to even medal. I don’t know why they turned to Maxim so quickly...Maxim who wasn’t on the podium, and who couldn’t even be relied on. I did all I could, landed those quadruple jumps, and that’s how they treat me? Dropping the medal, I buried my hair into my hands in frustration.

 

“Kostya, are you alright?” my coach asked, somehow reading my mind. Evgeni Rukavitsyn has always been good at that, for whatever reason. His kind eyes met mine as I looked up at his familiar, comforting face. I was about to answer him when he cut me off gently.

 

“I know that you believe that you should be in Maxim’s place. Wouldn’t anyone in your situation think so? I do, after all. And of course, anyone in your situation would be subconsciously willing him to fail in his endeavors, right? Make the Federation regret their decision and wish that they had sent you instead?” he started asking, and I tried to figure out how he knew all this, as if he could read my mind. Now, I have been under him for many years, so he probably knew me like an open book. Still, for him to know what I was thinking...

 

“....I guess?” I answered, trying to figure out why he was acting a lot differently from his usual laid-back self. “I mean, Maxim didn’t even medal!”

 

“Don’t you start getting soft. You’re a man, and men don’t whine. There’s always a choice, Kostya, and I’m here to show you that. You desire revenge…. and I can help you with that. I’ve watched you progress for years, and I can tell you that you have the potential to take control of situations. It’s just that you need to learn how to channel and harness this.”  Zhenya scolded me uncharacteristically, before he started to ramble about some “potential” I had. What he was talking about, I did not understand, but he did not give me a chance to ask. “Fortunately, you have certain talents that allow you to harness this. Remember the octopus alien you sewed and added to your short program costume last year? Yes, fabric dolls should work nicely...” he continued, still not making any sense at all. I scratched my head, looking at him as I opened my mouth.

 

“What dolls? What are you talking about?!” I asked, determined to get an explanation for his odd behavior. My coach simply smiled and stood up from his seat, beckoning for me to do the same. I get up and followed him out of the kiss-and-cry.

 

“Kostya, do you want me to help you or not?” he responded, dropping his voice. An unsettling smile crept on his face. I looked at him, thinking about what I was possibly getting myself into, before I nod. Knowing him, he probably wasn’t going to resort to something as extreme as making me hire an assassin.

 

“Tell me, what are the rumors you heard about Nikolai Alexandrovich Morozov?” he asked, the question seemingly simple. Now, most people knew that Morozov wasn’t exactly a man known for his integrity, and it wasn’t uncommon to hear talk about him possessing supposed dark powers that he used to his advantage. Many attributed odd results to Morozov’s alleged powers, but I wasn’t about to believe that so easily.

 

“That he has...magic?” I started, dropping my voice down to a whisper as I began scratching my head again. Something told me that this was a topic that my coach did not want out in the open, judging from how he acted while leading me out.

 

“And remember how young Kolya is? Now do the math, smart boy,” he prompted, his dark eyes suddenly more intense in its gaze, as if he were staring into my very soul. I held it, before realizing what he meant. _No, it couldn’t be_ , I thought...it was impossible. Were the rumors true? Was I facing someone who had magic? God, Evgeni Rukavitsyn had to be Morozov’s teacher, from what he was implying!

 

“You were his master?! Magic exists?!” I exclaimed in a harsh whisper, trying my best not to be heard. The last thing I wanted was to be sent to a mental institution, or get arrested. My mentor grinned proudly as he nodded.

 

“Not just plain old magic, Kostya. It’s a force that you can harness to help you, if you have the right technique. Now, do you want me to help you?” he revealed, his voice still oddly calm, as if saying these things came naturally to him, which I never expected...until now. What other secrets was he keeping from me? Never in my life did I expect him, of all coaches, to turn out being a master of dark magic. Whether he was telling the truth or not, I was going to find out. First, I was going to see if it indeed worked. After all, I had nothing to lose at this point. I looked up at him, meeting his look.

 

“Yes. I want you to help me, coach.” I said, my voice bearing a tone of surrender. If the Federation wasn’t going to turn back on their decision, it was about time that I take my chances, especially because this was the last thing I could do as of the moment.

 

“Very good. Now, before I start teaching you, you must first gather a few things…I did mention that this force needs harnessing. This wouldn’t be too difficult for you, Kostya.” Rukavitsyn answered, placing an arm around my shoulder as he led me out of the building, into the cold December night, as he continued to instruct me, keeping his voice discreet. I hung on to every word he said, determined to see for myself what tomorrow would bring with this new development.

 

 


	3. Thorns of Death

The newly-finished doll sat on the coffee table of my apartment. It had short brown hair, was wearing an all-black, one-piece costume with sheer cutouts and sparkles. The name ‘Kovtun’ was stitched onto the back of its head. This time, I was careful enough to cover it with the hair I added, rather than stitch the name on the back of his shirt, as was my mistake a few months ago which my coach pointed out. Subtlety is the key, my mentor advised after I made my first set of dolls. I scooped it up and kicked back on my couch, my eyes fully trained on the screen.

 

In about half an hour, Maxim Kovtun will be skating his short program at the World Championships. In about half an hour, I will channel my newfound power into these pins and make Maxim wish that he never set foot on that ice, wish that he was never chosen for Worlds. I grinned to myself, confident that I would, in fact, succeed. Rukavitsyn’s lessons were unconventional and intense, and he proved to be a strict instructor, far different from his gentle, encouraging demeanor on the ice.

 

_I should be there. I should be the person they sent to London to get us our men’s spots for next year._

There was a part of me that was telling me that I was being irrational. If Kovtun were to finish eleventh or lower, we’d end up with only one spot, which has an incredibly low chance of going to me next year due to both him and Zhenya both being high in the Federation’s favor… but if he were to finish above that, there’d also be no chance of me going for that exact same reason. I wasn’t going to allow the Federation to have the last laugh over me, just because they felt that younger equalled better save for Zhenya. Maxim Kovtun cannot win the world championships this year, and I, Konstantin Alexandrovich Menshov, would make sure of that.

 

The pins are lying in an open canister by the doll; they were special pins purchased by my mentor. Longer and sharper than average, and capped with black heads, he warned me never to use them for any other purpose. I take one out and felt its sharp tip with my finger, then stuck my tongue on top of it to lick it a bit, feeling a slight, sharp pain as I did. Twenty minutes until he takes the ice, and I still thought that it should have been me skating in London. I should have been the man who was going to earn Russia at least two spots for Sochi, yet….

 

Should I even be doing this? Should I have accepted my coach’s offer, and jumped down the rabbit hole? Should I have spent the past three months keeping secrets from my Masha? Should I have just told him that I wouldn’t turn to the dark arts and just file a petition to the Federation? However, I snapped myself out of my doubting thoughts. A real man wasn’t going to whine and complain. A real man was going to find a way, no matter what, and I’ve gone too far into the darkness to emerge from it. I am a real man, and I’d given in too far to my insatiable desire for revenge….

 

Ten minutes before Maxim takes to the ice, ten minutes until he will err in his short, and I felt the darkness grow within me. I open the canister of pins and pour them onto the table, and they scatter like fallen dominoes, the metal clinking softly against the glass. My heart started pounding. I couldn’t do this, and I shouldn’t do this. I was about to jump off a dangerous cliff, and do something horribly wrong…. but there was no way for me to turn back at this point. Everything was in place, right in front of me. I had already sewed the doll… and Maxim’s wasn’t the only one I had. There were more, all hidden in my closet, away from prying eyes. I unbuttoned my gray, short-sleeved shirt as I felt myself grow hot from the tension I was feeling, growing stronger with each passing minute.

 

Five minutes until Maxim’s short, and my phone rang. Most likely, it was either Masha or Rukavitsyn calling me, but I did not want to hear from them just yet. I did not want to talk to anyone just yet. Looking at the time, I got up and padded towards the kitchen in my bare feet, making my way to the fridge and taking out a bottle of vodka and a small glass, pouring myself a shot to calm my nerves before heading back. Three and a half minutes remained, and somehow, I found myself considering the possibility of harming him at once and prompting a withdrawal. I picked up the doll, as well as a bunch of pins.

 

_No, I’m not going to force him to withdraw. Just wait another few minutes before you stab him…._

Three minutes. Two minutes. One minute…. and Kovtun takes to the ice, but it should be me, I should have been the one skating out there...

 

_Well, just stab the doll and stop wallowing in your self-pity!_

I grab one pin and slam it into the doll’s chest. And another. And another. I kept grabbing pins and slamming them one by one into the doll, until all of my work is destroyed in three minutes.

 

_Do you regret this? Do you regret what you’ve done?_

I could not answer the question ringing in my head. Did I regret cursing Maxim Kovtun into bombing his skate or not? Whatever my answer was, I could not think about it too well, as I began to feel lightheaded, just as my coach warned me. Exhaustion flowed through my veins as I collapsed onto the sofa, drained of all energy.

 

I woke up to Rukavitsyn telling me that Kovtun popped his quadruple toe-triple toe combo into a triple toe-single toe and got an unusual level 2 on one of his spins. He ended up scoring 65.85 points, and stood in 19th place.

 

_It worked beautifully._

* * *

 

I was tired, yet my job was not yet complete. There was still the free skate to deal with, and this was even more crucial to my agenda. There was no backing out now, Maxim was 19th the other day, and everything was going too well for me to quit. Rukavitsyn, crazy as he sounded at first, was truly a genius and a man of many hidden talents. I wasn’t about to fail him, or myself for that matter. I took a last sip of my cold energy drink, something my mentor prescribed to keep my power level stable for the duration of the free skate, and put the bottle away, leaning forward towards the television. Because of my work, Maxim was forced to skate second.

 

_Great job, Kostya, great job indeed. I wasn’t wrong in offering you the opportunity._

These were the words of praise my mentor had for me when I woke up hours after the disaster of Maxim’s short program. Frankly, they meant a lot to me, as I was often pushed aside by the federation due to my age, and often dismissed as merely “good”. To hear “great” was another thing entirely, and it gave me the feeling of wanting more. I wanted to have the last laugh, and it was going to take another great job for me to accomplish my agenda: to keep Maxim out of the top ten in Worlds.

 

Justus Strid had just left the ice, and I allowed myself to focus on what I had to do. I had to last the entire four and a half minutes in order to carry out the task. Two days ago, I passed out after two minutes and thirty seconds of constant pinning, as men took more energy to curse than women after all. This time, I needed to channel more of my powers and had to concentrate. Rather than move around, I immediately took the doll and my pins once more and allowed my mind to concentrate on what was in front of me. It was a matter of time before Strid’s score popped up, and Maxim once again skated to the center of the rink.

 

_Everything’s in your hands now._

Maxim started to glide, and for a few minutes, I forgot about sticking the pins in. I was still trying to gather up as much energy as I could after all. That proved to almost be my undoing, as he somehow landed a quadruple toe-double toe combo, another quadruple toe, and a triple lutz-triple toe combo. The third jump snapped me out of my thoughts, and finally looked up at the technical score box, horrified to see how high the numbers were at this point.

 

_No, it cannot end this way. He will not get into that top 10, if it’s the last thing I’ll do._

Taking three pins, I stabbed them hard against the doll’s chest, feeling energy flowing through my fingers. Maxim jumped, attempting a triple toe-triple toe, but ended up doubling the second jump. I wasted no time and stuck a few more pins, digging deeper as I did, keeping my eyes trained on the television screen. He made a mistake on his triple axel, then fell on his triple flip. I smiled calmly as I leaned back. I was growing tired, but I knew that I had to keep going. The next pins I stuck were all on his legs. As if in response to the energy I transferred into the doll, he popped both his last jumps, doubling his planned triple salchow and finally, singling a triple axel, which proved to be his costliest mistake. I tried to suppress a cheer as he finished his program, clearly looking pissed at himself. I dropped the doll, my head feeling light once more. I had to work on getting stronger for the time being. Before I found myself collapsing from tiredness, I pushed myself up and stumbled back to my room, flopping down on my bed and curling up, a satisfied smile on my face.

 

_Bravo, Maxim. Bravo, Federation. Hope you give yourself pats on your backs for your intelligence and your foresight._

 

 


	4. Fallen Angel

_“You don’t want to end up like Makarova, don’t you, Masha?”_

My coach’s gentle warning rang clear in my ears. At first, I thought he was only talking about my results, which were good by most standards but were a different story in Russia, and how he didn’t want them to decline like hers. Little did I know that I was naive at that time, that he wasn’t telling the whole truth.

 

No, he wasn’t talking about Ksenia’s results at all. It all centered around what he could’ve done to her…. what both he and Kostya had the capabilities to do to her, had done to her with those dolls after the heartbreaking announcement of the Europeans Men’s team…

 

And I was unlucky enough to discover this all completely by accident. Sometimes, I wish I never found out to begin with. It all started a week ago, when I made a decision that I now regretted. It seemed so simple at that time, as I merely wanted to borrow one of Kostya’s smaller shirts to lounge around in. I was unfortunately met with a terrible surprise when I opened up Kostya’s closet. An avalanche of what looked like miniature, hand-sewn dolls came tumbling out to greet me. I just thought this was another one of his quirks, like his driving speeds, and his surprising skill at sewing, but something about all of these dolls felt off. Ever since I started dating him, I never knew of him having a hobby relating to dolls, nor had I ever seen him showing an interest in them. I picked one up, noticing its soft, blonde hair and an outfit that definitely looked familiar to my eyes. I looked at it a little more closely, before realizing that they were all dolls of our teammates. Not only did they look pretty close to the real ones, but once I turned them over, I saw that they also had their names stitched on. Half of the dolls even had pins stuck into them.

 

_Shelepen…. Korobeynikova…. Makarova…. Kovtun…. why are they all of people who…._

“Masha, are you ready yet?” Kostya exclaimed, calling out from the living room. I grabbed a random shirt and several of the dolls, before shutting his closet and heading out of the room. Part of me wanted to believe, back then, that it was just a coincidence that the ones with pins in them were of people who’d had bad seasons or performed poorly at Nationals, and that he wasn’t doing anything suspicious…. but I was wrong about my love. Completely wrong.

 

“Why do you have dolls of all of our teammates in your closet?!” I exclaimed, placing the dolls of Korobeynikova and Makarova on the coffee table for him to see. I glared at him, my mouth set in a grim line as I waited for him to explain himself. From my years of knowing him, I knew that he was always a terrible liar when cornered.

 

“It’s just a hobby of mine. Do you want me to make one of you? I don’t think I could do justice to your beauty though, Masha,” he answered, shrugging as he picked up Makarova’s doll and bounced it on his palm absentmindedly, refusing to meet my eyes. This was so unlike Kostya. Sweet, earnest Kostya who never avoided my eyes that way.

 

“Why are you using half of them as pincushions? Why are the pins in the ones with bad seasons? Why do you have dolls of almost every single person on the national team? Why does it look like you’re hiding them from me?” I demanded, my voice raising after every question. I wanted to believe him, wanted to think that I was overreacting…. but I couldn’t find it in myself to.

 

Especially because he had one of Maxim Kovtun, who just happened to place seventeenth in Worlds two months ago. Kovtun, whom most blamed for failing to secure our country with at least two spots in the upcoming Olympics. Now, I knew he wasn’t the most consistent skater, Kostya was a lot more dependable and even now, I still believed that he should have been chosen. But seventeenth was just way too out there.

 

“Masha, calm down. I-” he began, before I pulled Maxim’s doll out of the pocket of my shorts. His eyes suddenly widened, and he began to stare at the floor. It was as if he felt guilty over something. Never had I seen Kostya act in such a way, especially to me.

 

_Like…. oh god, please let this be a lie…._

“You did that to him, didn’t you? As revenge for your snub at Euros and Worlds, you somehow managed to force him to bomb using this...this doll. What kind of grown man even plays with dolls?!” I spat, my hands shaking as I tossed the doll to him, trying to control myself. The words sounded like complete nonsense, but there was a part of me that thought that it was more than just a coincidence that a string of bad things had happened to Maxim after Nationals, even if I didn’t want to believe it.

 

_But why does he have dolls of…. my…. competitors…._

“Masha….” he began, still staring at the floor. It wasn’t only Maxim. Bad things followed those whose dolls had pins stuck into them, and if Kostya thought I wouldn’t remember, he was sorely wrong about that.

 

“So you, somehow, were responsible for Shelepen’s move to Israel, Korobeynikova’s state this year, and Makarova….” I began, enumerating all that I remembered from the past five months, before remembering my coach’s words once more.

 

_“You don’t want to end up like Makarova, don’t you, Masha?”_

“I just wanted to help you….” Kostya pleaded as I ran out the door, still holding his shirt and some of the dolls, my mind still trying to comprehend what I had just caught myself into. Never in my life had I faced something this odd, something this wrong.

 

I’d just realized that there was something wrong, terribly wrong with my boyfriend, and that he was a practitioner of some sort of dark art that I thought only existed in movies and in fairy tales. And I had to tell someone.

 

* * *

 

“Masha, is everything alright?” Evgeni Rukavitsyn asked me the next day before I stepped onto the ice. I wondered how he was able to discern my mood so quickly, but he’d been my coach for several years and probably knew me like the back of his hand by now. I opened my mouth, about to tell him about the dolls I found in Kostya’s closet, before he interrupted me.

 

“You aren’t bringing your relationship issues to the rink, are you?” he asked, playfully teasing me, his mouth still curled into its usual good-natured smile. It was as if he could read my mind, but I dismissed that as nonsense. Psychic powers and psychology were two different things after all, and Rukavitsyn was just probably good at reading expressions and body language.

 

_Well, not exactly…. but I just found out about Kostya’s dolls and how he can will people into making mistakes. I don’t know how the hell he got into this mess and learned these things, but someone has to get him out before he does-_

“....power increases in proximity of those who share bonds….” he murmured, seemingly making no sense at all, as I stepped onto the ice. This was so unlike my coach. I never heard him speak in such a distant, odd manner, unless...no, I couldn’t believe that. Rukavitsyn couldn’t be the man behind Kostya’s suspicious doll collection, he couldn’t have been the one who told him about all this, I mean, he was always friendly and approachable. But this? This wasn’t like him at all, unless there was a side to him that I didn’t know of, and was about to discover.

 

“Masha, you wouldn’t want to end up like Makarova, right?” he asked once again, before tossing a small object to me. I skated backwards, catching it. I looked down at my hands and saw that it was a small, blue-eyed doll wearing a white dress with its long, blonde hair in a ponytail. Curious, and remembering Kostya’s dolls, I turned it over.

 

_Artemieva._

“I mean, we’ll never use it, but…. just in case.” he said in his usual good-natured tone as all of the pieces fell into place in my mind. Wordlessly, I gave the doll back and skated away, trying to take my mind off what I had just found out.

 

 


	5. Diamond In The Rough

Zhenya Rukavitsyn had given me some inside information about a possible third member, whom we needed sorely at this point. Masha has not yet forgiven me fully, and she only consented to learning the art if only to watch out for me and keep me in check. Still, I must admit that my powers worked to my advantage to some extent. While Zhenya Plushenko had been chosen to represent our country for the Olympics, at least it wasn’t Maxim who had been chosen in the end, despite me not being able to work my magic at the last Nationals. Thanks to the magic however, I managed to earn a bronze medal this time around, while Maxim ended up with less than a potato (thanks Michal). Now, there was the matter of Sergei Voronov placing above me, but he could be dealt with at a later time.

 

 _Focus!_  I thought, as I looked towards the rink from my front-row seat, towards the matter at hand. Said matter took the form of a petite, yet strongly-built dark-haired young woman skating to the center of the ice. She wore a black and red outfit, with a rose pinned in her black hair. Alena Igorevna Leonova was no Masha, but there was something behind her striking, wolf-like gray eyes that was intrigued by, and _liked_. Her _power_. Raw, untapped, and a lot of it. I daresay it far exceeded mine even at this point. I looked down towards the rails of the rink and noticed a dark-haired man watching.

 

_How could I forget? Morozov’s her coach! He was Zhenya’s best student!_

I was not going to let a golden opportunity like this slip from my grasp. Alena would be a valuable asset to any practitioner, and she wasn’t going to slip away. First though, I was going to have to deal with Morozov in my own way. I kept my eyes on the dark-haired witch as a passionate Latin beat started playing, and she started moving. Zhenya had taught me to use my eyes for this task, never letting them leave her if I wanted to plant the seed into her mind. I knew her for some time, but only now did I realize that such untapped power lay within the energetic, theatrical yet rather moody tomboy whom I’ve always seen and sometimes talked to. Then again, I never looked upon her with my powers like I did now.

 

The music kept playing, as she jumped and spinned. Alena was a very good skater and performer, though the previous season had not been kind to her. I wondered whether this was a product of her own issues, or Morozov’s. After all, she was good enough to medal at worlds two years ago, and was definitely good enough to skate at Worlds. From what I’ve noticed about the Federation however, they did _not_ like the girl skating in front of me, and it looked like she knew it. She was selected, yes, but Zhenya’s training allowed me to see past her facade and into her troubled mind. She thought that the Federation was forced to choose her to compete, and that she wasn’t going to be heading to Worlds, no matter how high she placed, despite many others from other countries, placing lower than her, being able to go.

 

_In a way, she’s just like me. Another victim of the Federation’s focus on the young and up-and-coming. She will come to us, it’s only a matter of time._

She finished her free skate, riddled with a number of errors that made her total score take a hit, her eyes glistening as she tried to hold back tears, and Morozov helping her back to the kiss-and-cry. After a few minutes, her score was announced: 178.15, very good by most standards, but not so much in Russia. It’s a score Masha would dream of having internationally, and still, Alena knew that it wasn’t enough, and that she wasn’t going to the Olympics unless someone royally messed up or got injured. 

 

* * *

 

Alena ended up in fourth place overall, missing out on the podium, while Julia Lipnitskaya and Adelina Sotnikova managed to obtain gold and silver medals, respectively. I eyed the youngsters during the medal ceremony, before getting up from my seat and heading for the exit. I wasn’t going to watch this madness, a shining example of the Federation’s nurturing. No, I was going to find my new discovery, before I missed her. If they weren’t going to appreciate the diamond in the rough that they had, it was up to me to make sure she wouldn’t be wasted. Such power couldn’t be overlooked...and she was every bit as good as Masha in terms of her skating skills.

 

_Think about it, she’d be desperate to have a chance to compete and medal. Especially when more youngsters enter the scene, and she’d be pushed aside further. Capitalize on the opportunity!_

The cold midwinter night air hit my face as I stepped out of the sports center, wrapped warmly in my thick parka, as well as a blue scarf and matching beanie that Masha got for me. Several people stood outside, evidently spectators who had left early like me. Leaning against the wall of the stadium however, was a familiar sight. Alena had traded her black and red skating costume for a black army jacket, comfortable jeans and tall black boots, her long dark hair curly from being let down from its bun. She was drinking from what looked like a cup of hot chocolate, but as I approached her, caught the faint scent of alcohol. Spiked chocolate, undoubtedly a sign that she was upset and trying her best to get over it. Zhenya did give me information about her habits and preferences, and I did not miss the memo that she enjoyed alcohol.

 

“Hey, Alenka…” I started. She looked at me with her large, pale-colored eyes, her mouth opening slightly, as if to ask why I had approached her, before I cut her off to say what I wanted and had to say.

 

“You were great today, don’t let anyone let you think otherwise.” I continued, squeezing her shoulder. Despite being rather small, she did not have to look up in order to see my face, as only two and a half inches separated the two of us. She smiled, her eyes still sad, as she nodded.

 

“Thanks, Kostya...I really appreciate that someone enjoyed it. Unfortunately, the ones who matter are the ones who think otherwise. I don’t want to stop, but it’s as if they want me to. I’m not stupid, they’re just predictable. For them, I’m practically ancient,” she replied her tone first warm and appreciative, but turning desperate as she brought up the Federation. She looked away, blinking back a few tears as I placed both my hands on her shoulders, looking into her eyes.

 

“And we won’t let them, Alenka. Perhaps Morozov has grown dull and lost mastery in playing the game? So many possibilities... I’ll be seeing you again very soon...and I look forward to that day.” I told her, smiling gently as I effectively planted the last cue into her mind. I had to earn her trust for this to fully work.

 

“I don’t know for sure, Kostya. Morozov is in a powerful position after all, and I don’t read minds. I don’t know what goes on in his head, and he’s been very kind to me...so what else could I do,” she expressed, doubt evident in her tone. I took her free hand, feeling its coldness though it was clad in black leather, as I leaned closer. I had to drop a small hint for her, enough for her to make her start thinking.

 

“Be brave, Alenka. Be brave.” I advised in a low tone, my breath fogging in front of me due to the frigid temperature. Dropping her hand, I turned away, winking at her and giving her a thumbs-up before I left, seeing her eyes light up in response. Oh, this was going to work out somehow, alright.

 

All that I needed was time.

 

 


	6. Point Of No Return

“I said I’m not going with you, Kolya.” I repeated for the second time, crossing my arms as I leaned against the wall of his apartment. Nikolai Morozov sat on his couch, leaning forward as he looked at me, his eyes pleading and upset at the same time. I wasn’t about to fall for them any longer. Despite his allegedly important position in the eyes of the Federation, what more could he do for me? He did nothing to help me get into the Olympics, and he didn’t fight for the Worlds spot that was unfairly taken away from me, just because of some goddamn local tournament. Kostya _was_ right. Kolya _had_ to be losing his mojo, and I wasn’t going to live with that. It was about time I took action and used my head.

 

“Alenka, I don’t get it. I’ve been your coach for years, and for the past three months, you’ve been more on the edge than usual. I don’t get why you’re so against moving to America to train with me. You’ll be my star now. Is there something that you want to tell me?” the handsome older man asked, burying his face and hair into his hands before looking up at me once more, his face flustered and slightly red. No, I wasn’t going to give in. I know it wasn’t me, so it had to be him who wasn’t working out, and I wasn’t going to sit around and allow things to go down for me. I’m a fighter, not some giggly loser, and this was the test I had to go through, if it meant continuing to compete, to keep seeing Seryozha, who at least was given chances...

 

_Be brave, Alenka. Be brave._

“I am not moving to America, Kolya, can’t you respect that I have my reasons for staying? Besides...your star _now_? I guess that meant that I was never your priority to begin with, and just because you only have me now, you chose to state the obvious. Speaks a whole lot about your damn character, man! I’ve had enough with your sleeping around, your behavior, and your neglect!” I replied, my voice increasing in volume as I spoke, growing angrier as I realized that what I was saying was how I felt for the past two years, after I won my silver Worlds medal. I worked my ass off, yet he focused most of his attention on one half of his best ice dance team - Elena Ilinykh, who was twenty years younger than him. Disgusting, but true, and I couldn’t pretend to ignore what I saw. He used his position of power over her, and was the most likely cause of the breakup of the pair. How much longer until he tried to take advantage of me? Could he harm me in terms of my skating and my reputation if I refused?

 

“Say no more. I’m through with you, Nikolai Alexandrovich Morozov, and don’t you try calling me an ingrate!” I continued, angry tears running down my cheeks. I didn’t want to cry, I was twenty-three after all, but I wasn’t very good at hiding it unfortunately.

 

“Of course you’re an ingrate! Why deny it? Remember that it was I who helped you obtain that silver medal! Do you think Alla Yakovlevna solely had a hand in it? You are nothing without me Alena Igorevna, and you better remember that.” he roared back, pointing at me as he emphasized on his last sentence. I wiped my tears before glaring at him, slowly stalking towards his door. Now wasn’t the time to run back to him. It was now or never.

 

“Wouldn’t you be partially responsible for the season after that, then? Don’t take me for a fool or a weakling,  it’s not going to change my mind.” I continued, flinging the door open before looking back at him one last time, with the most hateful look I could ever muster, if it even looked remotely convincing. Too many people joked that I couldn’t glare for my life, and that they’d always somehow see a smile behind every look I tried to pull. Well, I didn’t feel like smiling this time around, or saying anything more for that matter. I stepped out and slammed the door of his apartment, walking briskly towards the elevator and stepping in, wishing that it could go down faster as I pulled on my jacket.

 

_Where do I go from here? I would never see Seryozha again, aside from competitions, if I leave… but staying here in Moscow with that pig is out of the question! Oh, Seryozha…_

I wiped the tears that had fallen with my fingers as I stepped out of the elevator, avoiding eye contact with anyone. What I appreciated about the city, what made my training bearable as Kolya ignored me, was the fact that Seryozha was so very near. I’ve always had a thing for him that I didn’t want to admit. We started training under Kolya at the same time, and I quickly fell for him, though I tried so hard not to make it too obvious, as I wasn’t many guys’ “type” after all, and he probably had someone on his mind... he was very handsome and nice after all. Even though he left Kolya last year without giving much reason, he stayed in Moscow, and I still saw him and his charming smile from time to time. It was the possibility of seeing Seryozha that kept me going, but this time…I had to take care of myself. I had to be brave, as brave as I am on the ice, as both skater and actress.

 

_I’ll see him again, and that’s what matters. It’s not as if he will ever think of me as anything more anyway._

I was leaving, that was for sure. All I had to do was tell Alla Yakovlevna about it. She would understand, as I’ve trained under her for many years. For now, I had to play the game right. I would not be forced out by the Federation if it was the last thing I’d do. Humming a tune from Phantom of the Opera, I thought about what to do next. I then remembered my conversation with Kostya Menshov last January, I recalled that he told me that we’d be meeting very soon. How he somehow knew that I would be in this bind, I did not know, but it did not matter now. St. Petersburg was far enough for me, and was home. I took out my phone and dialled Kostya’s number.

 

“Hello?” a voice asked from the other side. A familiar voice that only belonged to one person, the one I wanted to talk to at this time.

 

“Kostya, it’s me, Alena Igorevna… I’ll be seeing you soon.” I said, first tentatively then more confidently, beginning to smile.

 

 


	7. Stranger Than You Dreamt It

I sat in front of my new coach Evgeni Vladimirovich, waiting for him to look up from whatever it was he was reading. I didn’t know why he had called me to his office today, when I had just arrived the night before. Surely he couldn’t have somehow come up with my programs already? I didn’t know anyone who could work that quickly.

 

“Ah, there you are, Alena,” he exclaimed as he looked up from his papers, smiling gently at me. I liked this man already. He was so unlike Kolya Morozov, that I felt as if I made the right choice. When I arrived, he accompanied my parents in picking me up, something so odd, as I didn’t know how he got ahold of my parents’ details, considering that Kostya was our only bridge before I arrived. He brought along Kostya and another one of his students as well, and helping me settle back in. He even took me out for dinner and drinks with them, and I quickly made friends with them. Kostya was so charming and funny, and had a thing for nice cars and driving really fast…not that he’s seen me drive yet. Maria Eduardovna was so beautiful and strong-willed, yet so sweet and caring. I had the feeling that I would enjoy being around Kostya more, as well as having Masha and my new coach around from the get-go. So far, it seemed as if I made the right choice to move…now, if only I didn’t feel so bad about not being able to see Sergei. “So, how are you liking things so far? I assume that you like the fact that you’re back home?”

 

_Wait… he’s never met me. How’d he know that I was from here? Did he… read my mind? Did he ahold of some dirt about me?_

“Hey, as long as I’m out of his sight, I can say that I’m happy. How’d you know I’m from here, anyway?” I asked, wondering how on earth he knew to begin with. It was so odd, considering how he managed to find my parents, both of whom I was sure had never met him or Kostya prior. He smiled once again, and held up a sheet of paper.

 

“The Federation’s data on you. Don’t you remember? Why, you thought that I somehow read your mind? Or have dark powers?” he joked, before glancing at the paper and starting to read off it. “Alena Igorevna Leonova. Born on November 23 1990 in St. Petersburg. Height 159 centimeters, weight 50 kilograms, Your personal best score is 184.28, obtained at Worlds 2012. Previous coach…Nikolai Alexandrovich Morozov. See? Just your basic information from the Federation,” he continued, looking at me intently, with his smile still on.

 

That did not sound too comforting, as I did not remember providing things such as my own parents’ contact details and address to the Federation. I looked back at him with wide eyes, meeting his gaze. However, a heavy, foggy feeling clouded over my mind, making my head hurt. I rubbed it slowly as I took deep breaths, trying to relieve my pain. This feeling wasn’t new to me, as I often had such occurrences when arguing with Kolya Morozov. Within a few moments, the feeling cleared up and I was able to meet my new coach’s eyes once again, my thoughts about mind reading and dark powers pushed to the back of my mind. I simply nodded, but a part of me wondered once again, why the feeling came back. Wasn’t I in St. Petersburg, where Kolya couldn’t find me? Wasn’t it just a moment ago when I had an odd thought about the kindly man who sat in front of me? I, for some reason, somehow couldn’t bring myself to say what I was originally going to say, however.

 

“Yes, of course. I mean, I did forget about that. Look, I’m twenty-three and not fifteen,” I chuckled nervously, the words sounding a bit odd as they came out of me. On the one hand, I generally did not think of myself as old, and many often mistook me for about eighteen or nineteen because of my short stature. But then, in terms of figure skating, I secretly thought that I definitely was old. I mean, I was the oldest Ladies’ skater in the country, and the Federation believed that I was practically ancient and was subtly pushing me to retire, preferring the younger skaters even though I was capable of delivering. I never vocalized this, however…until now, somehow. Rukavitsyn gave me a pitying glance as he took my hand in both of his.

 

“Look, Alena…twenty-three isn’t at all old. Is the Federation making you think that way? Trust me when I say that you aren’t. To keep holding on for so long…you’re a fighter, you know? You have spirit, and I like that in you,” he said, giving me a thumbs-up. I smiled back. At least he wasn’t going to give up on me, even if the damn Federation was about to. “Let them think that way, but for me…you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it. They might have issues, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t do anything. You’re strong, powerful…” he continued. I raised an eyebrow, wondering what he meant. He was talking rather cryptically all of a sudden, in a manner that I did not expect from him.  He opened his drawer, and took out an odd object, pushing it towards me. I looked down at it and saw that it was a small, stuffed doll. The doll had a bald head and was dressed in a dark suit. On the back of its head, the word “Rukavitsyn” was stitched in white thread. I picked it up and looked at him.

 

“And…what am I supposed to do again, man?” I asked, looking at him curiously. He responded by pushing a long, black-capped pin towards me. As I touched it, my head started feeling that same foggy sensation once more. I tried to shake it off rather than react this time, however. Perhaps I was just tired, that was all. Picking up the pin, I looked it over and somehow, I had a thought on how to use it. Now, I wasn’t one who utilized voodoo dolls in my spare time, but a doll and a pin…this had to be voodoo, right? My coach was eccentric, that was for sure. Picking up the doll, I stuck the pin into the doll’s abdomen without much thought. Perhaps this was his way of helping keep my spirits up.

 

I was greeted by a shocking response. My coach cried out in pain as he clutched his stomach and collapsed from his chair, onto the ground. I dropped the doll onto the table and strode towards the old man, grabbing his arm to help him up. I did _not_ expect this sort of response from the simple thing I just did.

 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” I apologized, my heart racing. What could have caused him to collapse? Surely it wasn’t because of what I did, right? No, it couldn’t be. Magic did not exist, and he collapsed possibly because of some stomach trouble. I looked at him worriedly, tucking a stray strand of hair behind my ear. After a few moments, he looked at me, his eyes almost smiling. What was wrong with him? Was he a masochist or something?

 

“Beautiful, Alena. _Beautiful_ ,” he murmured in a soft, yet rather patronizing voice, as if he just witnessed something great. I scratched my head in confusion. What exactly did I do that merited his praise anyway?

 

“Uh, coach…” I started, but he cut me off.

 

“Tell me, do you know the rumors surrounding your former coach, Alena?” he asked. I crossed my arms and leaned against my chair. Of course Kolya Morozov’s relationships weren’t rumors. They were fact, and I’ve seen them with my own two eyes. Unless he was talking about Kolya’s alleged skill with the dark arts, again another set of stupid rumors that shouldn’t be taken at face value.

 

“Kolya’s relationships aren’t rumors. They’re real. Yes, I’ve heard about the voodoo magic ones, but I really think that he just has really nasty habits and gestures,” I replied, standing my ground. No, he wasn’t about to tell me that I just performed magic. It was just a terrible coincidence that he collapsed after I stuck the pin…

 

“Alena. You might not believe me, but you have to. Voodoo magic does indeed exist, and Morozov is indeed a practitioner. Why else would he sit so close to the rink? And why do you think certain…accidents seem to happen?” Rukavitsyn’s gaze pierced me as he spoke slowly and deliberately. It was a gaze that unsettled me, and I twisted one of the three rings on my left hand for me to take my attention off it. “Alena, look at me.”

 

“Give me one reason to believe that this madness is true. Magic only exists in stories, and we all know it,” I demanded, looking at him in the eye, challenging him to give me proof. He met my gaze, and drew out one more doll and placed it in front of him. This doll had dark hair, and was wearing a black-and-red Spanish-style dress that reminded me of my Carmen outfit. He took out a long pin, similar to the one I used, and stabbed the doll on its right arm. Almost instantly, a sharp, searing pain erupted from my right arm and I gasped, sliding out of my seat as I grabbed my throbbing arm.

 

_No, it can’t be… why did it happen again? What does he have to do with Morozov?_

“Do you believe now? I was Morozov’s mentor, and yes, we both have the capability to perform the dark arts. You, Alena…you have so much power inside you, and you must hone it. This is the way you could work against the Federation that wants to abandon you, the only way they’ll remember you….” he rambled, pulling out the doll again and sticking more pins into it. My body exploded with burning pain.

 

_Fine, I believe in it, but there’s no way in hell I’m joining you! Go find someone else to manipulate!_

My head started to pound, as if punishing me for having such thoughts. The cloudy feeling once again fogged over my thoughts, though this time it was colder, and more intense. I stayed on the floor, unable to pull myself back up on the chair. I shut my eyes and shook my head, making an effort to ease the pain, but the cold, icy grip refused to let up.

 

_Don’t you want to keep competing? Don’t you feel as if the Federation is trying to push you out because of your age? Not giving you any chances even though you’re one of the best in the world? Rage, rage against them!_

Somehow, the pain left me just as suddenly as it came, and I grabbed onto the chair, feeling drained and tired. My head still hurt, but he was right. If I was real fighter, I had to take action, practice voodoo magic…

 

“Yes…I understand. I wouldn’t allow myself to fall. Teach me everything…” a voice said as the world began to blur.

 

And it was mine.

 

“Beautiful, Alena. _Beautiful_.”

 

 


	8. Hit The Bottle

It was almost midnight…not that it was even dark in the first place, as it was the height of the midnight sun season after all. Kostya was out enjoying, but unlike him, I enjoyed my sleep and wasn’t a night person, even if “night” was more like early evening today. I was lying on my bed, experiencing a light, dreamless sleep before I heard loud, incessant pounding on my door. I closed my eyes, trying to ignore it the best I could. I was dreaming, I thought, or it was probably someone knocking on my neighbor’s door. But no, the pounding continued, continuous and loud, as if the person doing it was some sort of madman.

 

The logical, rational part of me wanted to go back to sleep, because perhaps, I was just hearing things, that it was just some mistake. Typical of me however, my more sensitive, altruistic side won once again. Dragging myself out of bed and not bothering to switch on the lights, I shuffled out of my bedroom and towards my main apartment door, dressed in just a light pink nightdress that Kostya had bought me a few months ago. I quickly unlocked it, and opened it. Someone stood at the doorway, and though most of the lights were out, I could make out a small, female figure with her long, straight dark hair all over her face, and wearing a short, light green sundress, the kind of dress one would wear out to drink and party on a midsummer night like this. She did look kind of familiar, but I wasn’t not sure where I knew her from…

 

“Who are you? What -” I started to ask, but I was cut off by the girl’s drunken rambling.  

 

_Also, how do you know where I live?!_

“...for this world was all a dream, for we were young and happy…. right?” she mumbled, wandering into my kitchen and opening the cabinets at random. There was a faint smell of alcohol in the air, indicating that she had either drank or was drunk. I suspected the latter, judging from her movements and words. Neither was she even aware that I was standing right behind her.

 

“Excuse me, but do you know where you are? What’s the last thing you remember?” I ask, putting my hands on her bare shoulders. I could have thrown her out or called the cops, but I wasn’t that kind of person. I was trying to help her, as she was probably drunkenly oblivious to the world around her. No answer came from her as she pulled some cans of beer out of one of my cabinets, before collapsing onto my sofa.

 

_Who put the beer in there? Kostya…didn’t I tell you not to leave your drinks here? This is not a bar!_

“.....yes, I was happy. Well of course I’m happy! Don’t you worry about me, love…I just woke up from a weird dream! About magic! Dark magic…” she suddenly exclaimed. She probably wasn’t aware of her surroundings, but…how did she somehow know about dark magic? Did she know about Rukavitsyn?

 

_Then again, these are just the ramblings of a drunk person…a familiar looking drunk person._

“Could you please tell me what your name is?” I asked, keeping my voice steady as I on the sofa next to her. “Do you know someone named Zhenya…uh, Evgeni Rukavitsyn?”

 

Instantly, she looked up, her eyes wide and she begins to stare at me. Gray eyes…I only knew one girl with such distinct gray eyes.

 

_Alenka?!_

I never saw her as the type of person who’d act this way. Yes, she loved good drinks, but this was entirely different…though it shouldn’t be so unexpected given her history, and what I glimpsed in her mind…signs of mind control aside from seeing her immense power. She had been influenced by Morozov and now, Rukavitsyn…. she was just a victim of their little game of dark magic, and mind control through dark magic does screw up the mind. The girl who sat next to me was far from the outgoing, happy and rebellious girl I knew. I had to do something…

 

“...yes, of course I know that madman! He’s got that smile, but it’s just an illusion, just a facade… because I woke up from a dream and my life isn’t reality as I’m supposed to be a happy person but I’m not…” she kept going on, opening another can of beer and drinking it. Alenka was definitely aware of his true personality, though not consciously so.

 

“Is everything alright? How can I help you?” I asked her, even though she was still drinking the beer, unaware of my presence. Suddenly though, she grabbed my shoulder, staring into my eyes with a look that I would call haunted.

 

“You’re here too? It this a dream or reality?! TELL ME WHAT’S REAL!” she exclaimed, grabbing my arms and shaking me, almost pushing me onto the floor as she did. Despite being considerably smaller than I was, she was strong for her size. I tried to associate this version of her in front of me with the Alenka I thought I knew, the one whom I thought was her true self. Which was the real Alenka? My thoughts were cut off, as she started talking again.

 

“So, once upon a time, I fell in love with the raven and got married. What did I get in return? Getting shoved off a cliff by some dolls?” she asked, as I tried to figure out what exactly she was talking about or alluding to, or if she was even talking about something that made any sense at all. Taking one last gulp, some of the liquid spilling on the front of her dress, she finished off the beer. I thought that it was her last, but she got up, headed to the kitchen and started searching my cabinet for more alcohol, falling further and further into fantasy while remaining oblivious to me and my attempts at helping her…

 

“Is there anything I can do to help you?” I asked as she came back and dropped herself onto the couch. I pulled out my phone and began inputting the hospital’s number. The last thing I wanted for her to hurt herself, but she wasn’t responding to me at all…this was the only thing I could do to help.

 

_Apart from preventing her from falling even further off the cliff of insanity? Along with Kostya?_

“Make the dream real…I don’t want to wake up, I just want to live in a world where I didn’t leave Moscow, where I’m happy with him, my raven… Please, just let me fall asleep forever and never wake up…..” she rambled once again, and I widened my eyes in shock from what I heard. Alenka couldn’t be trying to kill herself for any reason, she couldn’t be trying to drink herself into oblivion…what exactly was driving to the edge? Was it only the alcohol talking, or was I witnessing the effects of both long-term mind control and alcohol? Who was the “raven”?

 

_Don’t people get irrationally happy right before they kill themselves? Because they’re finally doing the right thing, according to them at least…_

I began to search up suicide hotline numbers, hoping that I’d find one before she does anything stupid, does anything to harm herself. She could definitely hear me, and I didn’t want her to think that my lack of reaction meant that I didn’t care about her, especially because I did.

 

“Don’t kill yourself!” I exclaimed, hoping she’ll hear me…I probably should’ve said something better, but that was the only thing I could come up with, considering my stressed mind, to say to her. She was still lost in an alcoholic haze…and began to laugh.

 

“I’m not going to die! I’m going to live again!” she exclaimed, as I search my mind for anything that could fix her, anything that can help her with her current situation, her troubled state, her alcoholic tendencies when under stress, and god knows what else Morozov and Zhenya might have caused her to have. If this is the effect magic and mind control had on people, I wanted no part in it…I had to take care of her, make sure that she wasn’t going to be victimized and controlled by Zhenya or Kostya because of her powers. I hung up the phone, and carried it with me to the living room. I looked at my friend, deciding that I had to take matters into my own hands rather than risk having her get taken away and be forced to stop competing. I walked over to my couch and raised the phone, before bringing it down.

 

BANG!

 

* * *

 

“Ugh…where am I…? How did I get here…” Alenka murmured as she slowly pushed herself up into a sitting position, most likely being confused at how she ended up lying on my sofa, surrounded by beer cans, and getting a large stain on the front of her dress.

 

I didn’t know if I should tell her the truth on how she got here. What I had witnessed last night was not Alenka, that was for sure. Here she was, talking normally, acting like she usually did. Last night was most probably some form of twisted image inside her mind, likely a product of recent control, that she unfortunately expressed verbally. I was both relieved and scared, relieved that the real Alenka was the one I always knew, and scared because I didn’t know whether I had already experienced any form of mind control myself…

 

_No, I mustn’t speak of the episode with Alenka. I do not want her to think that she is that way, because she’s not. I must know the signs of control, and tell her about them… I must also watch out as well…_

 

Did she love someone back in Moscow? Was this the raven she spoke of? Maybe all she needed was a close friend she could talk to and share her secrets with, someone who’d side with her, especially when she couldn’t trust her own coach. If she really wanted to perform voodoo, she at least had to make the decisions for herself.

 

“Hey, you were partying last night. Who told you to drink that much anyway?”   

 

 


	9. What A Way To Fall

_Alina, can you please visit me? I have something to show you._

_-Evgeni Rukavisityn_

 

I wasn’t sure why exactly my old coach would want me to see him, as I was taking a hiatus from skating for a bit and wasn’t even in the same nation as he was, but maybe the LSA wanted me to come back, for there wasn’t anyone else left after me?

 

_Okay, I suppose I have enough time to visit Russia and talk to him for a bit…. I’d always liked him, for he was so understanding and open…._

I sent a message to him, telling him that I’d be there in a few days, and quickly booked a rather cheap flight to St. Petersburg. After all, I just had to get there and meet him as quickly as I could to find out what exactly he needed.

 

* * *

 

“Alina, it’s great to see you again!” Zhenya exclaimed as I made my way inside the familiar rinkside cafe and took a seat across him. Nothing had changed in terms of his looks over the past year, he still had the same kind blue eyes and gentle smile. There were a pair of coffees sitting in the center of the table, which prompted me to grab one and began to drink from it, hoping that the caffeine would wake me up a bit after the plane ride.

 

_So, let’s see how the LSA is trying to convince me to come back this year. I‘m not retiring, just taking a year off before I decide what to do with my life._

“I’m not here to be your federation’s messenger, Alina.” Zhenya quipped as he pulled out a laptop. It was almost like he could read my mind, but he was most likely just good with reading expressions and had good intuition. I mean, I was under him for a short time…it was just natural that he knew me.

 

“So, if that’s the case, why am I here?” I asked as he opened up a video of a girl with blonde hair skating to Carmen, who landed a triple toeloop-triple toeloop combination, triple lutz, and double axel. I assumed that she was probably one of his Russian students, but wasn’t sure why he’d show me this video….

 

“Well, how’s that for the future of Latvia in figure skating?” he asked, pausing the video. I looked at it closely, trying to figure out who exactly the skater was. My mind drew a blank when I saw her face.

 

_What?! Who is this person, and why did I have no idea that she existed until today?_

_Granted, there’s also a high chance that she’s a Russian skating for some other nation….._

“Surprising, isn’t it? Especially when you consider who she is…” Zhenya rambled, most likely noticing the surprised expression on my face…..

 

“So she’s a Russian expatriate?” I asked, taking another sip of my coffee. I was all to used to that occurrence, considering the depth among the ladies in there. It was a place where even a minor mistake at Nationals could cost anyone her spot on the Europeans and Worlds teams. My coach’s response was to scroll down and show me the name of the girl.

 

_Angelina Kuchvalska….. wait, what?! How did she get from a girl with no flip and lutz to….. this?!_

“Strange, don’t you think? How she got to this point, how she’s also performing flips and double axel-triple toeloops, and how she isn’t the only girl in Latvia performing this layout?” he asked, most likely still aware of the surprised expression on my face. He rubbed his bald head and gave me a knowing smirk. What exactly was he implying with that statement?

 

“There’s another girl doing this?!” I exclaimed, my raised voice prompting some of the other customers to look in our direction. I probably shouldn’t have yelled, but it was natural for anyone in shock to react in such a way. Why was I completely unaware of the sudden emergence of skaters at this level?

 

Zhenya pulled up another video, one of a girl with dark blonde hair who was wearing orange and yellow…. who also landed a triple toeloop-triple toeloop, triple lutz, and double axel.

 

“She also isn’t Russian and is currently too young to be eligible for the world championships. Name’s Diana Nikitina…amazing aren’t they, Alina? These girls following in your footsteps?” he asked, and I was still staring at the video in shock, trying to figure out if I’d heard of her or not…the name didn't ring any bells to me either.

_When did Latvia start investing in figure skating? Both Angelina and Diana are younger than me, but they’ve already gone beyond my level…._

“Isn’t it a bit like that weird dream you had, when you were debating your retirement?” he asked, pulling me out of my thoughts. Why did he have to bring retirement up at such a bad time, when it looked like there were now others ready to overtake me and push me out?

 

“What?!” I exclaimed, trying to figure out exactly what tangent he was going on, as I didn’t recall ever talking to him about my dreams, hell I didn’t recall telling anyone about my dreams at all. I never thought of him to be a creeper, and he always seemed nice. But this? This was beyond what I thought him to be capable of. Was he purposely assuming things that somehow, turned out to be right?

 

“...The one with what’d happen to Latvia if the Federation actually invested money into figure skating…and I made it into your reality. You don’t have to keep spinning your wheels, Alina…”  he rambled, and it felt like the walls were suddenly closing in on me, like they were suffocating me for some odd reason… Never in my life had I felt that terrible around him. His calm face was now somehow penetrating and dangerous. I then realized that I really never knew all that there was to my coach.

 

_How do you know about that one? I don’t tell people about my dreams! What was your exact role in the rises of Angelina and Diana, and why doesn’t any of this feel natural?!_

“Um, I have to leave now, nice meeting you again…” I mumbled, before grabbing my coffee and running out of the rink, trying to escape that terrible feeling, trying to escape his gaze and the walls…

 

“I just wanted to liberate you…Alina.”  

 

His voice was like a whisper picked up by the wind, lingering in my head even as I left the rink.

 

 


	10. Bad Karma

“Congratulations on your short!” Kostya exclaimed as we stood in the entrance hall of the stadium after the Ladies’ short event, handing me a cup of hot cappuccino. I’d landed all of my jumps, including my triple-triple combination, and had surprisingly finished in fourth place despite skating first. I must admit that I knew that my program components mark probably took a hit from that fact, as it was no secret that judges were always stingy towards those who skated first. Had I skated in the second group, I would have broken 60 for sure. There were five minutes to go before the Men’s short started, and I was glad that I got to see Kostya before that.

 

“Thanks! Good luck to you too!” I exclaim, before gulping down the warm drink, exhausted but happy. I liked seeing him smile like that. Reminded me of the real him, the Kostya who was warm and not hell-bent on revenge. I knew that he still had that side to him, it was just that he was driven past the point of no return, and now he was in a very deep hole that he did not want to get out of. We were about to head back, me towards the and him towards the rinkside, when he picks me up and hugs me. It would be funny to any passerby, as he was a bit shorter than I was, but my Kostya was stronger than he looked. I smiled as he released me and walked me towards my seat in the stands, planting a kiss on my head before heading down to the rinkside. I looked down, and for some strange reason, my duffel bag is open. I’m about to close it when I notice a small doll with brown hair who’s wearing a familiar black-and-blue costume. I rolled my eyes a bit, realizing where most of our costume budget must have gone, making me resort to wearing one of his shirts as my outfit for the free skate. I turn it over…

 

_Kovtun._

No. He couldn’t have brought the dolls to France, couldn’t have decided that now was a good time to continue his personal vendetta against Maxim Kovtun, couldn’t be telling me to stick pins into a doll of Maxim in front of so many people, who would probably find my actions very suspicious and send me to a psychiatrist…but no matter how much I tried to deny it, that was the truth right in front of me.

 

_Damn, how could I have allowed myself to be so weak? I chose to learn to keep him in check, but now..._

I couldn’t let this dark magic corrupt him and Alena any longer. I did not want to wake up one day and discover that the Kostya I fell in love with has disappeared, replaced by a ruthless man of dark magic, and I certainly did not want Alena to be even more damaged than she already was thanks to Morozov’s influence, though she never realized it even up to now...but I couldn’t dwell on hypotheticals at this time. If were to save them, I had to be proactive. I had to continue deceiving them into thinking that I condone voodoo…which meant that I had to follow orders and stab the doll in my hands.

 

Kostya was to skate seventh out of all of these men, while Maxim, ninth. In between them, there was one man. In those minutes, I would decide what to exactly I would choose to do with this doll. Thankfully, there was nobody sitting anywhere near me. Still though, I took out a scarf from my bag and buried the doll within its folds, just to be sure. The announcer calls out the first group of men as I extract the pins from my bag. There was no doll of Adian Pitkeev, who was to skate second in this group, and I hoped that there never would be. I can’t see Kostya viewing someone who’s debuting in seniors and is sixteen as a threat…

 

_If that’s the case, explain the dolls of Lipnitskaya, Radionova, Pogorilaya, Sakhanovich, Medvedeva, Proklova, Sotskova, Kayumova, Iushenko, Pervushkina, Ogoreltseva…_

I told him multiple times that he shouldn’t be cursing any of my competitors, that I can get onto the Grand Prix series and succeed at nationals without his brand of help.

 

_Why exactly are you using dark magic on girls who are half your age…no, they’re even younger than that, why would you want to curse teenage girls, Kostya?!_

He claimed that he was helping Alena and me. And he was. In the federation’s eyes, I was “old” even though I clearly am only twenty-one. More so Alena, who was turning twenty-four in two days. There was no doubt that both of us still wanted to compete, but the Federation really was limiting us by choosing to send the same team of girls every time, unless they were really forced to. He just so happened to be helping us by cursing young girls. I understood where he was coming from, but surely there was some other way? If only the Federation realized that every one of us would be considered valuable in any other country, that we were all capable of placing… The first man took the ice, but I couldn’t bring myself to focus on anything he was doing. I was still conflicted about whether I should stick the cursed pins into the doll or not.

 

Adian Pitkeev stepped onto the ice as I stuffed the pins and the doll back into my bag. I look up from it as he executes his quad, which he steps out of. But…was it a genuine error? Had someone else made a doll of him and stuck it with a pin, causing the stepout? Was he really in control of anything he does on the ice?! Were there… _other_ dark magicians in the stadium? I shuddered at that thought. I certainly did not want such thing to be the norm, though it was looking more and more likely considering Morozov and my own coach.

 

_Maria, get ahold of yourself! You’re being irrational again. Of course wizards and dark masters aren’t the norm and you know it!_

I couldn’t focus for the rest of his skate. I wished that I had outlets like Alena did in order to calm myself down. Yes, she was moody and had a few vices, but I couldn’t blame her, not after I became aware of  _damaged_ she actually was, due to Morozov’s powers. My attention was finally turned back to the rink when Adian’s score was announced, and he went into first place with a score of 76.21 points, over an American who appeared to have erred multiple times and will most likely end the competition in last place.

 

For a moment, I envied that person. At least he knew that there most likely wasn’t a puppetmaster willing him to fail.

 

Once again, I pulled the doll out of my bag along with my scarf, and rested them on my lap, carefully arranging the scarf. The doll looked like the sort of toy people threw onto the ice after amazing performances, not a doll that could cause bad things to happen. I thought of throwing it onto the ice after the next person skated, but I couldn’t. Besides the fact that the doll certainly did _not_ look like the curly-haired blond American skating in front of me, I still had to do something for Kostya’s sake. Despite his actions, I knew how it felt to be snubbed and pushed aside. Besides, I did not want someone to accidentally, or worse, purposely murder Maxim Kovtun through the doll, if the possibility of other dark masters in the stadium turned out to be true. At least I was in control, and my magic wasn’t nearly as powerful as Kostya’s and Alena’s.

 

I passed through the rest of this group in a state of internal conflict, not really paying attention to anything that was going on until the second group takes the ice.

 

“Go Kostya!” I cheered, wrapping the doll in my scarf and standing up at the same time that he skated to the center of the ice. I hoped that he was going to do great. I wanted him to do well, and hopefully not see any need to use the doll. I stood and watched until the warm-up was over, watching my Kostya practice executing his jumps - beautifully of course. Six men had finished skating, and the seventh one up was Konstantin Alexandrovich Menshov, the man my heart belonged to, despite his weaknesses. He was wearing a shirt which he had screen-printed with my face. I smiled as I remembered how we agreed how we would each use a part of each other for our costumes. Why couldn’t Kostya always be that way?

 

His short program turned out almost perfect. Apart from minor bobbles on his quadruple salchow and triple axel, everything was cleanly executed. The crowd began to applaud, and I joined in.

 

“Yes!” I exclaimed, as his score is announced. An 87.47, which was a very high score that only skaters like Zhenya Plushenko would obtain on a regular basis. Kostya went into first place with a nearly ten point lead.

 

I was going to throw the doll away. Kostya shined, and that sort of performance did not need the help of magic in order to be better than Maxim’s, but Kovtun had scored higher than that in the past, and I couldn’t risk it, not when I saw where Kostya was coming from, and when there was the chance that he could catch me. There was a chance of Maxim bombing even without the doll, but still…. I couldn’t bring myself to take that risk. I just needed a little more time to compose myself.

 

I’d missed all of the last skater, and Maxim took the ice as I pulled the pins out of my bag and fixed the scarf covering the doll..

 

_I’m sorry. Please…if you ever find out about this…forgive me…._

I stuck the first pin into the doll as he popped his quadruple salchow-triple toe into a quadruple salchow-double toe. I could stop now, but there was still a chance of him overtaking Kostya…and that made my love a very desperate, dark man who might do even worse things. I stuck a second pin into the doll, and he falls on his quadruple toe. And then for some reason, perhaps it was my mind clouding over from fatigue, I managed to make myself stick another pin into the doll, causing him to fall on his triple axel.

 

I couldn’t believe what I’d just done. I felt like fainting.

 

I exited my seat for the restroom as the loudspeaker announced that Maxim scored 77.11 points, and was currently in fourth place, I hurried through the corridor, my head pounding and my body protesting. I wasn’t as strong as Kostya and Alenka, and this made it painfully obvious. I didn’t know how long I spent inside the cubicle, vomiting my guts out, but I received a text message from Kostya as I exited.

 

_Great job. ;)_

* * *

 

 

I knew exactly why I fell three times in my free skate and dropped to sixth place after the second night. Each fall was a punishment for each pin I stuck into that doll…. and I wasn’t going to pin Maxim today, not if I was going to suffer this way later on. I sincerely doubted that he could reach the podium anyway, being around 10 points away from bronze and 15 points away from first. It would take a lot of errors from everyone else for that to happen.

 

But somehow, he won, and in the end, it was Kostya who dropped down to fourth. Maybe it was just the ice, or perhaps it was something else.

 

I shiver in my seat, looking around the stadium once more. Were Morozov and Rukavitsyn the only ones with dark powers? Was someone with magic trying to punish Kostya and me?

 

Maybe, just maybe, I wasn’t wrong in suspecting otherwise.

 

 


	11. Alternate: What If?

_Perfect. Just perfect. Don’t you agree?_

No, I didn’t. I wanted that little voice in my head to shut up, as it kept on insulting me about how I performed in my short program. Yesterday, and during my warm-ups, I had felt perfectly confident about my state. The trouble started sometime during the first group of men. I was just sitting backstage when I felt a sudden, sharp pain in both my legs for some reason.

 

Admittedly, it wasn’t that bad at first, but my legs kept feeling like someone was sticking burning pins into them. Part of me wanted to withdraw, but I couldn’t. I had to win this event, had to prove to the Federation that I can follow in Zhenya’s footsteps, that my skates at worlds in 2013 and nationals in 2014 were just random flukes, that I can be relied on….

 

_That they should’ve sent me to the Olympics instead of Zhenya._

The warmup was able to distract me from the pain, but I felt like my head was about to explode with pain and internal conflict during both of the skaters before me.

_Just withdraw! You’ve already won a gold medal on this circuit, defeated Hanyu, finished fourth at worlds last year…._

_Yeah, and I only beat him because he collided with Han Yan. That’s not really going to look good to the Federation. They already have enough doubts about you…_

And then, during my actual skate, I popped my quadruple salchow-triple toeloop into a quadruple salchow-double toeloop and fallen on both my quadruple toeloop and triple axel.

 

_They’re certainly going to love that. Watching you bomb and be defeated by a thirty year old._

The crowd was politely applauding, and I wanted to tell them to shut up, but that would be rude, and I already had a bad reputation among online fans of skating that didn’t escape my notice. A flower girl handed me a doll as I exit, and I smiled at her, as it was a very well-made doll of me in my short program costume. Who was that awesome fan who created this? I wanted to meet her, and tell her I loved it, assuming that it was a she of course, as I’ve never met that many guys who could sew this well. It wasn’t everyday that someone could make a doll of you after all. I hoped that I didn’t disappoint whomever made this doll…they even stitched my name on its back in electric blue, even though it was mostly hidden under the hair.

 

I scored 77.11 points and go into fourth, only a point ahead of Adian Pikteev, who was a newbie. Shameful, wasn’t it? Absentmindedly, I tossed the doll into the air, almost dropping it on my lap. I then felt a strange pain in my legs, identical to the ones I felt before my skate.

 

_Because this doll is just a proxy for you, right? If you were to set this doll on fire, you’d die too._

I was going crazy. I just had to be going crazy for thinking that way. It was just a coincidence. Magic, of course, didn’t exist and the doll was just a doll…a cool, well-made creation…  

 

_Right?_

_Either way, you’ll find out eventually…._

* * *

 

I found out the truth the next day. I’d managed to win the event and qualify for the Final, but there was a part of my brain that was still yelling at me, telling me that I only won because everyone else fell apart, that it’s the only reason why I succeeded. The rest of the team was congratulating me when someone passed me a sheet of paper.

 

_Could you please come with me for a bit? I need to tell you something._

I didn’t know why, but I instantly began to follow her out the door, even though she could’ve been trying to hurt me…. despite her beauty and her seemingly harmless vibe. She handed me another sheet of paper.

 

_I don’t want anyone to hear us. Do you have the doll with you?_

“Yes?” I answered, pulling it out of my bag. She took it from me and jabbed it with a pencil, and I almost collapsed, but she caught me with both her hands, for she was tall and pretty strong after all. I wanted to scream after I realized what had just happened, for that doll…was indeed a proxy for me, just as I initially suspected but wanted to deny.

 

_Sorry. I’m Maria Artemieva. If you have any questions, please write them down. They can’t hear us…._

_WHY?!_ I wrote in bold, dark strokes. Maybe I shouldn’t have written it in all capital letters, but I couldn’t help myself, especially with what I just found out. Someone on the team was willing me to fail and cursing me into getting injured, and I had no idea who the hell they were, nor did I have any leads. Unless _Maria_ was the culprit. She was the one who demonstrated the magic after all. As if she read my mind, however, she wrote something else on the paper.

_Revenge. He wants to prove to the Federation that he is the one they should care about. Not you._

_Who exactly is this? When have they done this to me? Do I have any control over my results?!_

She was about to scribble a reply when we heard footsteps of someone walking towards us, before tossing it at me, scribbling something onto it as I stuffed it into my bag.

 

“Ah, I was looking for the restroom.” she said as I unfolded the paper and begin to read. There were only three words on it.

 

_I don’t know._

I did not want this to be the answer to question three. I did not want to find out that I was not totally in control of my results…. but the answer was plain to see on her face. As to who it was, she never named. Was she covering up for him? Or was she trying to shift blame from herself and frame someone else? There was only one thing I knew for sure.

 

There was a vengeful practitioner of dark magic on our team, and I am just their pawn.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of an aside to the last chapter. What if Artemieva threw the doll onto the ice?


	12. Event Horizon

“Well, here we go…” Kostya announced as he walked into his living room, kissing me on the cheek as he dropped something into my hand before seating himself on my other side. I wanted to think that he was just grabbing it for a quick squeeze, but knowing him, it was more likely for there to be an ulterior motive behind that. I looked down, and a little blonde doll dressed in red lay face-down in my palm.

 

_Radionova. Damn, I forgot…_

Just two days ago, Zhenya gathered us and encouraged us to have some fun during the Grand Prix Final. By “fun”, he meant a viewing party that was to involve hexing and cursing, of course. Now here we were in Kostya’s living room, sitting on his couch and dressed in our nightclothes, with an array of snacks and stimulating drinks spread out on the coffee table in front of us. Kostya had chosen not to put on a shirt, I wore a short lavender babydoll, and Alenka had on a black tank top and red shorts. To the average person, we looked like three friends, pigging out while watching our favorite sport, a very normal thing to do. How I wished that watching was all we were doing…

 

_Why is she part of your revenge-plot, Kostya?! She’s only 15! Even if I did anything to her, it’s not going to affect us at all….._

“Why are we doing it to her in particular, Kostya?” I asked, as Rika Hongo took the ice. I wasn’t all too worried about Kostya cursing the Japanese girl. After all, I never noticed him try his powers out on foreigners, making me think that his powers could only stretch out too far, which relieved me. The last thing I wanted was for us to be involved in an international voodoo conspiracy plot or something along those lines.

 

“She’s the more logical choice between her and Tuktamysheva, as the other two are givens… Younger, more of a darling, more likely to succumb to puberty anytime soon,” he reasoned, as he handed another doll to Alenka.

 

“Wouldn’t it still be illogical, as she’s been incredibly consistent for all this season and last?” I asked, hoping to dissuade him from pinning her, which’ll hopefully make him realize that it was just as irrational to pin Lipnitskaya and Pogorilaya, despite their inconsistencies. I mean, they were still children!

 

_Also, isn’t what Elizaveta did…the sort of thing you should’ve done to rise in the ranks, Kostya?_

“Admittedly, that does work out…. maybe we should just go with Tuktamysheva, as any mistakes could just be chalked up to exhaustion and fatigue…” he suddenly mused, his mouth curling up into a devious smirk as he grabbed my hand. Damn, I didn’t mean to give him that idea. I shook my head, wanting so much to bury my face in my hands and groan. Did everything to do with skating and competition in the country have to revolve around hexing?

 

_No, we shouldn’t be pinning anyone! I’m well aware of the Federation’s distaste for us, but this isn’t the right way to counter it!_

_Oh, Kostya, if only you put half the energy you waste in cursing everyone into training…then again, there’s still the issue of Zhenya and what he could do to us with his dolls…_

_Am I willing to risk murder and brainwashing?_

 

A braver person would’ve said yes. I knew that Alenka herself gave Zhenya a difficult time initially, judging from her complaints about headaches, and I knew that he and Kostya would use their powers to persuade and brainwash her regularly. But I suppose I was just like any other ordinary accomplice…

 

Rika Hongo scored 61.10 points as Ashley Wagner took the ice. Kostya appeared to be convincing Alenka into using her powers on someone, further taking advantage of her and messing with her mind…

 

_Then again…does he know how broken she really is?_

The dolls of the men and Tuktamysheva were still sitting on the table. Impulsively, I grabbed the black-haired female doll, and began walking towards his room as Wagner begins to spin.

 

_I’ll come back for the men later…hopefully, he’ll just think they got lost in the closet or something….._

“Masha, I don’t want you to hurt yourself! I’m not going to overexert myself with only two dolls!” Kostya exclaimed, getting up and grabbing my hand as I neared his room. Somewhere, deep down, the old him was still in there, even if he was corrupted by his magic. The sweet, caring and protective Kostya…I still felt him at that moment.

 

“I’m going to be fine. Don’t worry.” I answered, as he handed me the canister of pins. I entered his bedroom with a pair of dolls as Julia Lipnitskaya took the ice, and closed the door tightly. Locking it would make him suspicious, and I didn’t want him to find out what exactly I was doing.

 

_If he’s telling Zhenya everything, then he’ll most likely find me less suspicious due to this…_

I quickly made my way into his closet, closing the door behind me. The dolls emotionlessly stared at me, their eyes glinting in the darkness, as if they were all passing judgement on my life, passing judgment on their executioner…was I going mad? I shook my head and held on to the dolls. The closet was hot and stuffy, but I didn’t care. I just didn’t want to be near him at the moment.

 

_If you found out who caused your errors, would you forgive me? Expose me? Help me?_

Something about the small space caused my head to start spinning, making me want to stab myself with the pins in the canister…but it was probably the influence of dark magic, one that could cause self-destruction and corruption, eating you away from the inside until all that was left was revenge…

 

_Why don’t you just burn all the dolls?_

“I’m not risking mass murder and arson.” I answered, hoping that the closet didn’t have lingering effects of Kostya’s magic that was causing me to have such violent thoughts…

 

_If Kostya ever reaches a point where he tries to kill someone through these dolls, who’s to blame? Himself? You? Zhenya? No one?_

I just had to prevent him from ever getting to that point. The real him wouldn’t kill anyone, but that was the Kostya I knew before he discovered magic…the one who wasn’t even willing to hurt anyone without reason too, and was even hesitant to do so if he did have one. If having powers was enough to change his views on hurting others, then it was only a matter of time before he would view killing as fine. I wanted to steer him away, but I was not sure how I can get him back on track.

 

_You know, you could always contact another person? You don’t have to do this alone…but the challenge is making them believe that the rumors of dark powers controlling the sport are real.You just bring the person’s doll with you and pin it. That should work…_

Now that I thought about it, the idea sounded plausible, but there was the problem of having to hurt my chosen partner for them to believe me.

 

_That’s the only option. Live with it._

The walls were closing in on me, crushing my lungs and constricting my breath…I yanked the door open, and dashed out of the closet as Radionova’s music began to play. I held up the doll, shaking my head. It would be suspicious to Zhenya if I didn’t do anything…so the cowardly me basically saw no other choice in the matter. I pulled out a pin from the canister and stuck it into her doll, hoping that she wouldn’t majorly err….

 

* * *

 

_I’ve got to tell someone else about this._

Kostya, Alenka, and I were continuing our unofficial viewing party for the Grand Prix Final in his apartment, one that was about to devolve into yet another voodoo session which I tried to avoid reminding Zhenya about, but he remembered anyway. He then decided that the Final was the perfect time for us to hone our skills on our teammates, by making us work our magic in both the Ladies’ and Men’s events.

 

_Yes, it helps us. That doesn’t mean that we should do it! If Zhenya told you that those dolls could kill people, would you follow him, Kostya?!_

A year ago, he would’ve been horrified and would’ve flat-out refused to do so. Now…only the optimistic part of me would think that he’d react in that manner. What a difference time made to my sweet Kostya! I’ve spent the past year and a half trying to pull him out of this maze, and more than half a year with Alenka…but I was now at wit’s end. I was not sure if I could do this alone. I needed someone to join me, someone who’s been pinned and could serve as an outside force. As I was thinking to myself, six dolls were sitting on the table, their blank eyes emotionlessly staring at me.

 

_I suppose I should just go with someone here…but all of the girls are too young, Maxim’s completely out of the question…I don’t like him, and he already has a nasty enough streak for me to think that Kostya has a point. Sergei…he actually might work?_

I had a number of reasons for thinking Sergei was my best bet. First, he used to be in the same position as us, only to have a breakthrough last season with his placement at Europeans. Second, there was Alenka’s ardent refusal to hex him, she really had strong feelings for him that I sensed, so it would be easier for her to connect with him, which could hopefully unravel her ties to this magic…but would unraveling her connection to the magic unravel her mind as well? I shuddered at the thought, but I wanted to be optimistic about this working.

 

_I couldn’t break her any further…._

As for Kostya…my influence, coupled with that of an outsider in a similar situation, might be able to help his see the light and realize that what he’s doing is completely and utterly wrong. After that, we could go on to expose Rukavitsyn. As to where we would go, I hoped that the Federation would help us find new coaches, and not force us to retire.

 

One person could easily be ignored. Two are harder to do so. Three people become a miniature crowd, which can balloon to four people and five people, then six. All I needed were him and Alenka to help me deal with Kostya and his issues. Sure, I did not wish for Maxim to continue being the Federation’s darling, I didn’t like him as a person after all, but there has to be another way for him to lose favor, without using magic.

 

“If anyone curses you, whether by choice or by force, if anyone causes you any pain…I’m really sorry about that. I just need you to help me deal with this…” I whispered, staring at his doll as someone walked into the room. Thankfully, it was only Alenka.

 

“Hey, do you know what Sergei Voronov’s phone number is?” I asked, looking up from the table. She briefly glanced at me, suspicion rising in her expression before quickly writing something on a sheet of paper and handing it to me.

 

_Alenka, I have no interest in dating him or anyone else besides Kostya right now. I just need him to help me…_

* * *

 

I wasn’t going to pin anyone today. I had no desire to do so, after finding out what I did to Radionova, which worked out terribly well. Unfortunately, my attempts at convincing the others out of pinning Pogorilaya and Lipnitskaya hadn’t worked….

_Pogorilaya’s been on and off all season, Lipnitskaya’s been having issues…. thanks to you! Why do you want to pin them even further?! Haven’t they been broken enough by you! T_ _he Federation expects a sweep, and aren’t they going to find the lack of one a bit suspicious?_

_Finally, how many people are you expecting to pin, just to help us?!_

Anna Pogorilaya took the ice, and I stared at the screen. I wasn’t going to look at either Kostya or Alenka, as they were going to be pinning her. They were doing it without realizing that the person on the other end was someone with feelings and a life, and not an emotionless doll to be merely toyed with. I tried to pretend that I had no idea what the cause of her errors were, that her fall on her triple loop-triple salchow was just a random error and not caused by a pin, that her sudden loss of energy stemmed from the fall, and that her spin errors and apathetic performance had absolutely nothing to do with us. Human mistakes, not magic.

 

_That we’re not the reason behind her tears…yeah, right. Do something! You’re letting them get away with this! You’re just as bad as they are, Masha! Even worse, you’re weak!_

_Thinking about contacting Sergei Voronov? Why don’t you just call him, tell him that you need his help, and stop letting this toxic behavior slide!_

I walked into the bathroom as Elena Radionova’s name was announced, and I hoped that she would remain consistent and not fall this time...and of course I hoped that Kostya and Alenka decided not to do anything. I pulled out my phone and his phone number, and began to enter the digits.

 

_Hello. This is Maria Artemieva, and I need you to help me…._

I just needed to hit the call button…but my hands were frozen in place, I couldn’t bring myself to jump off this ledge. I couldn’t bear to do it. I stared at the screen of my phone, the words repeating themselves in my head.

 

_I just have to do a better job planning this. Besides, he still has to prepare for Nationals and I can’t just scare him like that, and…okay I’ll call him after that, I suppose…_

I exited the bathroom as Elena Radionova went into first place. Julia Lipnitskaya took the ice as I stared at the screen, hoping for nothing to happen to her…. hoping that she wouldn’t be pinned.

 

Oh, how very wrong I was….

 

Her program began with a clean triple lutz-triple toeloop. Then, she fell on her double axel…. which I tried to pretend wasn’t caused by a pin, but couldn’t. Thankfully, her spins, steps, and next two jumps were clean, and I thought that whomever was pinning her had stopped…but I was wrong. The worst was yet to come, and I wished that I didn’t have to see what followed. But I was unfortunately in the wrong place, at the wrong time. First, she popped her flip, which came from an incorrect edge. Next, she tried another flip, only to double it, fall on it and land in a split position. I cringed at that particular moment. She was able to get back up, but ended up doubling her salchow….and I turned away, as I couldn’t bring myself to watch the rest.

 

_So, this is what you do to people, Kostya? I don’t know if you’re fully aware of the humanity of your victims yet…but I’m going to save you._

_Give me a month, and you’ll be rescued from this maze. Both of you will be._

__


	13. Risk Awareness

_So, from the standings of the Grand Prix….. the Federation’s going to rapidly drop you._

Admittedly, I’d expected this course of action regardless of how I did on the circuit, but this year’s results were even less favorable towards me than I’d expected.

 

Then again, did _anyone_ expect Maxim Kovtun to win both of his events and qualify for the Final in first place? Did anyone think that Sergei Voronov would medal at both of his events, and get into the Final at all?

 

Alenka had been strangely happy at this news, for some odd reason. Couldn’t she see that both of them were obstacles in my path, and obstacles must be eliminated? Any personal feelings she had towards Sergei had to be put aside, lest it compromise her willingness to cooperate.

 

_Kostya, if you did what he did…then you wouldn’t need to even be doing this! Isn’t what Sergei did what you should’ve done?!_

Yes. The Federation would’ve noticed me if I’d done that, but unfortunately…I had much stronger fields than he did in terms of Grand Prix assignments, so I had less chance of getting near the podium at my events, and I did skate podium-worthy short programs at both events….

 

_Keep making excuses to justify your immoral acts. If you spent half the time you did cursing people on stamina drills and practicing your long program, you would’ve won two medals on the circuit….._

Morality was a secondary concern. All that mattered as of right now was making the Federation realize that Maxim Kovtun and Sergei Voronov getting into the Final was a complete fluke, and that they would never be competitive with any of the men there. Their dolls sat on my table, one with three pins in its body and one that was completely clean…. for now.

 

Masha and Alenka were still having some sort of girl talk as the warm-up group took the ice, and I had no interest in eavesdropping. It probably wasn’t about anything important anyway. Instead, I focused my attention on the warm-up. Even as it went on, I could already tell that Maxim and Sergei’s abilities were greatly outclassed by the other men on the ice, and that included one who’d been seriously injured only a few weeks ago….

 

_To the Federation,_

_If Hanyu hadn’t run into Han Yan during the warm-up at Cup of China, Maxim Kovtun would not have gotten anywhere near the gold._

_Unfortunately, I don’t think you or Maxim are aware of that fact….._

Yuzuru Hanyu took the ice as I turned back to the table…and Sergei’s doll was missing. It’d probably fallen under the table, but it was necessary that I pin him, lest the Federation put their attention on him as well as Kovtun…..

_Isn’t it a good thing if they do that, for it shows that they do care about older people?_

_Yeah, right…it’s the same Federation who decided not to give me international assignments despite my bronze at Nationals._

Hanyu’s music was playing, but I couldn’t focus at all on his skating, as I was too busy searching the room for Voronov’s doll, which had disappeared into the recesses of my apartment for some reason, even though I clearly remembered that it was right in front of me a few minutes ago. I didn’t see anyone stealing it, for who would want a doll of the second-best male skater in the nation, according to the Federation? My door was locked, and Masha and Alenka were engrossed in their conversation.

 

_Well, first-ranked is a massive jerk, third-ranked is most likely some random junior….. and you don’t exist. Unfortunately for the general public, they have no clue who you are._

Yuzuru Hanyu scored 94.08 points and went into first place. He would most likely stay in that position for the entire event…which eased my worries a bit. However, both Kovtun and Voronov had scored within five points of that number before…

 

_Granted, they’ve only done that a few times, but still….._

Sergei Voronov took the ice, and I still had no idea where his doll was. I would’ve vastly preferred to spend my time pinning it as opposed to searching every nook and cranny of the room, but I had to find this doll, had to make the Federation realize that his qualification was a complete fluke…but I couldn’t find it. I thought for a moment to ask Masha or Alenka if either of them had seen it, but I decided against it. If they weren’t going to participate tonight, then so be it. After all, Hanyu’s score looked like it could ensure that Maxim and Sergei didn’t get anywhere near the podium, considering that Javier Fernandez was more likely to medal, and both Tatsuki Machida and Takahito Mura were capable of achieving very high scores as well.

 

_Anyways, Maxim’s the bigger priority. You can always wait until the freeskate._

He scored 84.48 points, ten points behind Hanyu, and went into second. Takahito Mura took the ice right after him, but I couldn’t watch him, I had to use him and the next two skaters after him to gather up my energy for Kovtun. The room began to blur around me for some reason, but it was probably a side effect of spending around ten minutes crawling around in circles on my floor, tilting my head one too many times.

 

_Don’t make him fall. Just make him mess up all of his jumps, so they think he bombs all of his short programs….._

_You know, they’ll just see him as a skater who’ll jump up several spots in his freeskate, instead of one who constantly bombs him short programs? So, the reverse of you?_

_They don’t trust you because you can be counted on to give them false hope. Not because of your age…there’s actually logic involved in their decisions! Novel concept, isn’t it?_

“Explain 2013.” I said to no one, quelling the discussion. There was no logical explanation for 2013 Nationals…the year that started this whole mess and my desire for revenge, the year in which the Federation showed their true colors…how they only cared about Zhenya and Maxim.

 

Maxim Kovtun took the ice as I grabbed his doll and a couple of pins. His jumps were all at the beginning of his program, and the pins quickly stabbed his doll, forcing him to err on two of them. And without the jumps, all that was left was absolutely nothing at all. Terrible posture, not much artistry, and a lack of charisma.

 

But he somehow went into third place with 87.02 points.

 

* * *

 

_Just let someone else pin Sergei._

That would’ve been the best course of action, as I was still tired from ladies, but Masha didn’t condone this on anyone except Maxim and though I managed to brainwash Alenka into accepting this art, she still did not want to perform it on Sergei in particular. She was always so pigheaded about that particular matter, and I didn’t have enough energy to force her to do that in particular.

 

_Relax. They’ll see things from your point of view, okay? Don’t worry….._

I drifted off into a dreamlike haze after that, completely oblivious to the world around me sans snippets of conversation…but that didn’t matter. Voronov wasn’t in medal contention after the short program. Javier Fernandez was very likely to move up in the standings, and neither Machida nor Hanyu was likely to fall…. so all I had to do was pin Maxim. It was the obvious choice, as he sat in third and was the most vulnerable to falling.

 

_So, if the Federation stops paying attention to him, they’ll go with Pitkeev or Voronov instead of you, requiring you to pin even more people than you already are, just to get them to see the supposed error of their ways…_

_In short, everyone has to fall until you are the last one standing._

Did I want that to happen, though? Do I want everyone else to fall by the wayside, just so I can be seen? Thinking about it, and taking into account the Federation’s mindset, it was pretty much the only thing that could happen if they were to consider me. It was always about the young ones, and the fact that I was almost thirty-two was something the Federation indirectly used as an excuse not to give me the opportunities I deserved.

 

Maxim Kovtun skated to the center of the ice, and I grabbed his doll, gripping it tightly as I felt my magic stir within me. The music started, and he began to set up for his quadruple salchow. I pinned his doll hard on the takeoff, forcing him to pop it…and then the world turned to black. I didn’t know why this happened so early. Usually, I could last more than one program, provided that I rested…

 

_You’re overexerting yourself. He isn’t going to defeat Fernandez._

Just to be safe, I clenched my hand, feeling the doll in my palm. I let my other hand feel for one of the pins I prepared, grabbed it, and pushed it into the doll…or what I hoped was the doll.

 

* * *

 

“Yeah! Go, Seryozha!” someone exclaimed as I opened my eyes. It was a familiar voice, though it wasn’t Masha’s sweet, soothing one. That didn’t matter as much as what was said, however.

_What?!  No, seriously…how is that possible?!_

 

 


	14. Bloodbath

I hadn’t done enough to help them. I thought that getting both Masha and Alenka 2 Grand Prix assignments would be enough to get the Federation to care about them, but they still put all of their eggs in the baskets of the younger girls, the Radionovas and Lipnitskayas and Medvedevas of this world, while neglecting the older, experienced ones. They never understood, they never realized that with all the talent in the country, they could afford to send two different teams to Europeans and Worlds and still sweep the podiums.

 

As much as I wanted to watch them skate, I couldn’t let my guard down. Someone was bound to find it suspicious that as a grown man, I somehow had sixteen dolls in my bag. Dolls of every single skater in the ladies’ short program except for Masha and Alenka…. dolls with numerous pins stuck into them, pins which can force them to bomb… there would have been seventeen dolls in the bag, but I’d removed Adelina’s doll before the short program after remembering that she wasn’t competing.

 

With the Olympic Champion out of the way, a pair of slots on the Grand Prix had opened up, a pair of slots that didn’t go to Masha…but one of their favorites was out of their way. Alenka was in a better position, as she received two from the get-go. Pinning Nikol Gosviani’s doll after last Nationals turned out to be the right thing however, as some bad luck for her forced her to withdraw, and her slot at Rostelecom went to Masha, giving her a pair of events for the first time in her career. I was happy, as she really deserved to have them, and she did put up good fights in both events.

 

Masha was to skate fourth in the first group, and Alenka right after her. This was not going to look good for their program components score, so I had to put in some extra effort. The other girls in their warm-up group were a bunch of junior skaters. Apart from Sakhanovich, none of them qualified for the Junior Grand Prix Final. Both Pervushkina and Kayumova failed to medal in one of their events. Proklova didn’t even qualify for nationals, but she somehow got in anyways, and she had also been injured at some point…

 

_You caused her injury, didn’t you? After finished fourth last year, she was a threat, so she had to be eliminated…._

I couldn’t feel guilty over anything I’ve done. I couldn't regret anything anymore. Especially now that my powers are stronger. I did not have Alena’s natural talent, but I was trained and had better control.

 

Sasha Proklova took the ice as I pulled out her doll and some pins. There were already several stuck into the doll’s body, the pins that caused her to get injured, assigned to the hardest Russian Cup event, and err in her JGP events….

 

_How old is she, exactly? Thirteen? Fourteen? You’re cursing minors, girls who are less that half of your age! Isn’t that going a bit too far!_

It didn’t matter to me any longer. Age had no correlation with skating ability, and she was a threat to both the girl I love and my new witch. They all were. Every single girl in this competition was a threat to the futures of both Masha and Alenka, who would be treasures anywhere else, and I was going to give them a bright future, regardless of what I had to resort to.

 

The first pin went into the doll as I unleashed my energy once more and she performed her triple lutz-triple toeloop, which she then underrotated. The second pin was pushed in, and she errs on her flying camel spin. Her usual Level 3 or 4 would most definitely drop down to a Level 1 going by the look of it. Then the third pin, which makes her pop her solo triple flip..

 

_That’s enough, Kostya! Masha wouldn’t stand for going too far!_

I put away the doll as Proklova exits the ice, her expression forlorn and disappointed, as I put her doll away and pull out the one of Diana Pervushkina. She scored 51.85 points, which’d be a good score in many national championships, and even put her in the top 10 in Europeans. Not in this country, however.

 

There were a few pins in Pervushkina’s doll. All they did was cause her to finish fifth in her only JGP event, which I watched on TV. I stuck the first pin into her doll once she starts, unleashing more of my energy. She misses her flip, but she’s inexplicably able to add a triple toeloop into it.

 

_NO!_

 

I couldn’t let her land her lutz and overtake Masha and Alenka in any way. I knew from observation that she was mistake-prone to begin with, but I had to play things safe. The Federation had to see that she was the worst junior lady they sent out to the JGP circuit, even though her results would have been good in any other nation… and she’s setting up for her lutz. I grab another pin and shove it into the doll, causing her to execute a single jump on the wrong edge instead of a triple lutz. Now that was sufficient. Pervushkina scores 50.17 points and goes into second place with her mistake-filled program. I didn’t bother with Kayumova’s doll after realizing that she too, was mistake-prone and did not have the scores of Masha, instead choosing to just simply watch. I had to save my energy for what was important after all. Alsu Kayumova made mistakes on her triple flip, fell on the underrotated triple toeloop in her triple-triple combination, and from the look of it, failed to obtain levels on some of her non-jump elements and scored 44.86 points. I breathed a sigh of relief. At least, I made the right choice to save my energy for when I really needed it.

 

_Remember, there’s still Julia to deal with._

Next up was Masha, and I found myself fearful for her. I couldn’t bear to watch her throughout, and satisfied myself with quick looks instead. There she was, gliding on the ice in her one-shouldered black and silver dress...and I looked down again as she started to jump. The music kept playing, and at first, I tried to block out the sounds I could hear, though I did catch the sound of two landings, making me sigh with relief. No, I did not want to jinx Masha, when I helped put her in such a good position…being this much of a headcase was not going to help, so I forced myself to look up and watch her, smiling as she looked up at me. Apart from a strange fall on her double axel, her program turned out beautifully. She nailed her triple-triple combination, the triple toe-triple toe, even though it wasn’t as hard at the lutz-toes and flip-toes of the others. Most other nations would love to have her; not many European nations had skaters on Masha’s level.

 

Unfortunately, this was Russia, and our Federation didn’t care about her at all.

 

Masha scored 60.59 points and went into first. Alenka skated to the center of the ice as I pulled out a doll at random, before tossing it back in I did not see any reason to force anyone to withdraw, as channeling so much dark energy over such a short period of time exhausted me and wasn’t too good for my health at my current level.

 

Alenka was electrifying. I’ve known for long that she was always an amazing performer, someone who’d be a great actress. While most girls were graceful, she was theatrical instead. Tonight was no different, and she landed all of her jumps without falling, including the triple-triple. Plus, she’s a former World silver medalist, so that said something about her skill level. Like Masha, any nation except for Russia would be glad to have her.

 

Unfortunately, in Russia, she was not good enough, and considered too old to rely on, even though she was only twenty-four. She scored 67.99 points, a score which I disagreed with. Everyone knew that Nationals scores were typically higher than usual, but the degree to which that applied depended on one’s standing in the eyes of the Federation. Alenka? They definitely lowballed her performance; she even obtained a higher score in NHK than in here. I would have given her at least a 70 for that performance. But then again, she skated in the first group, which was to her disadvantage. She still managed to go into first place though, and Sima Sakhnovich started skating.

 

Sakhanovich was the only girl in this group who could serve as a threat. being the current world junior silver medalist, the winner of both of her JGP events, silver medalist at the final, and sixth last year. There were no pins on her clean, blue-clothed doll.

 

_Yet._

Her music started and I took out her doll and some pins, taking the time to conceal it under one of my spare jackets as not to attract attention. What mattered was her second half anyway, as I knew her program was backloaded, having watched it three times already. Her combination spin and step sequence occur without a hitch, as did her triple flip. Quickly, I stabbed two pins simultaneously into the doll’s cloth body. She fell on her combination triple toe, flutzed, and stepped out of her double axel. She scored 59.21 points, and went into third. I started to breathe heavily. I might have been stronger, but it took a lot of energy from within me to utilize voodoo magic, and Zhenya hasn’t yet taught me how to utilize it verbally, like Morozov did.

 

_But she’s only a single point behind Masha._

I couldn’t dwell on negative emotions. What mattered now was the second group, and how they’d do. The group consisted of Polina Korobeynikova, Elizaveta Iushenko, Ekaterina Bayanova, Julia Lipnitskaya, Maria Sotskova, and Maria Stavitskaya. Except for Lipnitskaya and Sotskova, none of them were likely threats, given their tendencies to make mistakes based on previous performances Zhenya made me watch. Besides, pinning six dolls would have been too sadistic, too suspicious and too taxing on my body.

 

I pulled out the two dolls of the biggest threats and stare at them for a bit. There was a part of me that wanted to throw them away, or even burn them. That was always the nobler choice, the less scary one, but I ignored it. Only a pussy would back out, and I was helping Masha and Alena with them, and that was all that mattered. I leaned back and watched the other girls, allowing myself to relax before I my powers were once again put to the test. It was definitely relieving to see that Polina Korobeynikova had made errors again. The Polina Curse, I thought as her score came up. Lower than Masha’s of course. Iushenko on the other hand, did better than I expected.

 

Even with the minor bobble on her double axel and no triple-triple combination, Iushenko went into third, only .48 of a point behind Masha. I made a mental note to remember her for the free program. I did not have to mind Bayanova, the next skater, though, as she made enough errors for me to be confident about her.

 

_It’s time, Kostya. It’s time._

Julia Lipnitskaya hit the ice, and I had to focus. I needed to make her commit mistakes, make the Federation think that she was losing her jumps as she grew taller and older, make them have reservations about her, the nation’s former golden girl, after her sub-par Grand Prix circuit and horrid, by Russian standards, free skate at the final. A hand clamped over my shoulder gently, and a familiar person sat beside me. My mentor, Zhenya Rukavitsyn.

 

“Still holding up? Masha and Alenka just left to get some drinks,” he said, smiling thoughtfully as his eyes travelled down, towards the doll-shaped lump under the jacket I had placed over my lap. Under that, as we both knew, was a dark blonde doll dressed in a red outfit. The music started and I grabbed a pin and stuck it into her doll as she performs her triple lutz-triple toeloop combination. It looked clean to the naked, untrained eye but to mine and Zhenya’s, it was going to be marked with an edge call for sure, and perhaps an underrotation. A sharp pain hit my chest, and I took deep breaths and shook my head, before recovering. Zhenya handed me a bottle of soda, which I accepted, taking gulps out of it as Julia spun without error. When I got back to the doll, she was already starting on her step sequence. I channeled more energy and pinned, and she briefly stumbles, though she was able to get back on track…maybe I was getting too tired. I grabbed one last pin as she sets up her double axel. Maybe I made her underrotate it, maybe I didn’t. I wasn’t able to see, as I collapsed on Zhenya’s lap afterwards.

 

_Is this how you should help them?! By cursing everyone else?_

My mentor’s hands shook me awake, and placed the soda bottle in my hands. To anyone who did not know what was going on, we looked like best friends, one of whom was trying to keep the other awake. Any reservations I had were erased as Julia Lipnitskaya’s score came up. It was an unusual one that put her behind Alenka - which was a rare thing. There was still Maria Sotskova to go, however. She won the Junior Grand Prix final last year, but finished fourth this year. However, that did not take anything away from her accomplishments, as she did win gold and silver at both of her JGP events this year, and would’ve won bronze at Junior Worlds if she didn’t injure herself.

 

_If I didn’t injure her… and why must the only two girls who are any sort of threat to Masha and Alenka go one after the other?!_

I pinned her doll, her ridiculously-dressed doll that took up a quite an amount of our costume budget to clothe, as my eyelids flutter once more. I didn’t know how long I could keep going at this point. She erred on her triple lutz, and Zhenya rubbed my back in response.  I willed myself to slide another pin into the doll which made her botch the landing of the triple toe right after it.  Zhenya helped me get a third one into it just before she started on her double axel, which looked alright to my tired eyes. I laid my head on my coach’s shoulder, not having the energy to ask whether I had channeled enough power into that last jump for it to at least be underrotated. My body and my head hurt so much, it was a miracle that my stomach did not feel sick, like it once did when I was starting out.

 

“I’m not the one who’s so far away, when I feel the snake bite enter my veins…” the familiar sound of my phone ringing woke me up. Zhenya answered it for me, however, quickly instructing whoever was on the other side to come and get me. From the tone of his voice, he had to be speaking to Masha. After all, Alenka was probably with the other guys, perhaps for a chance to see Sergei Voronov. I wasn’t an idiot, and I knew how she felt for that guy, but in the end, he was an obstacle, and she had to understand that.

 

“C’mon Kostya, I better let you rest. You’re a wreck.” Masha’s gentle voice coaxed as she shook my shoulder, just as the ice resurfacing finished. Zhenya helped me up, and my love took away the jacket and the dolls on my lap, placing them into my bag and zipping it up. She then took my hand and led me out of the stands. I had to rest, she told me, for my free program and whatever it was I was supposed to do the next day, something she insisted not being a part of, and I realized that she was right. If I had to do what I had to do, I couldn’t be in this messed-up state, I had to rest.

 

Masha ended up driving me back to the hotel, taking me up to our room and allowing me to sleep. When I woke up, she broke the news. She had ended up in ninth after the short program, while Alenka ended up in fifth. My efforts had not been in vain after all.

 

_Sort of._

Now, she was driving me back to the stadium, fretting over how I was going to do in my free skate, just because, in her terms, I chose to stupidly waste my energy performing voodoo.

 

_You’ll thank me later, Masha. Without me…they’d forget about you._

* * *

 

I needed to pace myself properly this time. I couldn’t run out of energy towards the end, just like yesterday. Thankfully, I wasn’t skating after performing any sort of dark art unlike yesterday, when I had to skate my free program while already exhausted and drained of energy even after a nap, and dropped to fourth place from my short program standing of second. Unfortunately, Maxim won, and both Sergei and Adian were able to overtake me due to Alenka refusing to curse the former, thus giving another reason for the Federation to think that that I should be retiring at this point.

 

But I wasn’t going to give up on myself, and I wasn’t going to let the Federation believe that their mindset was right, and that abandoning Masha and Alenka was anywhere near a good idea. I would do anything to make sure of those two things.

 

The first group, which consisted of Alsu Kayumova, Maria Gorokhova, Diana Pervushkina, Polina Korobeynikova, Alexandra Proklova, and Ekaterina Bayanova, was currently warming up. And I needed to decide whom among these girls was the best choice to voodoo.

 

Kayumova and Gorokhova were probably out of the question, as they were both around fifteen points behind Masha and I can’t see either of them overtaking her. Pervushkina seemed to have some sort of resistance to this art for reasons I do not yet know, as she was still able to execute her triple flip-triple toeloop, but she did pop her flutz and was mistake-prone. Korobeynikova and Proklova were the most obvious choices. There was always the chance that either would pull it off, as the former’s Europeans outing three years ago and the latter’s Nationals performance last year showed. If they skated like they did during those times, they would most likely overtake my girls. And I cannot let that happen.

 

Kayumova, Gorokhova, and Pervushkina were all breaks for me to gather up my energy and focus. If I was to last, I had to be wise. In this group, I had to save it to use on Korobeynikova and make the Federation realize that her skate in Europeans two years ago was just a fluke, and that she was just another fallen star. I had to save my energy for Sasha Proklova as well, and make them see that she was just lucky at last year’s Nationals. I played with the doll on my lap as Alsu Kayumova’s score was announced, a 103.90 in her free skate, and a total score of 148.74. I looked up at the score nervously. Masha’s international personal best free skate score was only a few points higher than that. I knew that scores were bound to be inflated to some degree, they always were, but then again, the degree to which the scores were marked up depended on how much the Federation preferred a particular skater, and Masha wasn’t one of their favorites. She was too old in their eyes, past improving, even though I saw her getting better each day.

 

_Conserve your energy for Korobeynikova and Proklova, Kostya. Don’t repeat what you did yesterday. Getting sick two days in a row is bound to make anyone suspicious, especially after looking alright now._

I allowed Gorokhova and Pervushkina to skate without doing anything, instead taking out the special soda that Zhenya packed for me. I took a few sips, as per his advice, while I watched. Neither of the girls managed to get near Masha’s best international score. It was now Polina Korobeynikova’s turn, and I readied my pins, taking a few deep breaths as the music started. I then began to pin her doll, sticking them into every single uncovered spot without looking up, making sure to take deep breaths. I knew I was being irrational and paranoid, she already made mistakes in her short and was bound to make more…but she ccouldn’t move up. The Federation shouldn’t remember her, the girl whose star exploded in Euros three years ago, they had to think she peaked at sixteen and is was declining.

 

I felt a sharp pain in my chest as I stuck the last pin, and I almost dropped the doll and risked exposing myself. I hastily arranged the doll back under my jacket as I sat up, waiting for the scores to come up. I almost fell out of my seat when it did. Like a charm, the voodoo caused Polina Korobeynikova to slide into last place. I might have strengthened the Federation’s belief that there was indeed a Polina Curse, from what they were seeing. I quickly put back the doll and take out Sasha Proklova’s as she hit the ice. Taking a few gulps of the specially-prepared soda laced with energy gel, I felt some of my energy return as she started skating. Instead of looking up at my progress, I chose to keep my eyes on my lap, turning on my phone for good measure in order to disguise my efforts, and started unleashing more voodoo energy once more. My right hand started to tremble as I stuck the third pin, but I chose to keep going, sticking two more in, this time more slowly as I transferred more energy. It would be worth it when the results came out...

 

_Save it, Kostya! No more for this group!_

Sasha Proklova managed to come out in first, but with a score lower than Masha’s personal best. Accepting it, I put away the doll and zipped my bag shut. The camera was coming as the last skater of the group started, and I wasn’t going to allow myself to get caught doing this on TV. Unlike the short program, this was being broadcasted, so I had to keep up my facade. Instead, I kicked back once again and relaxed, making sure to take as much soda as possible, before Masha’s group started.

 

_Good luck, Masha. I’ll make sure of that. I love you…._

She was to skate third in the second group. After her were Serafima Sakhanovich, Elisaveta Iushenko, and Natalia Ogoreltseva, and before her were Maria Stavitskaya and Maria Sotskova.

 

_Jeez, that’s too many Marias. I’m going to make sure that my Masha would be the best of them._

The Federation loved Sakhanovich and Sotskova, so they were definitely my targets. Between Iushenko and Ogoreltseva, the latter’s short program score was more worrying. As for Statvitskaya…. I supposed that it was best to avoid pinning her and build up my energy for Sotskova, as well as for Julia later on. The camera was moving towards me again, and I sat still until the end of her program. She had made mistakes by herself, though she beat Sasha’s score.

 

Quickly, I took out Sotskova’s doll, still ridiculously-dressed, and hid it under my jacket. Thankfully, the cameraman was away when she started her program, allowing me to pin her and consequently, she made a mistake on her triple lutz. Unfortunately, he came back three seconds later as the fourteen-year-old skater glided in front of me, so I had to stop, and wasn’t able to do anything, even though I desperately want to. Lucky for her, she ended up way above the others.

 

It was Masha’s turn now, and I couldn’t watch. I couldn’t bear to watch an entire program about the two of us, knowing the full story of voodoo and lies, deception and lowered costume budgets all in the name of dark magic. The shirt she was wearing as her costume was the one she removed from my closet on the day she found out my secret, a year and a half ago…

 

_Masha…. do you forgive me? Do you truly love me, after following me into the dark?_

In her program, Masha performed two triple lutzes, two triple toeloops, one triple loop, and two double axels. I threw the red rose I bought earlier towards her, hoping she would get it, and she did. Her layout wasn’t a bad one, and her performance capabilities were superior to most of the other girls here, owing to the fact that she was experienced and had her own style. But we were in Russia and the Federation preferred different things and younger skaters, and she went into second place with a 175.33. I cheer for her, breaking out into a smile. She did pull it off after all, save for a few minor mistakes.

 

Sima Sakhnovich began her program when the camera found me again, perhaps for commentators to talk about the previous skater’s boyfriend, and I couldn’t help keep Masha up in the standings, couldn’t help her place in the top ten and stay there at this rate…. and I had to intensively pin both Iushenko and Ogoreltseva in order to make up for lost opportunities.

 

The cameraman finally left me, having found a much more interesting target as I pull out my pins and the dolls of both Iushenko and Ogoreltseva. I was running out of chances. I had to do this, or Masha could very likely end up outside of the top ten.

 

The first pin went into Iushenko’s doll with renewed energy coursing through the veins of my hand, causing her to fall on her triple lutz. I pushed the second pin in, and she errs on the landing of her double axel. I couldn’t stop, not until I ensured that Masha would at least comfortably sit in the top ten. The third pin went into her doll and I pressed down hard, hearing a fall on the ice but not looking up to see. I could stop now, but I can’t risk her regrouping and defeating Masha Fourth pin in, then a fall on her triple flip. Fifth pin, another fall. All these falls were making me dizzy once again, but I stuck a sixth pin, causing her final fall.

 

Elizaveta Iushenko has fallen five times and executed only one clean jumping pass, keeping her a good distance from Masha in the standings, as she went into ninth place. Now, it was the turn of Natalia Ogoreltseva, and I wasn’t about to let her go clean either, especially not with that risky short program score. This former counterpart of Sakhanovich and Medvedeva had bombed one of her JGP events last season…thanks to yours truly. I couldn’t force all of the batch of girls from last year to fall by the wayside out of fear that things would look suspicious, I just had to select a few…. and she happened to be one of them. If only it was Zhenia…

 

I pushed the first pin into her doll, forcing more energy out, resulting in a fall from the executed triple flip. She rebounded however, when my hand started shaking again, managing to land a triple lutz-double toeloop-double loop, another triple lutz, and a triple loop. Using my better hand, I grabbed another pin from the canister, shoving it into her doll as hard as I could, with as much power as I could channel, making her fall on a downgraded double axel. I was tired, very tired from intensely using my voodoo powers to curse two skaters in a row with such effort. To my relief, she erred on her triple salchow before popping and twofooting her loop.

 

She wasn’t going to defeat Masha either, I was sure of it. It only took a few minutes for me to find out that she didn’t. Ogoreltseva went into fourth as the zamboni took the ice and I took a few sips of the drink once again before pulling my bag to my lap, staring at a group of five dolls that I had placed together.

 

_The final group..._

Alenka was to skate first in the group, followed by all the Federation’s darlings, including their dear Julia. All of them very good victims, though it would be suspicious if all of them were to bomb. I had to wait until next year to see for sure who were the best to bring down…except for Julia. She was definitely a given. I just had to wait and see who…. else…. to….

 

_Why did you think intensively cursing two people in a row was a good idea? You were very lucky that nobody was close enough to see you, that no cameras caught you…but then, no one’s going to call an ambulance for you…_

Applause awakened me, and I looked up at the scoreboard in horror as I saw that Alenka had somehow slipped under Maria Sotskova and Sima. The person who was now skating on the ice was setting up for a triple toeloop, and was wearing a purple dress. I grab the appropriate doll, guessing that it was Liza, and jabbed a pin into it, causing the girl on the ice to double it, only to tack another triple toeloop onto the end. My head was pounding however, and I needed to gather up all of my strength for Lipnitskaya. She had to fall from grace, she had to bomb this program…but my head and my body were growing fatigued, and I had to go for some space, away from the rink. Getting up, I made my way outside the stands to the corridors, nearly colliding with a familiar, dark-haired girl with pale eyes. It was Alenka, who caught me in time and steadied me. Her hair was down in curls, and she wore her red costume under a black jacket with the letters “AL” in glittery silver studs over the right chest and a small glittery Russian flag on the left sleeve. Undoubtedly, a gift from Morozov.

 

“Kostya, you sure you’re fine?” She asked me, shaking me back and forth twice. I nodded, smiling as I looked at her, trying to make sure I looked alright enough for her not to tell Masha anything. Laughing a bit, she let go of me and slapped me on my back twice, and I realized that I smelled a bit of alcohol once again. Was it because of her own disappointing result? Or was it because of last night’s debacle in the Men’s Free? I turned around and headed back to the stands, just as Julia started skating. I hurried back to my seat, her doll still in my pocket, and she lands both a triple lutz-triple toeloop and a double axel-triple toeloop-double toeloop.

 

_NO!_

I quickly grabbed her doll and stuffed pins into it, two at a time, not knowing or caring about what jumps she was landing. All that mattered was that she had to do terribly and fall from grace, and I didn’t care to what extent. I was doing this all to help Masha and Alenka…. right?

 

_Stop doubting yourself! KEEP PINNING JULIA! HELP THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE, KOSTYA!_

The world was a blur. The world had turned into a blur of whites and blacks and jumps and spins as my head and body burned and screamed for me to stop, clearly drained. I had no clue who was even on the ice, they all looked the same, the endless parade of little girls in pretty boxes…and there were even more of them coming up the ranks, there was an army of little girls in pretty boxes and I was the only soldier who can fight them, armies of Gubanovas and Nugumanovas and god knows who else, and I had to stop them from taking over, stop the Federation from perpetuating its terrible mindset and habits. I had to do this, to ensure our future. I needed to improve my stamina, for I was going to need more pins next year…perhaps even learn how to cast voodoo verbally, like Morozov could, like Alenka could…I had to get stronger….

 

The last thing I could recall was Masha and Alenka helping me up, and Zhenya slowly driving me back to his apartment in his car.

 

Alenka ended the night in seventh. Masha ended the night in eighth, one place away from each other. Both of them were assigned to go to the Winter Universiade and were named as alternates for Europeans this year. I don’t know if they were assigned to Universiade because the Federation actually realized that they existed or that most of the girls above them were too young for it…. but it was a step.

 

A very small step, but still a step up the ladder.

 

 


	15. Remember Me

_Radionova, Tuktamysheva, and Pogorilaya top 3 in Euros SP…._

Why weren’t the dolls ready!? Why did Kostya insist on us pinning the men, but kept putting off the ladies?! What did he have against Sergei, and why didn’t he let me pin any of the girls, who were in fact, the elephants in the room?!

 

Didn’t he understand that _I_  still wanted to get out of the country and skate, and had a much harder path to take in order to do so? At least he was guaranteed two Grand Prix events next year, with comparatively few Russian men on the field. On the other hand, I would be damn lucky to end up with that many, and Masha would be lucky to even get out of the country. Call me pessimistic, but that was exactly what the Federation wanted for so long, and now they were close to realizing their dream of a ladies’ team entirely under twenty.

 

The free skate was happening now, and I could defeat each and every single girl who had skated by wide margins. I would be the star of any other nation, an alluring, charming magical girl and former world silver medalist…but I’m in Russia, where the Federation is just silently begging me to retire and only cares about a bunch of little girls. Luck wasn’t on my family’s side however, as I’d tried my best to trace back my ancestors, looking for at least one who wasn’t originally from here. No such luck for me, especially with the 25% chance that a person from St. Petersburg was bound to have at least Finnish ancestry

 

_Who got the entire program back on its feet after Doronina?! Who got Russia two spots for 2010, won World Juniors in 2009, and medalled at Worlds in 2012?! I won the short program that year too! I could’ve been a world champion that year, and yet you do this to me?!_

_Why should I care about you! I could kill all of you, if I wanted to!_

Since when did I become so violent? Why and when did I develop such a propensity for violent thoughts? I shook my head, not knowing the answers to the questions I so badly wanted answers for, yet at the same time, wanted to shake off and ignore. All I had to do was curse three skaters, and make them regret putting me aside for children. Before I could do anything as the final group took the ice, someone started knocking on my door.

 

_It’s Sergei, and he’s here to visit me, for he… Damn, Alenka! What the hell are you thinking about?!_

“Oh, it’s not locked?” Kostya asked, opening my door and dropping off a bag, seeing me in just my black T-shirt with holes, and my neon green shorts. “You wouldn’t mind a guest to join you in drowning your sorrows?” he continued, smiling at me kindly, with a hint of mischief in his blue eyes.

 

“Sure, I guess?” I answered, disappointment rising in my voice, as the man who came was not Sergei, whom I now realized was still in Sweden. I guess I missed him that much, I mean, I haven’t been drinking anything, even though I felt the urge to. I promised Masha that I would cut down on my alcohol intake and so far, my skating seemed to have improved this season. She really cared, and I appreciated that from her. Still, it would have been nice to have something…

 

“It’s a shame, don’t you agree?” he asked, taking a seat on my sofa and brushing a lock of my black hair away from my face. My hair wasn’t always black. It used to be naturally chestnut a few years ago, but I felt that black suited me a whole lot better.

 

“What?” I asked, moving closer to him as the warmup ended and Anna Pogorilaya took the ice. If only I could influence her  through the screen, force her to bomb…so she’d be dropped and I’d be there instead. As if he read my thoughts, Kostya dropped a doll into my hand. It was blonde-haired and wearing a ridiculous orange and yellow feathered costume, complete with bright blue patches over where the nipples were supposed to be, and armpit-length red gloves. I enjoyed wearing crazy costumes myself, but not ones _that_ ugly.

 

_Perfect._

“....how you could probably defeat every single person here…. yet you’re stuck on this sofa with me, watching this mess unfold….” he rambled, as Pogorilaya landed a triple lutz-triple toeloop and a triple loop-triple salchow sequence. She could jump, that’s for sure, yet she has the charm and artistic skills of a kumquat. If I were there, the audience would be drawn into my skate, not bored out of their minds like I was, watching her unchanging facial expression and generic movements.

 

_I should be there. I’ll show you that I should be there!_

Somehow, words fly out of my mouth again as she spins, even though I doubted that they would have any impact on her…it was only the TV screen after all. I had to be in Sweden to work the magic, forcing her to bomb and proving myself to the Federation…and watching Sergei and cheering him on.

 

“Alenka, are you sure that’s enough? That they won’t forget you?” Kostya asked, grabbing my hand and looking into my eyes, using his mysterious tone that I couldn’t find myself resisting. I didn’t know why my head was starting to feel light as he spoke and why he was reacting like this, asking such questions out of the blue, and looking at me so intensely…unless the hex did work over screens, when in the proximity of other powerful people, as Zhenya told me that it was one way that magic could grown in power. Why couldn’t I resist him when he spoke to me that way? Was it really something guys used to get their way around girls? I giggled at the thought as I imagined Seryozha using it on me.

 

_Yeah! Just stay with me every single time we’re stuck at home, and it’ll all work out!_

Pogorilaya was setting up for a triple flip. I tightened my grip on her doll and Kostya as I begin to talk, hoping that enough power had been generated to reach her, hear our message and mess up on the flip.

 

_Also, could you fall on every single other jump you do? Thanks…._

Thankfully, she erred on it, and excitement rose in my voice as she set up for her lutz, as I realized that I could force all three of the girls at Euros to bomb now, if I just stayed here and kept talking. They would see that people under the age of twenty couldn’t be trusted, that I could’ve won this year if they gave me the chance.

 

Pogorilaya ended up making a mistake on her triple lutz and began to set up for her double axel when someone knocked on the door once again, breaking my concentration. Who could it be this time anyway?

 

“Kostya? Alenka? Are you in here?!” Masha exclaimed from outside as Kostya took the doll from my hands and stuffed it into his bag, letting go of me. He got up and answered the door as Pogorilaya landed a clean double axel. My head started spinning, and I blinked a few times, rubbing my forehead to ease my dizziness. Why was I feeling like this? I had not drank anything, or taken pills for that matter… I looked back on the screen, contemplating whether to force Anna to mess up on her succeeding jumps.

_Or not, given Masha’a distaste of this act. Can’t she just see that we’re leveling the playing field to give ourselves fighting chances to compete internationally?_

_Hey…don’t you…oppose this…right? The real you does, not the brainwashed puppet… Since when have you become so…vengeful? Snap out of it, Alenka!_

I lay down across the couch, my head pounding as I decided against doing anything, and my thoughts a blur. Why did I suddenly remember mist? Such alluring, hypnotizing voices of men? Whose exactly were they? When I tried to make something out of them however, I felt my mind fighting back, as if swirling mist was enveloping hidden depths that held things best unknown.

 

“Alenka, are you alright?” Masha asked, her voice concerned. I looked up at her as she shed off her plaid parka and her scarf, sitting down next to me. I didn’t know what to say, except perhaps to ask for a drink, which I sorely needed to ease the pain of my headache. As if she knew what was coming however, Masha rubbed my forehead.

 

“Hey, don’t you ask for any vodka tonight. You don’t look well, and I don’t want you to get any worse. How about some hot chocolate instead?” she asked, giving me a look that was both serious and kind. I pushed myself up and shrugged, thinking that there was no harm in taking something else. After all, Masha had warned me that taking alcohol after practicing magic had the possibility of causing awful nightmares, and I sure as hell didn’t want to deal with one tonight, with my headache and the guilt I was starting to feel once again, mixed with my angry, vengeful thoughts. Those were usually the same things I felt, and the same feelings I had after nights of working my magic, and I did not know why.

 

 


	16. The Raven's Conflict

The second I returned to my hotel room after the medal-awarding ceremony, my phone started ringing. Confused, I hastily shed off my team jacket before picking it up, assuming that it was just someone calling me to congratulate me on my bronze medal at Europeans this year, as the number that flashed on the screen wasn’t registered. Now, I was happy that I did earn a medal, but what I wasn’t too pleased about was my rough free skate and my axel error in the short program, which I did not expect. Eteri had made me run through my programs numerous times, and I was pretty confident going into the competition.

 

“Hello? Who is this?” I asked, sitting down on the couch as I kicked off my sneakers and pulling my legs up. There were a few moments of silence, then a deep breath, before the person on the other end replied.

 

“...are you Sergei Voronov?” the person on the other end asked. It sounded like a female’s voice, but it wasn’t a very familiar one.

 

“Yes? And you are…?” I asked, hoping that I hadn’t gained a crazy stalker from Europeans, or something along those lines, although if someone really was stalking me, they probably wouldn’t be calling me unless they somehow obtained my number.

 

“....Maria Artemieva? Listen, I need to tell you something,” she replied, her tone serious and grave. Maria Artemieva… Kostya Menshov’s girlfriend. I remembered her from Rostelecom and Finlandia this season, but I didn’t know her well, and I didn’t see any reason for her to contact me.

 

“Why?” I asked, trying to make sense of what was going on. It was a very odd situation I was in, but I wanted to find out what it was exactly.

 

“I need to show you something. Can we meet when you leave Stockholm?” she asked, seemingly withholding details. I was trying to figure out why she seemed so evasive, as if she was hiding something from me. But from her tone and the fact that she, of all people, called me, I deduced that it had to be something important. I couldn’t see any reason for her to call me at all, unless it had something to with whatever I was assuming that she was hiding…

 

“Yes.” I answer, as she started to tell me to meet her at her apartment in St. Petersburg after a few days, and made me promise not to tell anyone about the conversation, or about what I was about to know for that matter.

 

* * *

 

I had no idea about the mess I was getting into. At all.

 

I did show up at her apartment the day the day I got back from Euros, the day she told me to meet her. I found her sitting at her dining table, wearing a simple white dress and holding a small object in her hands. I was about to ask her what was going on when she stabbed the object with a pin.

 

Instantly, I felt a sharp pain coming from my stomach and almost collapsed, but I wasn’t focused on that. My primary focus was on how on earth she managed to do that that to me, as it was like she’d managed to injure me just by stabbing that human-shaped object in her hands, whatever substitute she was using for my body….

 

“I’m sorry! I…” she began, her expression apologetic and bothered, before I cut her off.

 

“What did you do to me?!” I exclaim, trying to run out the door. Was she doing what I was thinking she was doing? Was she trying to murder me through some demented proxy? I didn’t know if she was doing this to other people, but there was always the possibility...

 

“....you’ve heard the rumors surrounding Morozov, correct?” she asked, bringing up the name of the man who happened to be my former coach, before I transferred to Eteri. How on earth was Morozov involved anyway? I did know of the rumors surrounding him, however, considering that I’ve actually trained under him for a year. Everyone knew that he was a notorious playboy who had the tendency to get into relationships with some of his female students…and there was talk, most likely made-up, about him having particular powers as well…not that I thought them to be true in the first place.

 

“Trysts and voodoo, mostly. What does…” I begin, trying to figure out what the minefield of rumors surrounding my former coach had to do with this situation I was put in…unless the voodoo bit was real, and that was why Maria had brought me here and the reason why she’d been able to injure me just like that. I stepped backwards, towards the door. I had to leave this room and call the police, or someone else, but they’d think I was crazy… yet something really was up, and proof was in the hands of the girl sitting at the table. The girl who might very well be a dark magic practitioner, contrary to her appearance.

 

She wasn’t going to give up however, as she stood up and walked towards me, grabbing my wrist and giving me a look that meant business. I stopped, nodding, and she dropped the object she was holding into my open hand. Said object was humanoid in shape, as I suspected, and it took the form of a small, stuffed doll with messy blond hair, some “facial scruff” attached, and dressed in an all-black, feathered costume.

 

_My Danse Macabre costume._

There were a few pins stuck into the doll, and there was some sort of stitching on its back. I turned it over to check out what it was, only to see one word stitched in thick, gold thread.

 

_Voronov._

“Rukavitsyn was Morozov’s teacher, and he also taught…a few of his students this particular art…” she spilled, as I tried to think of some form of excuse for me to leave this room, any excuse which’ll get me out of here with this doll so I can report her to the police. Behind that beautiful face was a potentially dangerous woman, someone who could easily turn into a serial killer with such knowledge of the dark arts...

 

“I’m not going to kill you, Sergei! I just need you to help me!” she exclaimed, desperation rising in her voice, grabbing my wrist once again. It’s as if she could read my emotions and thoughts, but she could have very well been deceiving me into staying.

 

“Why?” I ask, trying to break loose. Her grip was strong, and she was a tall girl, so it wasn’t exactly easy to do so.

 

“You trained under Morozov at the same time as…Alena Leonova, correct?” she asked, finally mentioning a name that wasn’t Morozov or her coach. I raised an eyebrow. How was Alenka involved?

 

“Yes?” I answer, trying to figure out what this has to do with anything, as the two of us were on good terms back when we both trained under Morozov, and even after I left for Eteri, although we haven’t been in touch as much after she left for St. Petersburg. She did have a tendency to act a bit oddly around me at times, that I could say. I always knew her to be outgoing and loud, but there were moments when she was uncharacteristically bashful, especially whenever I tried to help her with her run-throughs, or whenever I took her out after her particularly trying sessions with Morozov. She was also rather moody towards him, more than the others were… but stubbornness was something she naturally had, and weren’t all girls over the age of thirteen moody to different degrees anyway?

 

“Did you notice anything… unusual? About her behavior, that is?” she asked, looking at me steadily. I blink, trying not to make eye contact. For all I knew, she was trying to hypnotize me or at least, influence me.

 

“Um… does being weirdly shy around me at times and having mood swings count?” I answered, trying to figure out what Alenka, voodoo and Maria all had to do with each other…. unless Alenka’s mood swings were somehow connected to the effects Morozov’s voodoo, and he was influencing her with the dark arts, maybe even corrupting her mind and sanity. Perhaps that was exactly why she left. Only she left him for Rukavitsyn, another practitioner…effectively trading one maze of insanity for another. Did she have dark powers as well? I shuddered at the thought of Alenka practicing voodoo magic. I should have confronted her before she left Moscow, asked her, tried to help her in some way….

 

A part of me really wanted to save her from him… but I couldn’t let my mind get caught up in possibilities just yet. What if she really did have magic and was out to eliminate me? No…that wasn’t like Alenka at all. Who knew how much she was influenced? In addition, the madman also coached both Maria and her boyfriend, so there was a large possibility that they were all involved in his insane voodoo plot in some way or another, and they all had to be saved…

 

“Does voodoo have negative psychological effects?” I finally asked. This was all a bit too much to take in. First, magic actually existed, then somehow Alenka got caught up in this mess. She had stayed with Morozov a year longer than I did, so being under his influence must have done something. Was I having problems that I did not know about? No, this couldn’t be happening…

 

“...yes, but we’ll get to that later. Did you feel anything…strange? During your programs at Euros, that is?” she asked, looking away from me and staring at the table instead.

 

I tried to recall my programs, and all that really came to mind were the strange errors I committed. I’d popped my axel in the short and singled my salchow in the long, along with a few other errors towards the end. I’d been attributing them to stamina problems and lack of focus, but… what if those particular errors had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with that doll in my hands? Had the fate of my programs been lying in the hands of a trio of dark magic practitioners?

 

“So you forced me… to err in my programs?!” I exclaimed. Magic couldn’t be real. It was only something that existed in stories, and in the minds of small children and gullible people, and I was neither a child nor gullible. But then again, there was no other way to explain this mess, nothing else that could somehow explain everything that’s happened…

 

“I’m sorry, Sergei…. but that’s partially true. Me in the short, and Kostya in the long. Alenka refused to have anything to do with cursing you in particular. I never wanted to do this, but I have to bide my time and find a way to save both of them from themselves…” Maria confessed, staring at the floor. She clearly looked distraught, as if she did not want to have anything to do with it. I placed my hands on both her shoulders and turned her around to face me.

 

“Why?! Why would you want me to err in my programs?! Why…it’s not just me, it’s almost everyone else on the team! Do you enjoy watching us fail?!” I yelled, recalling both Adian’s and Maxim’s errors, errors that could be chalked up to debut nerves and inconsistency but could possibly be attributed to dark magic. Perhaps it might have also encompassed Pogorilaya’s, as well as Ilinykh’s and Zhiganshin’s and Stolbova’s and Klimov’s free programs as well. Were we all puppets dancing on strings, like our dolls, all subject to the whims of insane puppetmasters?

 

“No I don’t, just hear me out! Kostya sees it as revenge against the Federation for his snub at Europeans and Worlds two years ago, as well as payback for their mentality! Harm the favorites in an effort to force the Fed to change their mentality. Younger equals better for them, Sergei…haven’t you noticed!” she answered, trying to get her point across. Kostya…he was behind it? This was weird, as I always knew him to be friendly, funny and mild-mannered, from the times we’ve talked. I did remember that he got a bronze medal at Nationals three years ago, yet wasn’t given any international assignments, having been passed over for 5th placed Maxim Kovtun, something that surprised me at that time. Was this what made him so desperate? “I never wanted to do this, but I was forced to, so that I could curb him, and Alenka… I don’t think she’s even that aware that a single thing we’re doing is wrong. She’s a victim of this mentality as well, as she herself wants to compete. Plus, she’s easily suggestible at times for reasons I can assure are unnatural, from what I’ve seen! I can’t let them descend even further into this mess…” she continued, looking up at me.

 

“But… I’m old! I’m not even the enemy here! Remember 2010? Artem? I know what it feels like to be passed over, Maria…but I sure didn’t think of performing voodoo on Artem!” I said the first thing on my mind, which I felt sounded extremely stupid. Yes, I was twenty-seven, but did that have to be what first came out? I shook my head, trying to suppress a brief chuckle that would have ruined the atmosphere. How could I forget my snub at the 2010 Olympics, just because I had a bad outing at Europeans?

 

“That’s exactly what I’ve been trying to tell Kostya! That you were almost the same, that he shouldn’t be doing anything to you, of all people. I only made you pop that axel, and it was only because he was right next to me. I don’t want him to do this… I couldn’t bear to see my love become that way…” she argued, before lamenting over Kostya. Tears were forming in her eyes, yet I saw that she was trying to keep herself together, trying not to break down. The girl in front of me was a dark magic practitioner alright, but she was also a lover, one who had human feelings and concerns. At least from what I was seeing, her feelings and thoughts weren’t disordered.

 

_Yet._

“Why don’t you just leave him?” I asked. There was a part of me that thought that I was being too harsh. After all they were considered old by the Federation, and finding a good coach in Moscow was going to be much more difficult for them than for the younger ones. I was lucky that Eteri accepted me into her group, but they weren’t likely to be as lucky. I had to agree with her on the Federation’s issues, they generally did have a problem with their mentality. I felt that any of our ladies could have easily medalled at Europeans, and they could have done with sending two different teams to Europeans and Worlds. That was how good they were. But then, the Federation did have its favorites, and I was lucky to be in a good position so far. On the other hand, I had just found out that the three of them had some hand in controlling many of the results of the Russian team this season through dark magic and those dolls, under the influence of a coach who was actually a dark master. I wanted to set the doll in my hand on fire, but I didn’t know if I’d also burn as well, along with it… or did that only affect those who learned or had magic to begin with? Did I have dark forces within me?

 

_You said you wanted to save them, right? Isn’t she just doing the same thing, only from the inside?_

“Rukavitsyn has dolls of all of us. If we were to try leaving, he’d use them on us… and voodoo corrupts the mind. After some time, one begins to view it as normal and excusable… and I couldn’t let that happen.” she replied, her statement making me shudder inside. Their coach had the capacity to curse them?

 

“How do you know that he has dolls of you? Why do you need me?” I ask, as I finally understood where she was coming from. If things were that bad, I should be helping her in saving them… but, why me? Why, out of every single person on the team, did Maria Artemieva choose to go with me? Was I something special?

 

“He did the same thing to Makarova, when she refused to join him, and I’ve seen my doll with my own two eyes, including my name on the back in silver thread. As for my reasons for turning to you, Alenka…uh, nevermind. I just think that it would be easier for you to reach out to her and than anyone else…she’s still looking out for you, you know? She still refuses to curse you…” Maria answered. I was relieved to hear this. Though Alenka had dark powers, there was still some of herself in there. Otherwise, she wasn’t going to be refusing. Perhaps it wasn’t too late for her…wasn’t too late for me to tell her something. “You’re going to help me, right? Please don’t tell anyone… especially not Kostya.”

 

“Yes. I’ll do whatever I could, Maria. Just give me a call if you need me. ” I answered as I started walking towards the door of her apartment. “And by the way, thanks for trusting me.”

 

We were going to play a game of saving people. And we had to win.  For the sake of my teammates, myself, their sanity, and Alenka.


	17. To Our Common Future

Masha and Alenka had to medal at Universiade. The Federation was bound to drop them if they were overtaken by the likes of Mae-Berenice Meite, Viktoria Helgesson or Miyabi Oba. The bad thing? I wasn’t at Granada with Zhenya to support them, and I couldn’t do a single thing to help them.

 

I didn’t know if this magic could affect international skaters in the same way as those from Russia, considering that I’ve never tried, but there was also the Junior Nationals taking place. Not directly helping, but it was still help, as I could thin out the pool of girls that they’ll have to defeat in the future. Junior Nationals is at the same time as Universiade, and there were eighteen girls who were going to compete there, eighteen of the little girls in pretty boxes whom the Federation loved and cherished. And there were also eighteen dolls sitting on a counter, their blank eyes staring in my direction, their expressions equally blank, despite the pins stuck into some of them….

 

Eighteen dolls for eighteen little girls, but I could at least lower that number to seventeen. I grabbed the first doll I saw, a doll with light brown hair in a bun that’s wearing a black and red dress with a short tutu, and stuck a pin into it, twisting it as I pushed it into the leg of the stuffed fabric doll slowly…one needed a different technique for this task.

 

Sasha Proklova was to withdraw from this event, and the Federation would then wonder why they put their eggs in the basket of an injury-prone girl with consistency issues who was defeated by some random Armenian in the short program at the European Youth Olympic Festival, just because she managed to have a great showing in 2014’s Nationals. She’s bound to be dropped either this year or the next one. It was only a matter of time, considering her showings.

_One down…still an army to go, though._

As for the others, Kayumova and Pervushkina were mistake-prone enough on their own thanks to puberty being unkind to them, so I put away their dolls, leaving fifteen in front of me. Iushenko’s lack of a triple-triple harder than the triple toe-triple toe was going to affect her placement in this deep field full of triple lutz-triple toe and triple flip-triple toe combinations, and it’d be too suspicious for Medvedeva to bomb here… I better watch her for another year before deciding what to do with her. That left Sima Sakhanovich and Maria Sotskova among the major contenders, both of whom finished above Masha at nationals.

 

I would definitely do some work on them. As for the rest of the army, I would decide what to do to each of them after the short program, as I couldn’t be too intense at this point. It’d worry Masha and make the Federation suspicious…and there’s a knock on my door.

 

“Hey, who’s there?” I asked, opening the door after stuffing all of the dolls into a cabinet. Thankfully, it was just Zhenya, with his usual calm smile on his face.

 

“Kostya, do you believe that your power level is sufficiently high?” he asked, before tossing me a folder stuffed with papers.

 

“I guess? What exactly do you think I can use it for?” I answered, catching the folder and taking a quick look at its contents. Some of the papers had handwritten text, in Zhenya’s hand, and others were typed. Maybe he thought that I was now ready to learn how to vocalize my magic, like Alenka and Morozov could? Considering that Alenka was moody and wasn’t always the most obedient practitioner despite her power level, perhaps he was looking for someone more consistent and reliable.

 

_Like me._

“Magic is magic, regardless of where its recipient hails from. Just so you know…” he mumbled as he gave me a look that meant business, before walking out the door and closing it behind him.

 

_Oh, I get it…_

Looking at the first page inside the folder, I saw instructions on how to create a stronger medium for unleashing my powers, one that could work on the task I was to do in order to help the girls with both their present and future company. I just needed a suitable test subject for Universiade, to make sure that I don’t somehow screw up when helping Masha and Alenka. First time was always the best time to make mistakes.

 

* * *

 

The online randomizer chose Takahiko Kozuka as my victim. I guessed that I had to go along with it, even though he was the favorite to win at the Universiade, as it would make an interesting parallel with Gachinski…. how both of the non-gold medalists at 2011 Worlds reached their peak then, only to decline and struggle in the years to come….

 

_Again, another event you should’ve gone to. That was the year you won Nationals, and they didn’t choose you…a taste of the years to come?_

_Then again…at least you got to compete at Euros that year…and aren’t you inflicting the same fate on Kozuka that you wish to prevent? To be discarded-_

I couldn’t regret anything anymore. Regrets were for innocent people, people who don’t resort to dark magic to help others. Apologies were for the weak, and I’m a grown man, the furthest thing from weak. Besides, a few pins were enough to do the job, considering Kozuka’s track record.

 

Looking at the time schedule, I guessed that he should be taking the ice right now. I pulled out the doll I made using the instructions. Kozuka’s doll was only a prototype of the foreign dolls, meant for experimenting, and I couldn’t waste too much energy on him lest it backfired in some terrible way, so only three pins went into the doll, three pins that were either doing nothing, bound to hurt me or actually helping him bomb… and I did not know which outcome was the worst of them.

_I should be glad if this works, for I can help Masha and Alenka…but…_

_You’ve already jumped off the cliff two years ago. This isn’t a cliff, it’s a logical progression of your life._

_Exorcise all self-doubt from your life. What you are doing is not wrong._

_Okay! So, if someone ties you to a dartboard, shoots you, and-_

I needed to stop thinking for a bit, to liberate myself from these thoughts. I didn’t know if it was the price I had to pay for voodoo, or something else, but I could live with it if it meant succeeding. I was about to grab a drink when my phone beeped, signalling a text message.

 

_Kozuka into 2nd place, 3rd in FS, 2 falls. Great job, Kostya. ;)_

* * *

 

_So, which would it be? The army or the Universiade?_

On the one hand, the international dolls would be able to directly affect Masha and Alenka, whereas the army of little girls, not so much. On the other hand, the level of skating displayed by said army was much higher than the level of the Universiade competitors, where short program scores in the 40s were considered average, while in Russia, they were a sign that you weren’t cut out for international competitions, and I also had set out to show the federation that the little girls couldn’t be relied on. It didn’t help that  I was more familiar with performing these acts on Russians and I’d already made the dolls…. so the army won out in the end.

 

But I only planned to pin six dolls between both short programs, considering the energy it would take to curse multiple international competitors.

 

_Sakhanovich. Sotskova. Gubanova. Lecavelier. Meite. Oba._

Luckily for me, Viktoria Helgesson withdrew from Universiade at the last minute, which meant that one threat was down. As for Gubanova…. I wasn’t going to intensively pin her. Just one pin would do the trick, one pin should make the Federation begin to doubt her a bit and seek brighter prospects, put their eggs in a basket that wasn’t going to fall to the force that was puberty…sturdier baskets, like Masha’s or Alenka’s.

 

_Also, I can’t worry Masha again…even though I’m doing all this to help her…_

She was to skate eighth in the short program. Sakhanovich and Sotskova were twelfth and thirteenth…and I didn’t know if I should pin two consecutive girls again, after what happened with Iushenko and Ogoreltseva, even though I was at home and not in a stadium with cameras, and I wasn’t going to pin them that intensively…but it was imperative that I had to conserve my energy for tomorrow, when I had to be more intense and needed my energy. Also, I needed to watch every single girl here, and choose the best ones to pin for the freeskate. Using magic was going to drain me, and prevent me from choosing my victims wisely.

 

However, that question was answered when the second girl took the ice, landed an enormous triple flip-triple toeloop, scored 64.07 points despite a bobble on her lutz, and went into first place by about ten points.

 

Polina Tsurskaya was going to be pinned, that was for sure. Only one should do, but that one pin would make the Federation begin to doubt her, begin to wonder if there actually was a Polina Curse that would make them more wary of any rising skaters with said name, for the other three have all fizzled out…and Elizaveta Nugumanova was going to suffer the same fate as well, judging from the skating I saw on my television.

 

I always thought that Gubanova was the better of the pair, but now I’m not so sure, as Nugumanova landed a rotated triple loop-triple loop and performed incredibly flexible and fast spins that any skater would envy, however, there was always the free skate to change anyone’s perception of her and think that she was unreliable. I could always just pin her during the free skate and Gubanova now. None of the other girls that followed scored over sixty points, allowing me to take a considerable breather.

 

_Conserve your energy for Gubanova. You must be subtle…._

The girl took the ice as I pulled out a doll with pale brown hair wearing a pale green dress, “Gubanova” sewed on the back of its head, just under the hair, in peach thread. One pin was good enough, but I had to build up my energy to cause the worst outcome possible - perhaps a downgrade, edge call and a fall, as well as choose the best moment to do so…I guessed that she had to have a lutz somewhere in there, considering the depth of the field. Before I could think further however, she landed triple lutz, followed by a triple flip-triple toeloop.

 

_NO!_

 

Why did I assume her program was backloaded?! Just because Medvedeva’s and Sakhanovich’s were? Why didn’t I watch more closely and release my energy as she was setting up for the triple lutz? I knew how one entered the jump, and I should have seen it. Now, she was setting up for her double axel, and I quickly jabbed the pin into the doll. She stepped out of it, and I hoped that the mistake would affect her score and placement…she ended up going into third with a score of 60.77 points.

 

It didn’t have a major impact, but it would hopefully make the Federation begin to doubt her, make them wonder if putting eggs in the baskets of minors who could very much lose the battle to puberty is a good idea…. and I need to gather up my energy for Sima. I did pin her last season, causing her to finish fourth at her first Junior Grand Prix event…. only for her to rebound by winning her next event after Masha insisted that we eat out during the night of said event, finishing second at both the Final and Junior Worlds, and winning Junior Nationals.

 

I just needed to sow the seeds of doubt into the Federation’s mind, make them reevaluate their mentality and adopt a better way of sending skaters so that everyone would have a chance. Now, Elizaveta Iushenko had just scored 62.23 points and gone into third, despite only performing a triple toeloop-triple-toeloop.

 

_It’s a very strange world when you can actually utter that sentence, don’t you agree?_

She was to be pinned during the free skate as well, just to play safe. Perhaps not as intensively, as all the Federation needed to think was that she was a nervous skater during the free skate, or perhaps lacked stamina, considering the number of mistakes she was going to make, and thus could not be trusted…plus, I still needed to pin three people at Universiade to secure Masha’s and Alenka’s spots on the podium.

 

Sima Sakhanovich skated to the center of the ice as the girl before her went into last place. She had changed the layout of her program in order to prevent her from making errors…but I caused all of those errors, so that false sense of security wasn’t going to help her at all, not if there was anything I could do about her skate.

_Don’t overthink things! Just pin her!_

 

The first pin went into her doll, and I exert more effort doing so, putting in more energy. She stepped out of her backended triple toeloop. Exhausted, I allowed her execute a clean step sequence, double axel, and combination spin as I took a sip from the soda I had prepared, before sticking another pin as she started setting up for her triple lutz. Feeling that was enough not to arouse suspicions, I hid her doll once again. She scored 62.60 points, a low score by her standards though it wasn’t as bad as the one I caused her to have during Nationals, and she went into second place behind Tsurskaya.

 

A little doubt was never a bad thing. But I had dolls to make now, and I could always pin Sotskova during the free skate, where things mattered a lot more. I also had to save my strength, for the day that lay ahead was going to be a particularly draining one, if I didn’t prepare correctly.

 

* * *

 

Eight dolls sat on my tabletop. Eight girls who would be pinned in the coming hours.

 

_Nugumanova. Sakhanovich. Iushenko. Tsurskaya. Sotskova. Oba. Lecavelier. Meite._

Alenka was to skate 20th out of everyone in Universiade, and Masha 27th. Hopefully, this would help with their scores and placements, especially Masha, who was in the last group and could benefit from that. First however, I had to deal with the army that would catch up on them if I didn’t act, if I didn’t channel my voodoo magic. I did not really pay all that much attention to the first two groups, as I knew that I needed to keep myself together. Anastasia Gubanova was currently in the lead. Pervushkina and Kayumova were bound to be dropped sooner or later, for the pair of them were too error-prone to be trusted, had not adjusted to their growth spurts well, and were now paying the price.

 

_Remember, only one pin each. Or two, just to be safe. You have other things to take care of, namely, securing your love’s spot._

It was Elizaveta Nugumanova’s turn, and I pulled out her doll along with a pair of pins. I needed her to make minor errors and thus erode the Federation’s trust in her, as she was only a little girl and little girls were just that - pretty to look at, perhaps they even jumped well, but would never be as reliable, though the Federation clearly wanted to believe that they were until they saw the changes. I pushed the first pin into her doll, making her underrotate her triple flip. I let her execute a clean triple loop-triple loop and a spin, before sticking another pin into the fabric body, making her underrotate her second triple lutz. As I promised myself not to go beyond two pins, I leaned back and took off my navy blue t-shirt, gulping down some soda as I watched. The rest of her program went off without a hitch. The girl had the technical ability to win Worlds.

 

Most of the lower-ranked girls in the competition should be skating for another country. Then people would actually care about them, and they would have more opportunities as well as being less likely to turn to the dark arts in order to ensure success and longevity. Nugumanova went into first place with 178.45 points, just 1/100th of a point over Gubanova, practically tying with her. It was now Sakhanovich’s turn, and I prepared myself. I needed to regroup a bit, so I used the first half of her program as a break, letting her land her triple flip-triple toeloop and a triple salchow-triple toeloop-double toeloop…. but that was enough.

 

I grabbed the first pin and stuck it into her doll. I didn’t manage to get as much energy in however, so she ended up only making a small mistake on the landing of her triple loop. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths. Her next error had to be more intense, it just had to be….. I used her next few jumps to gather up my energy, before stabbing her doll hard as she set up for her triple lutz, which she stepped out of. For me, she erred enough for the Federation to begin to question her abilities…but that was me, so I would never know. She still went into first place with a score of 185.96 points.

 

Next up was Iushenko, whose surprisingly good score yesterday drove me to include her among my victims today. I wasn’t going to hex her as intensively, as the Federation’s trust in her had most likely already been eroded by her horrid free skate at Nationals more than a month ago, and she had the easiest technical content of everyone in the group, despite performing seven triple jumps…

 

_This is a strange competition, don’t you agree? A girl performing the easiest program in the final group still does seven triple jumps which include a double axel-triple salchow, two lutzes, and two flips…._

Just to be safe, I pulled out a pin and jabbed it into her doll’s leg, slowing her down during her step sequence, which would most likely lose levels from that. I let her cleanly execute a flying camel spin, before pinning her as she executed her triple flip, which then she fell on. Every deduction counted after all. I could pin her more, but Tsurskaya and Sotskova were higher priorities, being the Federation’s darlings, and I still needed to conserve my energy for Universiade, where I would unleash hell on a few people. She ended up in fourth place.

 

I held Tsurskaya’s doll in my hands as I waited for her to set up her first jump. I caught it this time, and pinned her before she jumped, causing her to fall on her opening triple lutz. As I now knew that her program was incredibly backloaded, I used her spins and steps to gather up up my energy, before slowly sticking another pin as she jumped again the sharp instrument fully embedded in the doll during the back end of her triple flip-triple toeloop, which made her underrotate it. I didn’t know if those errors were going to make the Federation question the validity of the Polina Curse that plagued Shelepen and Agafonova, but I could always hope that it would help strengthen its case. She ended up in second place, and Maria Sotskova took the ice. Sotskova, who shouldn’t have been the highest placed Maria at Nationals…it should’ve been my Masha, for age had nothing to do with ability, and certainly was not negatively correlated with it. If only she would bring back her triple lutz-triple toe...

 

_Just wait until the second half of her program before you pin her. Use the beginning as a break._

I don’t know how long I had been lost in my thoughts, but Sotskova was now on the ice, and was setting up for a triple loop. Quickly taking a pin, I jabbed it as hard as I could into the doll. She  ended up underrotating it, and I breathed a sigh of relief for catching that one in the nick of time. I let her spin and execute another clean jump, before pinning her on her final jump, the final pin I was going to use in this competition, and a familiar sharp stabbed through my gut, and my head started spinning once more. I had broken the army a bit but I don’t know if I could ever do enough to help them, if Masha could ever go to either Worlds or Euros, even Grand Prix events, even with a broken army….

 

_Current SP leader: Roberta Rodeghiero. Kostya, what do you think of her?_

Zhenya’s text woke me up, although I wasn’t sure why he chose to send me a video of someone with a personal best around ten points lower than Masha’s and twenty points lower than Alenka’s…but I watched the video anyways. And found myself unable to focus on a single thing she was doing.

 

The Italian Roberta Rodeghiero was a dark temptress, the opposite of Masha in terms of her coloring, with curly black hair and a dark complexion that was further emphasized by her white ombre dress. She looked up, and the mere sight of her eyes sent chills through my body, made something inside me want to impale myself with my own pins… and this had to be why he sent the video to me, as this girl had an amazing amount of power, she radiated it, and didn’t even need a proxy to channel it through…

 

_Wait… could this explain Kostner’s ban and inconsistency? Marchei’s switch to pairs? Russo’s and Cristini’s Europeans disasters?_

If I was right in guessing that she was responsible for all that, singlehandedly propelling herself to the top of the Italian pack as a result, then I had to do something. This was one powerful strega I was looking at. I was going to make a doll of her, that was for sure, then pin it during the free skate. Then, I was going to find some way to get her to join us…which probably wasn’t going to work, as she definitely was not going to move to Russia for absolutely no reason…but I could always influence her mind like I’ve done to Alenka, turn her into my doll…

 

_What the hell?! You’re seriously considering brainwashing someone into being your puppet?! Do you think Masha-no, do you think ANYONE would stand for this!_

_Kostya, this is your conscience speaking. I am not going to let you go any further, okay?! Got it?_

_Yes? No? Maybe? I don’t know? How was I supposed to react anyway?_

 

_Just push the internal conflict out of your mind, and pin the dolls._

I supposed that was the best course of action, as I wasn’t going to risk having Masha off the podium, not when the Federation could very well stop supporting her. The video player’s finally showing Universiade, and the girl currently on the screen had performed a downgraded triple flip, a downgraded triple toeloop, and a single axel.

 

_Dear everyone who finished under 7th place at Russian Junior Nationals: Go skate for Ukraine! At least you won’t be as bad as the second person they sent to Universiade!_

_Or Kazakhstan! Look at how successful Elizabet Turzynbaeva’s been after changing her name and country! She couldn’t even get out of the country in Russia, and look at where she is now! Or Israel or Belarus or Lithuania or Estonia or something that isn’t Russia!_

_Love, me._

Miyabi Oba took the ice as I pulled out her newly-constructed doll, still a prototype, but was most likely going to work considering what I managed to do to Kozuka. I grabbed a single pin and shoved it into the doll hard, causing her to pop her triple salchow-triple toeloop into a triple salchow-double toeloop. A second went in, then she messed up on the landing of her double axel. I wanted to stick a third pin into the doll, but I didn’t want to risk passing out before Masha and Alenka performed, and my energy level was down thanks to that witch Rodeghiero. She went into third place, behind her teammate Yuki Nishino, the latter supposedly the worse of the two…except for today.

 

There were four people between her and Alenka. None of them were threats as far as I was concerned, having checked their personal bests. I also had to stop thinking about how Rodeghiero could affect me…time was best spent constructing her doll. There was enough time for me to do so, and I had enough leftover fabric to make some dolls. She was on my priority list, that was for sure. After all, if not dealt with, she could potentially bring down my teammates, the ones who sorely needed to get on the podium in order to have a small chance of still being considered competitive by the Federation.

 

Just one little doll wasn’t going to use up all of my energy if ever I wanted her to withdraw and keep her away from my girl. I finished making it, red dress, curly dark hair and all, just in time for Alenka’s skate. Now, if only I could get Zhenya to mail me some of that witch’s hair while I was at it, so I could make a powerful doll for a powerful girl…and I resisted the urge to pin it and force her to withdraw as Alenka’s music began. I was going to save it for the free program, which was frankly a lot more exciting.

 

As usual, Alenka was electrifying. Her jumps and spins, except perhaps her layback…that was Masha’s specialty, were a couple thousand times better that those of every single person before her, and she was one who could draw you into her skate and make you want more, unlike all of the Federation’s darlings yesterday, who were all jumps without much substance. She scored 67.12 points, and went into first place by a mile.

_I would’ve given her a 70._

 

But I knew that in the end, my opinion didn’t matter, as I wasn’t a judge and couldn’t get into their minds…not yet, at least. Besides, my next task was to take care of Mae-Berenice Meite and Laurine Lecavelier, whose dolls were sitting next to Oba’s, and I couldn’t waste time, else they come close to Alenka’s score…especially in Mae-Berenice Meite’s case. She was the biggest podium threat among the others, and the last thing I wanted was her knocking out Masha or pushing down Alenka. After that, I will watch my love’s beautiful skating, and wish that I was there for her, watching her…cheering for her and showering her with kisses after a job well done, perhaps even take her out for some nice drinks afterwards…

 

The next skaters were of no interest to me, as I knew that they had no chance of catching up anyway. I got up from my couch without turning off the television, picking up my sewing supplies and headed to my room to hide them, lest any unwanted visitors accidentally walk in on me and either assume me to be gay or have the oddest hobbies. I placed my things on my bed before opening my closet, only to be met by a familiar white shirt hanging right in front of me.

 

_Tell me I’m dreaming… Would Masha really leave it behind?_

I took the shirt from its hanger and looked at it. Despite my denial, it was indeed the very shirt that Masha took from me the day she found out about the dolls, the shirt that she wore as her free skate costume this season…until now. Was she upset with me? Angry? I held the shirt as I sat down on my bed, staring at it for a while before putting it on and leaving it unbuttoned. Maybe I was just overthinking, and she perhaps just wanted a simple change. Maybe a move to increase her program components? Most judges still tend to be pretty stodgy and preferred costumes that were traditionally feminine. Looking back at tomboyish Alenka’s NHK short program components score as compared to pageant princess Gracie Gold’s, it was pretty safe to assume that judges don’t generally like deviations from the norm, even if a presentation, however unusual, is clearly superior. Maybe that was it, and I shouldn’t be doubting her feelings.

 

_But her style is feminine and elegant like wine, regardless of costume…perhaps more sensual, mature and sexy than innocent and princessy, but it’s still feminine. Oh well, it’s almost time._

I put the other dolls and my sewing materials back into my cabinet, closing both doors tightly. I couldn’t let any irrational thoughts bother me now, especially ones that were most likely stupid to begin with. So what if she wanted to change her costume? I padded out of the room just as the announcer introduced Lecavelier. Plopping down on my couch, I picked up the doll I had prepared and lifted my eyes on the screen.

 

The first pin went into her doll, and she messed up on her triple toeloop-triple toeloop. I picked up a second pin, twisting it as I stuck it into her doll. I didn’t have much energy left however, so it only caused her to have a bad landing on her triple lutz. I collapsed over the table, accidentally jabbing myself with a pin…

_….how did that happen? Was it Rodeghiero again?_

I opened my eyes to my blood staining the table, dripping over the dolls of Rodeghiero and Lecavelier…the latter of whom was currently skating. The pins were longer and sharper than your average ones after all. Instantly, I grabbed one last pin and stuck it into her doll, causing her to execute her triple flip off the wrong edge…but I couldn’t continue any longer. My head was throbbing badly, and my limbs felt weightless, as if I’d lost all feeling in them, and I didn’t know whether to attribute it to the blood loss or somehow, dark magic…

 

Lecavelier scored 55.29 points as I bandaged my hand the best I could, considering the pain I was going through. It didn’t end there however, and I still felt like someone was stabbing me in every single part of my body. I couldn’t fall, couldn’t give in…Masha was supposed to be skating after the last warm-up, and I needed to watch her…

 

I managed to drag myself to the table and grab my drink, taking a few sips before leaning back on the couch. Strangely however, the drink did not do anything to ease my pained state, and I still felt the same awful feeling in my body. Was this how it felt to be…cursed? I tried to sit through the warm-up despite my agony. At least it would be worth it, as long as I could watch my Masha…and there she was, skating on the ice. Her triple toe-triple toe was flawless.  

 

_…..why can’t she be the type of skater they care about? A mature lady with difficult jumps and an elegant style…not to mention very statuesque and beautiful…far from child-like…_

A sharp burst of pain interrupted my thoughts, making me slide onto the floor. It was so bad, that I couldn’t pick myself up and watch. The music kept playing, but I was hurting too much to raise my head. But from what I heard before blacking out, the audience at Universiade was applauding…

 

* * *

 

_How long had I been asleep? How long had it been since I collapsed?_

_Only pin one person today. Don’t use up all of your energy again._

But did I pass out from pinning too many people, or was that because of the effects of seeing Rodeghiero? Regardless of how I ended up in this state, I couldn’t let Masha and Alenka’s free programs suffer because of her…

 

According to the website, the final group was going to skate soon. I grabbed my phone and texted Masha, hoping she’ll read my text and heed my advice….

_Do not look into the eyes of Roberta Rodeghiero. No matter what you do… Just listen to me!_

I was about to text Alenka the same message when my phone ran out of battery, so all I could do was to hope that Masha tells her about this, tells her that there’s an ever more powerful master of dark magic at Universiade who can control people solely by looking at them….and the final group takes the ice.

 

Masha was to skate first, and Alenka third. Meite was right in between them, Lecavelier right after Alenka, Nishino was to close off the night, and Rodeghiero was to have her turn right right before her. The witch was also the most likely candidate for pinning.

_Then again, are you sure the doll you made is going to work on her?_

_I couldn’t afford be negative, especially at a time like this. I had to be optimistic and hope that Masha and Alenka both medal…and the warmup was over._

_Good luck, Masha. I love you…. and please…. listen to me…. forgive me…._

Her music was playing, and I can actually watch her program without feeling guilty today. Her first two jumping passes were perfect, and then she fell on her triple toeloop. A very odd mistake, considering that it’s one of her best jumps.

_NO! Please tell me she didn’t look into Roberta’s eyes… Please…_

The rest of her program went off without much of a hitch, with no more falls, but her one fall kept playing over and over in my head, and that just had to have been Rodeghiero’s work, no question about it. The strega was going to be pinned today in revenge for doing this to Masha… who still managed to score 170.24 points and propelled herself into first place as Meite took the ice. This time, I hoped that the French skater did look into Roberta’s eyes, that she could do my work for herself.

_Please tell me that she’s going to bomb…_

Unfortunately, she managed to land both a triple flip-triple toeloop and a double axel-triple toeloop, scoring a total of 171.54 points, one point higher than Masha, and overtook her into first place. I looked in horror at the score. This skate could not overtake Alenka as well, lest the Federation drop both of them, she had to do well and claim the gold.

_Good luck…. I’m sorry that I can’t to all that much to help you…._

I couldn’t bear to watch her skate. Every time I looked up, I saw Masha’s fall on her triple toeloop, and that was only when her music started playing. Feeling that I couldn’t take it, I left my living room to lie down on my bed. Seven minutes of peace was all I needed, and I just lay there, imagining that she finally skated a clean free program, and that she was breaking 180 and going into first place by a lot. When enough time passed, I left the room and found out that at least the second part happened, though she did not look too satisfied, which probably meant that she did not get the message, and fell. It was not Lecavelier’s turn, and I was starting to have second thought over whom to hex.

 

_Should I pin her instead of Rodeghiero?_

That question was answered when she performed a double axel-triple salchow sequence. I quickly grabbed her doll and stuffed a pin in it, causing her to err on her triple lutz-double loop. A second pin went into her doll despite my better judgment and my need to save my strength. She underrotated her triple look as a result. I let her perform a spin and some steps before choosing to go forward with a third pin, causing her to lip. I had to be thorough and make sure that nobody overtook Masha’s score, as had already dropped to third. A fourth pin, then a mistake on her triple lutz. A fifth pin, and she underrotated her double axel.

 

I didn’t feel tired at all. I felt _alive_. Such was the feeling when one had the power, had control.

 

Lecavelier went into fourth place with a score of 155.24 points, fifteen points behind Masha, thanks to me. Now, it was time to exact my revenge on Roberta Rodeghiero, who was taking the ice. I paused the video player, not wanting to look into her eyes for the sake of my sanity. Her doll lay in front of me, covered in my blood, though the fact that it was dressed in blood red hid some of the stains. I hoped that the blood would intensify the effect the pins would have on her, if they even would affect her. I kept stuffing pins into the doll, exerting as much energy as I could while piercing the proxy with two or three pins at a time, not knowing or caring about what was happening to her, but hoping that she was indeed being affected by it and thus, performing badly.

_A brief letter to you. Could you please move to Russia? And help me? You could become one of our greatest assets in maintaining our common future…_

_Actually, just show up at nationals…and help me, witch. The army’s making it’s way up the ranks, and you’re the only person who can help us…_

_Help me. Please…_

_Desperation is a sign of weakness, Kostya. It’s also one of Stockholm Syndrome and brainwashing._

_Which she is most likely doing right now to you._

 

* * *

 

I awoke to a text tone, and I found myself on the floor. My phone was on top of my side table, plugged into its socket, just where I left it before the last group started skating. Wondering who it was who left me a message, I lifted it off the table and opened the message.

 

_Maria - bronze, Alena - gold. What did I tell you about magic? ;)_

 

 


	18. A Little Chess Game

_Yes! I’ve done it!_

Apart from doubling an intended triple lutz, my free skate turned out perfectly. However, it didn’t help me move up at all, and I ended the night in fifth place, dropping three slots from my silver two years ago.

 

_However, it was a much easier competition two years ago, and you were also the only Russian man not to fall apart in either segment…. that should count for something, right?_

 

I was about to tell my coach something, but he was talking to someone on his phone, completely oblivious to the fact that I was standing right next to him. I wasn’t blind. I knew that he favored Konstantin Menshov for some reason other than being his longtime coach, and would keep contacting him at odd hours to tell him of ways to improve his programs and life…at least, that was what I picked up from their conversations.

 

Granted, it was logical for a coach to favor their oldest and best student, but I’d only finished a single spot under him at Nationals, improving seven slots from last year…plus, he was also ten years older than me, had most likely stagnated and would probably retire before 2018. Zhenya however, did not have this issue with the ladies, as both Alenka and Masha were in similar positions to Kostya and me, but he was cognizant of Masha’s existence while seemingly unaware of me…

 

_Then again, Masha was on the Grand Prix circuit, while you were stuck with a bunch of Senior Bs… and it helps that she’s such a statuesque beauty as well. Most people pay more attention to beautiful women as compared to average-looking men, and that includes… oh, what the hell am I thinking about right now?  Do feelings like this make men insecure?!_

I set off for my room, hoping that there would be something in there that would distract me from rhapsodizing about the beauty of Masha Artemieva, even though she was currently happily dating Kostya Menshov and probably didn’t care about me. Why Kostya, of all people? He was ten years older than her, and shorter than her to boot. She deserved so much better…

 

* * *

 

“Hello? Can I come in?” someone asked, knocking on my door and pulling me out of my attempts at using video games to distract myself from my life. I knew that voice too well. Deep, but sweet and soothing, almost like chocolate.

 

“Sure?” I answered, trying to keep myself from sounding too excited as I opened the door. Indeed it was Masha, who was holding a chess set for some reason. I tried not to blush as I met her eyes, which were such a beautiful shade of blue. “Why are you here?”

_If you’re interested in chess, couldn’t you just play it with your roommate…not that I mind that you’re here to see me, it’s kind of lonely in here as I’m the only roommate-less person on the team…_

“I’ll tell you later.” she whispered, walking into the room and setting up the chessboard on the table by my bed. I’m not sure where she got a glass one from or how she hasn’t broken any of it yet, but it’s rather unique and very pretty…just like her.

 

“Do you want to be white or black?” she asked, gesturing at the board. Half of the pieces were transparent and the other half were a frosted pale blue, and I wasn’t exactly sure which side is which…

 

“I don’t care, you choose.” I answered, taking a seat on the floor, before I looked up at her. “Ladies first,” I said, grinning. She rotated the board so the clear side was facing me, and told me to go first.

 

“It’s fitting, isn’t it? For us to play like this, considering our positions?” she mused as I moved my e-pawn two squares forwards. From her tone, it was almost like she was trying to tell me something, but was somehow holding back and keeping something from me. Her tone suggested a bit of fear, but I couldn’t see any reason for her to be in this sort of state that wasn’t nonsense.

 

“Positions? What are you talking about?” I asked, trying to figure out what she was trying to tell me as she moves her e-pawn forwards two squares as well, blocking mine.

 

“You’re still in the light and haven’t fallen off a cliff. The same couldn’t be said for me, at least not entirely, as much as I wish to be…” she rambled, cryptically and rather nonsensically, as I moved my d-pawn forwards two squares. She might have been in front of me, and in the same room as I was, but it was almost like she wasn’t talking to me at all, but to someone else, she could be seen as someone using me as an audience to rehearse a speech, or perhaps lines from a script…and I immediately regretted that move.

 

“Why are you being so cryptic? It’s not like I’m going to kill you if you put a toe out of line or something…..” I asked, as she captured my d-pawn with her e-pawn. I should have moved at that moment, but I was growing more interested in our conversation than watching myself being decimated by a beautiful girl at chess…a girl whom I knew to be open, warm and outgoing who was now being so mysterious all of a sudden, that I somehow wanted to know more. Whatever she was trying to somehow lead me to, I was going to find out.

 

“...humor is our best route to the truth, correct?” she asked, and I don’t know if she’s referring to her or me or some other person, but I couldn’t see either one of us being involved with life-threatening situations or evil. I mean, we were just normal athletes living perfectly normal lives…weren’t we? Sure, figure skating was tough business, and injuries were particularly costly, but that was how sport was. A knock on the door distracted me from my thoughts.

 

“Hello? Masha, you in there? Ladies’ practice is soon…” Zhenya asked, as she quickly scurried towards the balcony of my room for some reason, as if she was trying to hide from him…but I didn’t see any reason for her to do so. She was always the hardworking sort, and she didn’t seem tired. Unless this was something personal between her and our coach. Had she upset or angered him?

 

“There’s no one else in here,” I blurted out, as Masha was definitely hiding something from me, and I couldn’t risk hurting her. I couldn’t let anyone she’d interacted with be responsible for her downfall…if I was interpreting what she said correctly. She did seem tense, unlike her usual calm, strong self. If it had to do with Zhenya…..

 

“Oh well, have your fun and forget it all later…” he shrugged, glancing at me. At that moment, my mind went foggy for some reason, and our chess game now seemed a bit less real, as if I’ve been dreaming or something. Had I really played with Masha? Sat opposite her and gazed at her stunning face? I guess things like that were only in my dreams. After all, she had Kostya, and even Valya Molotov has feelings for her…

 

Zhenya walked away from the door as Masha strode out of the balcony, the sight surprising me. Why was she in my room? How and when did she get here? She leaned closer to me, just slightly, close enough for her to hear me speak.

 

“Gordei, I need to tell you something. Help me…if he ever tells you to follow him, don’t listen to him…just help me. Whatever you do, don’t let him control you, break it from the inside…” she whispered, as the world grew darker and darker around me, as if I were falling down in a dream, everything I did, saw and heard was yet another one…

 

_Help me…help me…help me…_

Her voice echoed through the dark like a heartbeat, as I opened my eyes to a chessboard.

 


	19. Pyrite

There was still hope for Masha and Alenka after all. Apparently, the third person on the Worlds team could possibly be chosen at one of the Russian Cup events, and past results would also be factored into this decision. There was still a 99% chance of the Federation selecting Pogorilaya, considering their tendencies, but just in case luck was on my side…

 

_You need to ensure a top four finish for both. Make sure that they both do just as well as Pogorilaya would’ve in their place, so they’ll at least hold on to their two events…_

Thankfully, the men had posted scores and performances that’d steamroll both Kovtun and Voronov. We could be down to one spot again if things went well, one spot that would make the Federation question if Maxim and Sergei were the best people to invest their time and money in…but Pitkeev and Petrov would be their next targets instead of me, they saw me as old after all, so I would have to pin them at Junior Worlds… and why couldn’t I get Alenka and Masha to see the problem with Sergei?

 

_They’d also steamroll you as well? Are you sure that you would’ve done better than them?_

That didn’t matter. After all, neither of them were bound to be reliable or consistent, as we’d tried to prove with Pitkeev. All that mattered today was the pair of blonde dolls sitting on my counter, dolls that’d potentially remove Gracie Gold from the world podium equation, dolls that I wanted to impale right now for some inexplicable reason….

_Because she’s Anna Pogorilaya._

_Think about it…a blonde figure skater often complimented for her looks, with great jumps that include a triple lutz-triple toeloop, but no artistry whatsoever? Who won the final Junior Grand Prix event and medaled at Junior Worlds in her junior debut? Who finished in the top ten in her worlds debut, helping her nation earn back three spots? Who used to be seen as consistent, but now isn’t? Who qualified for the Grand Prix Final this season with two medals and defeated Alenka in one of her events? Who is going to lose an event that she was the overwhelming favorite to win?_

_And since Pogorilaya is the biggest threat to Alenka and Masha going anywhere…you’re using Gold as her proxy, correct?_

I guess I had the tendency to come up with strange metaphors when drained of energy, but it wasn’t as if I was wrong. Anyways, Gold was to skate 16th in the short program…. and I still had lots of time to spare, and at most, two pins would suffice in this relatively weak field where even the best bets were inconsistent. Scores in the mid to late sixties were unlikely, and those in the early sixties already topped the field.

 

_Why doesn’t Russia treat Europeans like America and Japan treat Four Continents, and send a different team of girls to both events?! So much wasted opportunities for certain girls whose scores could easily put them in the lead, considering the fourth place score._

_A team consisting of Anna, Alenka, and Masha could've swept the Europeans podium!_

Then again, they would’ve just sent Julia instead of Masha, considering that they probably still saw her as their darling to some extent, but still…

_You would’ve gotten out of the country as well, if they did that for men. You also would’ve-_

I shook my head, trying to tune out of my disturbing thoughts. I had to focus, as it was not time. I was going to remove Gold from the list of podium contenders at Worlds, turn her into a girl who just happened to be at the right place at the right time, like Pogorilaya would become. I always preferred Ashley Wagner personally. Not only was she an older girl who was solid proof that age had nothing to do with ability and was given the opportunity to show it, she also did not remind me of anyone….

_Once Pogorilaya’s discarded…you could always make her join you…or ruin her. It’s such a sad fate, to be seen as washed-up and old at sixteen…. but this is the world you live in. Make the best of it with your dolls, Kostya._

Yes, that was what I must do. She took the ice as I pulled out a blonde doll that was wearing all blue, along with a pair of pins. Impulsively, I shoved the first pin into her doll during the middle of her combination, which almost made her run into the boards on her backended triple toeloop, but she was able to save it and not fall….

_Use her next few elements to recover. She could display Pervushkina’s resistance to voodoo, but, like Pervushkina, she’ll fall, fall into the abyss of broken dolls…_

I let her spin for a bit, let her land her triple loop…but that was all I could let her do. Enough for her to get a score that wasn’t going to look too suspicious. She started setting up for her double axel, and I forced her to err on her takeoff by piercing the doll’s leg, causing her to pop it and removing several points from her score. Now, I should’ve just turned my computer off as she went into first place with a score of 62.67 points, lower than her usual scores, but I didn’t, for some strange reason…

 

As it turned out, I was right in doing so. Satoko Miyahara took the ice right after her, and all I could think about from the second I saw her was that she, like Elena Radionova, was just a little girl as well…just a little girl with a high chance of losing all of her jumps once her body started filling out, but she still landed a triple lutz-triple toeloop and triple flip…

_Pin her too. But only use one. Save your energy for Gold._

* * *

 

My newest doll sat on top of the table. It had dark hair, dark eyes and was wearing a bright red dress. It looked so pristine, so new, but it wasn’t going to be that way for long. Oh, not a chance under my watch and in my hands. It was going to be impaled soon enough. First with one pin tonight, but I wasn’t going to stop there.

 

Polina Edmunds had just scored 184.02 points and gone into first as Satoko Miyahara took the ice and her music began to play. The entire first half of her program would be used to gather up my energy, and then I’d release it halfway through. What better way to throw away points than to mess up on the back half? Thankfully, her first two jumping passes were both shaky, and I grinned at the screen. The room was getting warmer, perhaps because of the tension I was feeling. Things were going my way, and I couldn’t help but think about saving the hex for Gracie Gold. I wasn’t about to let myself get overconfident however. If there was one thing Zhenya taught me, it was that I must cover all my bases, and leave no work short of thorough. I took off my black tank top, feeling the heat of the magic rippling inside of me. The girl was setting up for a triple lutz, giving me the signal to grab the doll and stab it with two pins. Not only did she fall, but she also underrotated it. I pumped my fist into the air. That was going to get close to no credit, for sure.

_Then, the rest of the air should go out of the balloon, and they’ll realize that she’s just a girl…_

However, she managed to recover from the fall and land a pair of double axel-triple toeloops along with a triple salchow, scored 181.59 points, and went into second. I cursed myself as I thought that I should’ve pinned her more intensively, but Gold was supposed to be the bigger priority, and it wasn’t as if I was using her as a proxy for Pogorilaya….

_Keep telling yourself that. You’re just angry that you can’t injure her._

Zijun Li was skating right now, but she was not important, she was just a break to gather up my energy for Gold, as I wasn’t going to make the princess fall…I was going to make her pop everything instead, make her throw away points in the worst way possible. Force her make a fool out of herself as she jumped and failed to fully rotate them.

_So, she Zayaks herself off the podium, like what should’ve happened to Pogorilaya, and the Federation drops her, thus enabling Alenka and Masha to fill her void…_

Li exited the ice as Anna entered and I picked up her doll, a bleach-blonde, dark-eyed one costumed in purple… and paused the feed.

_Just pin her, and make the Federation drop her, make them realize that all of her scores are inflated and her consistency is overrated. Make them see that she has no artistry whatsoever and bores everyone and you should start sending Alenka and Masha to her events, because she’s only good at jumping…_

She scored just 176.58 points and went into fourth place, missing the podium. Now, I triumphed, and either Masha or Alenka was going to Worlds, for why would the Federation put their eggs in the basket of a girl who had almost nothing, and lost the one thing she’s good at?

 

_Wait…. why did Japan send people here?_

_Don’t you remember? This is the Four Continents, not Europeans or the Russian Cup. How sane are you at the moment, Kostya?_

I thought that I was perfectly sane, that I could maintain my sanity while doing this…. but now I’m not so sure.

 

But I can’t let myself fall apart. No matter what I do, I must remain stable…..

 

 


	20. All I Ask

_1 missed call._

“Hello? Seryozha, it’s me…um, crap, you probably won’t recognize my voice…anyways, it’s me. Alenka. Uh...could you meet up with me in Saransk? For the Russian Cup Final?” my voicemail said, as I removed my skates and placed them into my bag. Of course I wouldn’t forget that familiar, high voice that I’ve known for the past few years. At least she still sounded like herself, from what I was picking up. Still rather shy around me despite her being so outgoing towards others in general.

_It’d be nice to see her again…and while you’re at it, why don’t you save her? Haven’t you remembered your promise to Maria?_

_…now I do…_

The details of our meeting a month ago came flying back at me, my brain extracting them from where they were buried under layers of runthroughs and jump drills. Eteri had insisted that I build up my stamina and consistency for Worlds so I wouldn’t make mistakes like I’d done in Euros and cause myself to fall out of the top ten, potentially being the main cause of the nation losing spots, just like Maxim did in 2013. I mean, between the two of us, it was no secret that the Federation preferred Maxim…this was where I had to agree with Kostya. Of course, I did not agree with his methods of extracting revenge, but the basic fact couldn’t be denied. I had to work hard and prove to the Federation that I was worthy of my spot, that I wasn’t too old to continue. Maxim on the other hand, could afford to be more relaxed, despite his skate in 2013.

_But was the cause behind that skate his own nerves…or Kostya? It’d make sense, considering what Maria told me…_

There was a part of me that wanted to run to Eteri and tell her everything, tell her that she didn’t need to be so worried about Julia’s apparently worsening technique or Sima’s recent inconsistency in her short programs. There really weren’t any problems with the girls affecting their skating. The problems were all caused by outside forces, I concluded. What would give Eteri a reason to believe _me_ , however? I never thought that magic existed until Maria showed me, and what were the chances that Eteri knew about such things? She’d think I was insane or just making excuses if I told her about what I knew, perhaps even send me to see a psychologist if she thought that my sanity was somehow compromised.

 

_Just start with Alenka. You can save her, and prevent any further bombings…._

“Yes, I’ll be able to get those days off. When and where to you want to meet me?” I asked after  calling her, leaving a voice message on her phone. Hopefully, I would be able to save her during this meeting…or at least put her on the path to recovery.

 

* * *

 

She told me to meet her in a cafe the evening before the ladies short program. There was a part of me that wanted to bring her flowers, for some odd reason, which led to me impulsively walking into the nearest store and buying some. Red of course, as I always thought that she looked particularly good in red and black, as they made her eyes stand out. I also chose some green paper and a green ribbon to decorate the bundle. Green is her favorite color, but I’ve honestly never seen green flowers that actually looked nice, so the paper was a nice compromise. I also promised myself to watch the ladies’ programs if I could.

 

_It’s always nice to get a feeling for the level of competition you’ll face nationally, even though I’m not watching men…and ladies would most likely going to end with Alenka winning, bar any unfortunate accidents._

_I could always watch the men as well, and cheer her on during the ladies’ competition._

I must’ve reached the cafe early despite the frigid weather, for she was neither outside nor inside. Perhaps she was on her way, heading here from practice. She had a small chance to be assigned to Worlds after all, as long as she performed two clean programs and got a total score of around 200. While Anna Pogorilaya earned her spot, I believed that Alenka didn’t deserve to be written off by the Federation, not when she was such a special performer who was just so magnetic that people, including me, couldn’t help but watch her. Her scores were among the highest in the world as well, and it seemed pretty odd that skaters with scores far below her own had every opportunity to compete in international competitions while she, who could easily clear 180, had to be left out. At least, Alenka should have been given the opportunity to go to one of the competitions, whether Europeans or Worlds. I experienced the feeling of being left out for years, usually striking me in the most crucial of competitions, so I kind of knew how she felt and wished that she got more opportunities. Still, I did not agree with the dark methods she turned to in her desperation and it had to stop, although I could never be sure how much of her decision was her own, and how much was due to influence and manipulation.

 

_In a way, I am just like her, but I’m a lot luckier in my current situation with the Federation because I’m a man._

“As I was saying, do you want a seat at the counter or by the window?” a waitress asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

 

“Um, table for two? By the window?” I answered, adjusting the bag containing the flowers, almost causing them to fall onto the floor. I looked at her, taking in her dyed hair and her tight, unbuttoned blouse. By my estimates, she was around my age and she knew it, judging from her smirk directed at me.

 

“So you’re waiting for your girlfriend?” she asked, gesturing towards the flowers as she escorted me over to the table and handing me a menu. “If she doesn’t show up, I’m always here…” she offered. I shot her a look before looking down at the menu. I was about to protest that it wasn’t for a girlfriend, that it was for a competitor at the Russian Cup Final, but I found myself unable to say anything. Truth be told, Alenka has always intrigued me ever since the first time we met, and even moreso during our time under Morozov. I really liked being around her, despite how shy she sometimes was around me, for reasons I couldn’t decipher, but Masha probably knew. I knew I shouldn’t be feeling that way, but I actually looked forward to this day and the opportunity to see her again, for some odd reason I couldn’t explain, yet still compelled me.

 

“Seryozha…is that you?” a familiar voice asked, and I looked up, turning my head towards the direction where the voice was coming from and smiled, forgetting that I was facing a girl who was also a powerful dark magic practitioner. Alenka stood in front of me, her hair up in a ponytail. She was wearing a black sweater, dark jeans, a green scarf around her neck, and her black zip-up jacket with the glittery silver “AL” over her right chest. That particular jacket reminded me of the time when I made fun of the glittery name on its back after Kolya, in a creepy move, had it made for her. I teased her that she’d finally allowed herself to wear something so bedazzled after dissing Miki Ando’s more glamorous fashion sense. She’d gone quiet for a bit, before teasing me in return about the blandness of my own training clothes before I decided to wear my necklaces to practice. Did she choose to wear it because it reminded her of me?

 

“Yes, it’s me.” I responded as she took her seat across from me. I began to read the menu, but I was more focused on her mental state, how to best help her, and if she’d just lured me here to curse me, even though Maria had assured me that Alenka wasn’t at all evil, but just easily suggestible from her encounters with Kolya’s control, and that what she did was usually a result of Rukavitsyn’s and Kostya’s control over her. She looked up from her menu, meeting my eyes, before ducking them shyly once again. I guess some things never change, and I was glad that she was just as I remembered her, at least in that respect.

 

“Uh…what are the flowers for? Are you meeting anyone after this?” she asked, most likely noticing the contents of the bag sitting right by my chair. I was caught off-guard, and blushed a bit, though I hoped that she didn’t catch that.

 

“They’re for you, actually. Have you been to this cafe before?” I answered as I handed her the flowers. She looked at me with a surprised expression as she accepted them and mumbled a “thanks”, trying to hide her flushed cheeks. I grinned at her, wanting so much to tell her that she was as red as a tomato. Hopefully, she had indeed been here, and would tell me more about the dishes, so I could order something and disguise the fact that I couldn’t seem to focus on the menu at all. Alenka was staring into either the menu or the flowers, oblivious to what I just said.

 

_Or is her mind clouded by the magic, rendering her oblivious to the world around her?_

“What? They have really have some damn good hot chocolate here…” she muttered, her eyes still ducked, thankfully pulling me out of my thoughts of lucidity and insanity and how to save her…and it would sound nice to have some hot chocolate on such a cold day. For some reason, however, she still refused to meet my eyes, even as she asked the waitress for a cup of hot chocolate, along with something I wasn’t able to catch.

 

“Okay, I’ll have that. How’ve you been?” I asked, hoping to get her onto the topic of her life, which could help me figure out the areas I can help her in, plus I really did want to catch up with her. After all, it’s been almost a year since we had a proper meeting, and I really missed talking to her, and looking at her. Now, my rinkmates were great company, but they were all so young, and I didn’t feel like I could talk to them and connect with them much on a personal level. Alenka on the other hand…

 

“Oh, Seryozha…don’t remind me. I’ve been having a rough year. Sure, I’ve got the medals that I’ve never had last year, and Zhenya Rukavitsyn seems to be working out…but here I am, snubbed by the Fed again for their favorite girls, as if they want me out, and I don’t want to quit even if they make me. Not to mention, I’ve been getting more headaches and feeling like shit lately, and I don’t…” she started speaking to me, her tone honest as she leaned forward, for the first time meeting my eyes. At that moment, I did see the pain in her face and in her gray eyes. She looked so…troubled, so tortured somehow. The faint dark circles under her eyes implied that she hadn’t been sleeping well for a while. Still, there was a hint of a smile on her face. At least she still had that optimism and determination I knew her to have. The moment didn’t last however, as suddenly, her expression became pained, then rather blank. She held a hand up to her head, as if in agony, or perhaps trying to resist something. When she looked up at me once again, she was smiling.

 

“Huh? What was I thinking?! Don’t mind my rambling, everything’s perfectly fine! I’d prefer to hear about your life, Seryozha!” she cheerfully exclaimed, grinning. Something about her words, sudden change in demeanor and expression unsettled me, as if she was not fully in control of what she was saying and doing, like there was someone pulling the strings of her mind… Feeling paranoid, I found myself looking out the window at the snow-covered street, trying to see if Kostya or Rukavitsyn was nearby. I didn’t see anyone, but I couldn’t be too sure about that. Kostya wasn’t participating in the Final after all, but I knew better than to assume.

 

I began to talk a bit about Eteri’s work with her students, and her work with Zhenia and Sima in preparation for Junior Worlds along with Julia’s technique work and my stamina drills, hoping that at least one of them would jog her memory and cause her to recall what she had done…  

 

_Would you **want** to remember cursing people?_

_Isn’t oblivion the safer choice, if the other one is realizing that you’ve done something immoral and potentially going insane from guilt?_

I didn’t want to think I’m helping her, only to become the cause behind her mind shattering even further…but I couldn't let her become more and more corrupted, until all that would be left of her was a madwoman of dark magic with all of her true self stuffed down the drain…

 

“So, it’s all little girls. Even the person I love finds them more interesting than me. Wait…that came out wrong. Sorry.” Alenka snorted, before apologizing and picking up her mug of hot chocolate, taking a sip out of it. I widened my eyes at her revelation. Person she loved? I never knew that she started seeing someone.

 

“You have a boyfriend?” I asked. For some reason, I sensed a sinking feeling inside me, but it was probably out of shock at discovering this bit of news. Unless of course, this was a result of control, and somehow, Rukavitsyn started convincing her that he was now her lover, and emphasized how she had to focus on the little girls…I cringed at the thought. The man was at least close to sixty, based on what I heard about him, and Alenka was less than half his age.

 

“Fuck…forget I said anything, okay?” she answered, staring into her mug of hot chocolate, letting the steam waft into her eyes. Her face was flushed once again. I picked up my mug and begin to drink from it, and the chocolate was very good…. if one could ignore the overly sweet aftertaste, but that might’ve been a side effect of not noticing the whipped cream in the mug.

 

“Heh, you’re got whipped cream on your nose, idiot. It’s adorable, isn’t it? I want to preserve this moment for all eternity, but…. nevermind.” Alenka laughed, shades of her old self returning, as she reached across the table, wiping the cream off of my nose with her finger and licking it. I drank more of the chocolate and smiled, grabbing her hand.

 

_I want this you to still exist ten years from now, not the one who curses people…_

“It’s a beautiful world that we’re living in, isn’t it? Masha can join us… and the other two can… jump off a cliff.” she said, her voice somehow becoming slower and more uncertain, intensely staring into my eyes. Behind her gray irises was a pained, haunted expression, coupled with one of surprise and confusion.

 

_She’s lowering her mask for you. Behind the happy girl she once was, lies tragedy._

“Is everything alright? Is there something that you want to tell me?” I asked, concern rising in my voice. I need to put her together, glue the pieces of herself back into the girl she was. She blinked once, then twice, the pained expression returning to her face, but this time more intense. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths, before rubbing her head once more and looking at me.

 

“Damn, Seryozha, it happened again. I don’t know the real reason why I’ve been getting lightheaded at times, and getting headaches right after. I’ve been feeling them around Kolya, and they haven’t stopped even after I moved. It’s as if mist shrouds my mind at certain times, and once it lifts, my headaches start…”  she answered, no longer talking in riddles and evidently herself once more. I placed my hand on hers once more, feeling the three rings she wore. It sounded like her headaches weren’t natural ones, from how she described them. I had to find out more.

 

“Alenka, do you know more? How do they happen?” I asked, my heart racing. I was very close to finding out what exactly her situation was. I just needed to have this bit of information. I was relieved to see that she was still holding onto herself. But then, I had to act fast, with Masha’s help.

 

“Voices, Seryozha. Alluring voices with a strange, sweet sound that somehow fills me and _compels_ me with such motivating words. Like pheromones, or love potions or something. I remember them…but I can’t seem to put a finger on how it happens. I can’t remember who speaks…but the voices are so familiar to me…then  the feeling comes in. I don’t know how they do it, honestly…but they understand my situation. Look, I still want to compete. Sometimes, I can’t bear how they treat me, and I can’t just sit around, so what could I do? Didn’t you feel that way in the past? Always pushed aside?” she started explaining. Her words sent warning bells ringing in my head. What exactly have those two been doing to Alenka? From her description, it sounded a lot like mind control, and she wasn’t even aware of it. The way she rationalized things…was it a product of control as well? Her eyes were haunted as she spoke, and I squeezed her hands.

 

“Tell me the truth, Alenka…do you really enjoy doing it all the time?” I asked her, keeping my gaze steady. She held it, starting to nod uncertainly, before finally shaking her head, her expression regretful. She then looked down at her mug silently. That confirmed my suspicions. Someone was controlling her, and Masha wasn’t lying.

 

“Alenka, you have to listen to me. You’re strong, you’re a fighter. Fight for yourself. All I ask of you is that you remember me, alright? Think of me tomorrow when you take the ice. I’ll be there, watching you. Think of me when you’re feeling down. Don’t stop thinking of me, Alenka.” I assured, promising her that I was going to cheer her on and watch her triumph. My presence seemed to have neutralized her, and her honesty was something I did not expect. I wanted so much to hug her, whisper to her that everything was going to be alright, save her…

_Wait, why am I imagining such things around her? Why do I think such crazy thoughts whenever I talk to her?_

“Thanks, Seryozha…you really are the best, you know? I don’t know anyone else who could believe in me so much…” she said, looking up once again at me, in her unusually shy manner, as she took another sip of her chocolate.

 

_She…. really seems to idealize me, doesn’t she? Well, we’re close friends…._

_I have to remain strong. For her, so she has someone to fall back on, someone who can help her…but am I doing this for purely selfless reasons? Do I want to do this solely to fuel my ego?_

“I love you, Seryozha!” Alenka suddenly blurted out, pulling me out of my thoughts, but for all I knew, I could’ve imagined her saying that…

 

“What did you just say? I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you….” I asked, hoping that I didn’t off as insensitive or callous, as my mind was spinning from what I guessed was magic and internal conflict. She was about to answer when someone familiar walked up to our table.

 

It was Kostya.

 

_No! Anyone but you, please! Why are you here?_

“So this is where she’s been? I’m sorry, but our coach has been looking for her…he wouldn’t want her to lose the gold, after all.” he said, before grabbing Alenka as she finished the rest of her hot chocolate, her expression pained once more. Clearly, she did not anticipate this to happen. Had he followed her? Part of me wanted to punch the man I once considered my friend for doing this to her…but he couldn’t think that I knew anything. “C’mon, Alenka. Don’t you want that spot?” he urged, leading her away without allowing her to take the flowers.

 

“I’ll see you at the Final, Alenka. Okay?” I said, looking at her as Kostya escorted her out of the cafe, and she looked back sadly, the pain still clear on her face as if regretting that our meeting was cut short. The waitress came and placed the bill on the table.

_2 hot chocolates with whipped cream._

_1 shot of vodka._

I did not remember drinking any vodka during my stay here. It had to be what Alenka ordered a while ago alongside her chocolate. How troubled was she to actually spike her drinks? I knew she loved good drinks, but to the point of alcoholism? I had to find out what Kostya was up to and watch out for her, in order to understand the pieces I’ve gathered a lot better. Tossing some rubles as payment, I put on my jacket and made my way outside, towards my car, just as another car sped out of the parking lot. That had to be Kostya, I thought. His driving speed was something he was known for in the team. Once I was inside, I started up the engine and took out my phone, dialling Masha’s number as I drove.

 

“Hello?” Masha answered, her voice holding a note of surprise, as if she did not expect me to call her. Well, I didn’t expect Kostya to follow Alenka either.

 

“Masha? Why is Kostya in town?! I thought he wasn’t competing!” I asked her a little harshly as I tried to follow the car, which was still moving quickly. I had to find out where he was taking Alenka, and to make sure she was safe.

 

“Kostya wanted to support us. You know, typical teammate stuff. And of course, you know how he feels about turning 32. He thought that he deserved a break. Wait, when did you see him?” she replied, before asking me where exactly I encountered that voodoo practitioner. I sighed, before giving her my answer.

 

“Alenka met up with me today, but he cut our meeting short. Listen, I’ve talked to her and I’m very sure that what she described to me as her headaches and odd feelings might point towards mind control.” I went on, describing to her how Alenka was, including the incident in the middle of our conversation, and telling her to remember me.

 

“Damn, Sergei…you really are something, aren’t you? I wasn’t wrong in suspecting…nevermind. Anyway, at least you know that she isn’t exactly into the idea either. She’s just desperate to compete, and her stay with Morozov has made her a bit easily suggestible. She’s still so pigheaded and moody you know? That’s why they feel the need to control her. That and she’s powerful…capable of vocalizing her powers,” she explained, her last sentence making me shudder as the temperature in the car seemed to drop twenty degrees. Alenka was _powerful_? No wonder they felt the need to control her! What would happen if ever they managed turn her against me? Unfortunately, my distracted state almost made me hit another car, only missing it narrowly. When my eyes were back on the road again, I lost Kostya’s car. “Hello? You still there?” Masha asked worriedly.

 

“Yes, Masha. I just lost them…” I replied, my thoughts wandering back to Alenka. Did she really say that she loved me? Did she really mean it? I didn’t know why the thought still lingered, and why I found myself so struck by it in the first place. I didn’t know why my longing to see her again safe and to help protect her only strengthened. I didn’t want to tell her how much of this odd, unknown feeling filled me ever since I knew Alenka for a while. Now, if only thinking of me could see her through…

 

“Just tell Alenka to think of me, alright? To remember that I’ll cheer for her and support her. Masha, that’s all I ask of her. Maybe, just maybe, something could happen.” I finished, before saying goodbye to her and putting the phone down.

  
_If you fall…. I will catch you, Alenka. You don’t have to stay in this maze…._


	21. Discardation

_My girls are going rogue._

I turned my ear away from the door of Masha’s hotel room as I walked back into my room, the bits I caught from her conversation with Sergei Voronov lingering in my ears. Did they think that I was blind? That I couldn’t see everything they did, every single thought and action of theirs? My mistake was ignoring Masha. I initially thought I could shatter her initial aversions to this art. Instead, she decided to rebel, and she’d gone against me by dragging Sergei Voronov into this, the one person who could break my hold on my Alenka and shatter her ties with me. Couldn’t she see that I was doing this all for her? For all of my students? Didn’t she tell me that she wanted so much to compete some years ago? Alenka too was turning her back on me by going on a tryst with Voronov. Couldn’t she see that I was the one who was always there for her? That she did not need to dwell on the past and go after him?

 

_She’s a traitor, isn’t she? She’s betrayed my trust, so now she must be punished. Alenka as well…_

Masha’s doll sat in my pocket, along with the ones of the rest of my students, including Alenka. I always carried them with me, just in case any of them put a toe out of line. With the dolls, I had power over them. They’d continue to follow me, and would not reveal my secrets to anyone else. I pulled Masha’s and Alenka’s dolls out, along with a bunch of pins.

 

“You don’t lock your door?” Kostya asked, walking into my hotel room.

 

_I have no secrets sans my art. I like people to think that I’m transparent._

“Whose…dolls…what?!” he gasped, looking down at my hands and reading the name stitched on the back of the blonde doll’s head, just under the hair, in fine lavender thread. The name of the girl he loved…. but not anymore. By doing what she did, she betrayed both me and him, and there were plenty of other women in this nation for Kostya to love. Besides, with Masha gone, his closest tie was to me, and he would undoubtedly obey my every wish with her retirement.

 

“Zhenya…. what the hell are you doing?!” he exploded, grabbing me by the shoulders and almost shoving me to the floor. I gave him a cool, calm smile as I got up. He wasn’t going to get off that easy.

 

_Do you really that you can defeat me? When I know everything? And I can tighten your bond with me. I will never let you go, Kostya. Never._

“She’s betrayed us, you know that? Both of them did.” I stated matter-of-factly, dropping both dolls into his hands and pulling another one out of my pocket, one that he wouldn’t even notice me working on…

 

“Regardless of that, I’m not going to hurt her! If you touch either her or Alenka any more…” he exclaimed, still recklessly threatening me when I held his fate in my hands, all I needed were my pins…

 

“Oh, what have I gotten myself into?! This is madness! How many people have I hurt?! Tell me!” he screamed, sounding like he was having some sort of mental breakdown. Poor, poor Kostya. He allowed himself to be a slave to his own emotions, and now it was making him weak.

 

“You are innocent. Nothing has happened.” I answered, pulling the pins out of my pocket. I was going to teach him about what happens when someone chooses to defy me.

 

“You liar…you spent your life playing with others like dolls, letting them shoulder all responsibility for your crimes when you escape unscathed. This is the end of our working relationship, _Evgeni Vladimirovich Rukavitsyn_.” Kostya spat, walking towards the door…. but he wouldn’t leave. I wasn’t going to let him get away with it.

 

Pins entered his doll as he fell to the ground like a puppet being cut off of its strings. I just needed to cloud his mind a little, make him forget everything that happened to him in this room and make him do my bidding…but first, I had to make him get on his feet.

 

“What do you wish for me to do….?” he asked, his eyes glassy, as I reanimated his body and he stood up. His mind and vision would remain hazy for a few minutes, enough time to carry out my plans…and I placed the pins in his hands, as well as Alenka’s doll.

 

“You will forget everything you did in this hotel room. You will also pin the doll currently in your hands. Because you’re weak, I’ve decided to show you mercy. You’ll be pinning Alenka tomorrow,” I ordered, and he nodded. If he wasn’t going to deal with Masha, someone else was going to have to do it.

 

Everything was already in place in my mind: Maria Artemieva would fall ill tonight and would be forced to withdraw from the ladies’ event. Konstantin Menshov will forever remain oblivious to the circumstances leading up to what he was about to carry out tomorrow. Alena Leonova was to err in her programs at the same event, and will not make the Worlds team as a lesson for her.

 

_They will all remain tied to me, and I will not release them._

* * *

 

“What do you mean, I couldn’t see her?!” Gordei exclaimed as we attempted to enter Maria’s hospital room.

 

“I’m sorry, but she doesn’t want to see anyone and I don’t want her to overexert herself.” the nurse answered as we began to leave. My student was fuming, I could tell….I’d been aware of his one-sided attraction to Masha for quite some time, which I didn’t understand, as Alenka was more up my alley; she had bolder, darker, more dramatic features after all, as well as those arresting, powerful eyes…it also helped that she had a lot more power. But love is the world’s most powerful emotion, the one that could be the most easily manipulated and turned into a weapon…when dealt with in the right way, that was. Doing it wrong was like opening a whole can of worms.

 

“Don’t you know that she doesn’t want to see you at all? That you, to her, are superfluous?” I asked him.

 

“Why?! I don’t understand why she wouldn’t want to see me, it’s not like I’m some random stalker who broke into the hospital!” he exclaimed. The truth was that she didn’t want to see _me_ , but he didn’t need to know that. How Masha was cursed to fall ill was quite a story. As I deemed Kostya weak, I decided to make him deal with just Alenka. First, I went to one of my partners, Valya Molotov, and asked him to carry out the task of dealing with Masha. Then, I found out that the damned idiot also happened to have a crush on Masha and refused to carry it out! What was with men and Masha anyway? I found Alenka more beautiful…but I guess that I had no other rivals for her, save for Voronov perhaps. In the end, I decided to pin Masha myself and gave her a bad case of the flu.

 

“Well…she thinks you are. Look, she’s in a romantic relationship with Kostya, close friends with Alenka…what reason does she have to care about you? To her, you’re just that creepy guy who watches her from afar…watches her every move….” I answered. He began to protest, to try and find the words that would prove me wrong…but nothing came out of his mouth, and he wouldn’t find them. I’d made sure of it before we left.

 

“Can I tell you something?” I asked, pulling him out of whatever he was thinking. As long as he never reached the conclusion that I was lying, everything was going to work perfectly, and I would have a fourth practitioner under my belt - always an asset as long as he was easy to control.

 

“Yes?” he answered, staring at the ground.

 

“Masha Artemieva is a strange woman. She’s drawn to those with massive amounts of power…and I don’t mean power in terms of position. Do you get what I mean?” I said, hoping that this line of questioning would succeed.

 

“What are you talking about?! Magic doesn’t exist!” he exclaimed. He was utterly wrong about that, and I was going to show him.

 

“People think magic is just an illusion. But they’re wrong. Have you…noticed anything strange lately? Strange phenomena in competitions, for example?” I continued. He remained silent for a bit, most likely recalling Kozuka’s errors at Universiade and putting all of the pieces together…I went inside his mind a bit and saw him trying to figure things out.

 

“So you’re saying that if I learn magic, I could rise in the ranks among the men? Overtake that wimp Artur? Impress Masha?” he asked. His eyes were shining now, and his demeanor became more positive, as opposed to his kvetching just a while ago.

 

“Yes. You will become very powerful, Gordei. Shall we begin?” I answered. Thankfully, he’d most likely take my words at face value and not question anything we’d be doing during our lesson…and if he did, I could always brainwash him like I did with Kostya and Alenka.

 

“Um…hold on. You implied that magic was the cause of Kozuka’s errors-” he began, before I cut him off.

 

“Think of skating as a video game. All of your opponents are simply enemies to be defeated, and if you were given a new type of weapon that they didn’t know about, you’d use it, correct? Isn’t this the same thing? If you were playing a game, wouldn’t you always want to have the upper hand in every battle?” I asked, hoping that appealing to his tastes in entertainment would divert his thoughts from the morality of our actions.

 

He didn’t answer, and we spent the rest of our walk to the rink in silence. But I knew that I’d succeeded. Otherwise, he would have flat-out refused to.

 

 


	22. Alternate: Exposure

_I am the world’s biggest hypocrite._

Zhenya was lying on the floor, and Masha’s doll was in my hands. I couldn’t believe that he’d do such a thing to her….. but all he was doing was the exact same thing I was.

 

_So, how are you two any different again?_

_You attacked him over Masha, but you’ve been brainwashing Alenka, pinned over a dozen of their competitors, and jumped off the slippery slope of sanity two years ago!_

One thing was clear. I had to stop both of us from ever performing this art again. I didn’t want to think about the sheer number of people we’d injured both physically and mentally over the past two years…. which I’d spent as a madman, hell-bent on revenge.

 

Rukavisytin has somehow gotten up off the floor and was rambling on and on about nonsense, but I didn’t care at all. Someone had to stop him, and that someone would be one of his first students in this art….

 

“That doesn’t matter anymore! Rukavisytin, I’m finished with this madness!” I yelled, lunging towards him and punching him in the face. While he did have the higher magical capacity of the two of us, I was also much stronger physically than him…. he fell backwards onto the floor, his head slamming into a piece of furniture….

 

_For now….. goodbye, I suppose._

 

After emptying his pockets and body of every single doll and pin, I exited his hotel room and made my way to the Russian Cup Final. Masha and Alenka were to skate eight and ninth, and I couldn’t miss them.

 

* * *

 

I got to the stadium during the first warm-up group. It was mostly empty, and I quickly spotted Sergei Voronov in the stands. Impulsively, I rushed towards the seat next to him, and quickly sat down.

 

“....the owner of the car is….. sitting next to me right now? Hold on for a second….” he rambled, turning towards me.

 

“Speak of the devil, and he’ll appear?” I quipped, trying to lighten the mood a bit, although he probably still thought that I was crazy….

 

“....so, tell me, what exactly have you done to everyone in this event? Unexplained injuries? Is Rukavisityn still mind-controlling Alenka? And if you're going to do anything horrible to me, I’m currently calling law enforcement.” he answered, tightening his grip on the phone.

 

“Evgeni Rukavisityn is currently knocked out on the floor of his hotel room. And I’m retiring.” I said, the last few words impulsively flying out of my mouth.

 

_Why did you just say that?_

_Well, someone has to replace him as head coach…._

“....wait, what? Why are you leaving the sport?” Sergei asked, putting his phone down.

 

“I’m not fully leaving, I’m just planning on coaching a bit and taking over from Rukavisityn.” I answered, plans falling into place in my mind like puzzle pieces, like I’d planned this for years….

 

“Interesting…. wait, are you going to say all this to lull me into a false sense of security, and then do something horrible to me?” he asked, suspicion rising in his voice.

 

“People can change in under 24 hours, you know.” I said, as Polina Korobeynikova took the ice.

 

All it takes is one single domino to fall, and then the rest go down with them. All it took was Masha’s doll, and his whole tower came crashing down in flames.

 

“So, should we remain here to cheer on our girlfriends?” I asked, beginning to smile. A strange feeling flowed through my veins as Korobeynikova left the ice, like a weight had been removed from my shoulders…..

 

_It’s inner peace._

For the first time in the past two years, I was truly happy.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter might be edited later. Sorry.


	23. Think Of Me

I sat in the stadium nervously as Sasha Proklova received her score. She did unexpectedly well considering all that she had gone through the entire season, and I couldn’t help but be happy for her. Whether it was because she finally pulled through, or because of something else, I was relieved that nothing out of the ordinary had happened so far. I was nervous however, for Alenka in particular. Just this morning, I found out that Masha had somehow fallen ill the night before and withdrew from the competition, and the last thing I wanted was the same bad luck affecting Alenka. I looked around, noticing that Kostya was sitting some distance away, his hands clasping something.

_Don’t tell me that’s…_

From what I could make out, he was holding something small under a jacket he placed on his lap. While I couldn’t see the whole thing, I did see some black peeking out from the top. I looked away, sick to my stomach. I hoped that what lay under was not a doll of Alenka, and if luck wasn’t on my side and it was indeed her doll, I hoped that she wouldn’t be affected.

 

_Think of me, Alenka. Think of me…_

Her music began, and I lifted my gaze towards the rink, where she started gliding across the ice in her menswear-inspired costume, with its gray jacket and black trousers. Typical Alenka, who would choose the most unconventional costumes at times. I smiled as I leaned forward, my eyes following her every move. Her first jump was her triple toe-triple toe combination, and she executed it perfectly as expected. She then proceeded to execute her spins, as well as her interesting step sequence. I couldn’t deny that her style was interesting, and different from most. Anyone who tried to say otherwise wasn’t open-minded enough. I couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief as I watched. The sight of black under Kostya’s jacket really did make me paranoid.

 

_So far, so good…_

I relaxed too soon however, and I instantly regretted it. From the corner of my eye, I saw Kostya push something long and thin into the object on his lap, just as Alenka was setting up for her triple flip. I stood up and craned my neck, only to watch her step out of her jump and place her hands down. My blood ran cold at the sight, and for a moment, I found myself unable to move. What exactly had Kostya done? I looked to my side, towards him, and gave him an icy glare. He must have noticed that I was looking at him, as he looked up briefly. Not wanting to see his expression, I swiftly looked away, and focused on Alenka’s performance once more. I smiled at her and gave her a thumbs-up just as she faced me, our eyes meeting. I saw a spark in her eyes as she leaned back on her spread-eagle entrance, before taking on her double axel, landing it beautifully.

 

I didn’t know why I suddenly felt breathless at that moment, when I knew that I was watching someone with so much power that she could kill anyone, even me…but she was also so magnetic that she could draw anyone in, and I was especially susceptible. I got on my feet and applauded, just as she finished her routine. I looked to my side once again, and saw a puzzled expression on Kostya’s face as he looked down at the lump under his jacket. It looked as if he was touching something on top of the object. I tried not to be noticed, but he caught me checking him out and raised a brow in response, as if questioning me. I turned away, not wanting his expression to ruin the moment. Sure, Alenka made a mistake, but she might have just narrowly avoided making another one, judging from Kostya’s odd expression. In the end, she earned a 67.20 and went into first. It wasn’t a comfortable lead, but it still was one, so I relaxed as I exited the stadium, waiting outside to congratulate her.

 

Kostya passed by me without acknowledging my presence, followed by a pale blond man about Alenka’s age, and another man who looked like he came straight out of The Shining. He held his hands what seemed to be a doll facing down, dressed in a gray suit jacket and black trousers. It seemed that he was hiding its front for some reason. On its back however, I caught sight of a small section of emerald-green thread, just peeking out from under the doll’s black hair.

 

_Ena Leo…. that’s all I can see for right now…._

Why exactly would he have a doll that carried the name of a nonexistent person? Or maybe this was a fake doll, and the real doll bearing the name Alena Leonova was hidden away somewhere else, for he’d noticed my observations of him….

_Hold on… Al **e** **na Leo** nova…you’re only seeing part of her name….._

* * *

 

Later that evening, I headed back to the rink, watching as Alenka practiced, her short program costume replaced by a gray tank top, black trousers and black gloves, her hair tied in a ponytail. I had to warn her that I did indeed see her doll, that Kostya was trying to sabotage her performance, whether by choice or by force, and that her mistake wasn’t her fault. Thankfully, there was no sign of Rukavitsyn or Kostya at the rink, only the blond man and a curly-haired brunette wearing a long, dark coat. Both of them seemed to be in deep conversation, so I left them be, relieved that they probably didn’t notice me. I leaned on the railings and grinned at Alenka, who waved and skated towards me. She looked happy, but behind her gray eyes was a look of disappointment, as if she wasn’t satisfied with something.

_Of course, it’s her performance… you do know how much she wants to stay on the team…_

“Congrats, Alenka. First after the short program, huh? Never expected anything less from you.” I told her as she reached the boards. She grinned back at me, before her shoulders slumped once again and she sighed.

 

“I could have done better, Seryozha… gotten a bigger lead, if only I hadn’t landed that weirdly on that damn triple flip. It was so weird, I thought I was going to do it just fine, then suddenly this pain shot up and… yeah, it just happened,” she lamented, before telling me what exactly had happened to her on the ice. By the tone of her voice, it seemed as if she found the occurrence unusual. I had to find out more.

 

“Alenka, did you feel any pain last night or this morning?” I asked, dropping my voice as I looked around nervously once again, hoping that the man and the woman couldn’t hear us. The woman looked kind, but for all I knew, she might actually be the opposite, just as how Rukavitsyn’s darkness was masked by his seemingly gentle face. Alenka replied with a quick shake of her head.

 

“No, not at all! I was doing so well at practice, and I didn’t even feel anything at all before I skated. It just… happened. Damn, at least I kept myself from falling… but I didn’t see it coming at all, and that wasn’t the end of it. Felt the damn pain just before I jumped my double axel as well, miracle I landed that…” she explained before trailing off and blushing. It was clear from the way she was speaking that she was disappointed in herself. But I didn’t know that it was not just the triple flip before she told me. If she managed to land the double axel, did that mean that she had a certain degree of immunity? Or did it have something to do with her flushed cheeks? I grinned and poked at one of them, and she laughed out loud.

 

“Fine, fine… I thought of you. Took your advice,” she muttered as she gave in, trying to suppress what seemed to be a blush. She looked down, trying to hide it. Chuckling a bit, I lifted her chin, allowing her eyes to meet mine. I still didn’t get why she felt the need to be so shy and fidgety around me, when I knew her so well, and when she opened up to me yesterday. Did it have anything to do with something she told me in particular? I remembered her telling me that she loved me, before Kostya made her leave…but how could I be so sure that she meant what she said? There was always the chance that it might have been a result of control. I didn’t know for sure.

 

“What’s wrong, Alenka?” I asked, my eyes never leaving hers. She appeared to hesitate for a moment, before shaking her head and ducking her eyes. What was it she was hiding from me? A feeling came over me, one that made me want to hold her. It was a feeling that kept coming back to me whenever I was around her. I wanted to much to give in and do it, but not before she made herself clear.

 

“Seryozha, about yesterday evening… I wasn’t lying, it wasn’t even the alcohol. Truth is… I really… aminlovewithyou,” she spoke, first slowly, hesitantly, then the last string of words tumbled right out of her mouth, as if she didn’t want me to hear them. I did, however, and instinctively I grabbed her, unable to contain myself any longer. For so long, I didn’t know what it was that tugged at me whenever I was around Alenka. She tried to hide it, and I did too…but now there was no more of that, when here she was, in my arms. Now I realized what Masha implied, and I felt something lift from inside me. It was always Alenka I wanted, and now I knew why exactly I agreed to be dragged into this mess.

 

“I love you, Alenka…” I murmured, holding her tight and looking at her once more. This time, she didn’t look away. Instead, she held my gaze.

 

“I never imagined this… I always thought… oh, whatever,” she admitted, before trailing off and hugging me back tightly. Did she perhaps, think that I preferred much younger girls and that I was eventually going to go for one of my rinkmates? I suppressed a laugh at that crazy thought. Our moment however, was cut short by footsteps coming from behind me. Alenka stiffened in my arms, and I looked back. Rukavitsyn stepped towards me, a friendly smile on his face as he acknowledged my presence.

 

“Ah, Sergei Evgenyevich Voronov, am I right? So, you’ve taken a liking to Alenka? Beautiful, isn’t she?” he teased, his expression and demeanor seemingly good-natured. I wasn’t fooled however. Behind his facade was something dark, and I wanted so much to take Alenka away from him. I knew however, that if I lingered, she was the one who would bear the brunt of whatever it was that madman had in mind. I looked back at Alenka, whose expression was pained once again, and I didn’t enjoy seeing her that way. Rukavitsyn’s expression had a slight hint of suspicion on it… or was that just me? Despite the fact that I wanted to stay, my head told me otherwise, cautioned me not to be too drastic. In the end, I left, but not before assuring Alenka that I was going to watch and root for her.

 

* * *

 

I looked around inside the stadium once more, unconvinced that I really didn’t see Kostya, or even Rukavitsyn. I mean, Gordei Gorshkov had just won the Men’s Final, and I was very sure that he was under that madman. Said boy was sitting a short distance away from me, alone with a handheld video game console, seemingly minding his own business. It was almost Alenka’s turn to skate, and I knew that as long as she skated well enough, she had this in the bag. Sasha Proklova’s total score was worrying however, given how close it was to how Alenka usually scored. She couldn’t afford to make more than a few minor errors, and I hoped that the fact that there was no sign of Kostya and Rukavitsyn in the stadium was a good omen.

 

_How can you be so sure about that? Do you really think that Kostya and Rukavitsyn don’t know about subtlety? What makes you assume that they’re that stupid?_

Elizaveta Iushenko’s score came up, just slightly below Sasha’s. It was deserved yet still surprising, as she wasn’t the most consistent one out there. Well, Alenka wasn’t either, but she generally got higher scores than that most of the time. And there she was, taking the ice in her red dress with gemstone-studded straps. I leaned forward on my seat to get a closer look at her, despite the fact that I was already in the front row. I held my breath as she executed her first element, her triple toe-triple toe. In her previous two competitions, she messed up this particular combination during the free skate while pulling it off in the short program, which was why I suddenly became nervous for her. This time however, she landed it perfectly, allowing me to relax a bit.

 

I was wrong to have done that, as everything went down from there. Her triple lutz ended up being more than half a rotation short, and she fell right on top of that; a grave and unusual error. I covered my eyes, watching from between my fingers. I wished I was hallucinating, that what I was seeing wasn’t real. The agony did not stop there, however. Her triple loop was next, and she underrotated it. I looked around from my seat once again, trying to make sure that I had not missed one of them. Gordei gave me a funny look before turning his attention towards the ice once more. His console lay on the chair beside him, and the blond boy was leaning in a relaxed manner, while looking to be twisting something on the left side of his jacket, perhaps a rivet. When I shifted my gaze back towards the ice, Alenka had just made an unusual mistake on her spin combination, when she usually was pretty good at holding her positions. For sure, that was not up to her usual level. After all, the only spin I knew she wasn’t too strong at was the layback spin.

_Think of me, Alenka… if anyone’s cursing you, please know I’m here…_

That wasn’t the end of it however. Her triple flip-double toe and solo triple flip turned out beautifully, as did her choreography, as usual, but the worst was yet to come. Her planned triple combination ended up as a solo double salchow. Her eyes turned to me once again, and I saw the pain and disappointment in them as she continued on, fighting for her program by adding a double toe after her final double axel. Both of us knew how much she wanted to be considered for Worlds, but the look in her eyes, as well as that terrible feeling in my gut told a different story. I got on my feet and applauded as she entered her finishing pose, noticing that Gordei still remained seated, twisting something black on the left side of his jacket once again. At that moment, a few people around me gasped, and I turned to see that Alenka had slipped from her final pose in a rather embarrassing manner. She picked herself up however, and tried to smile as she exited. My heart sank for her. After a couple of minutes, her score came up, a shade under 180 which put her in 3rd place behind people she shouldn’t have lost to. I stood up and made my way out of the stadium, passing by Gordei’s seat and giving him a thumbs-up for his winning performance. He smiled a bit at me in return. That moment allowed me to see the left side of his jacket, which had seven round black studs arranged in a rather messy pattern, studs that looked almost like pinheads. I walked away for a bit, and positioned myself some distance behind him. Gordei opened his jacket and detached a black-haired doll dressed in red from inside it. He then started pulling out the objects from the front side of his jacket, which really were pins, and stuck them into his pocket, followed by the doll.

  
_Stupid, so stupid… what could you have done?_


	24. Sweet Intoxication

I gripped the knob of the door without bothering to knock, knowing full well who lay behind it, most likely in a terrible state. I must admit that I was rather rash in doing what I did to Alenka, but I wanted her to understand our position, and not go off wasting the opportunities that I was trying to present her. She was so beautiful, talented and unique, unlike most other skaters. How could I make her understand what I was trying to do for her? How much she needed me, especially in such a deep field where there was seemingly no place for anyone above twenty? I pushed the door open and walked in. Alenka sat on her bed, wearing only a bathrobe. Her face was dry, but her expression told a different story. She was after all, blessed or cursed with such expressive eyes and the tendency to wear her heart on her sleeve.

 

“Explain it to me, Zhenya. The sudden pain in my leg in the short program, my weird fall at the end of my free. Explain why those things just had to happen when I needed to do the best I could? Because, I sure as hell didn’t see Kolya anywhere,” she spoke, before turning her head to face me. “Is there something you’re hiding from me, Zhenya?! These things don’t just happen, am I right?! Tell me, who is the man behind the damn mask you wear?”

 

I must admit that for such a seemingly problematic girl, she was smarter than I thought her to be. Did she see right through me? Would she hate me for what I did to her? I did not want to resort to doing what I did, but she was growing rash and I had to do whatever I could to help her career, and stop her from making stupid, irrational mistakes. I still felt terrible for hurting her, and seeing the pain in her eyes only made me feel much worse. Why did she have to love Sergei Voronov, a powerless man who couldn’t do anything for her? Did he even reciprocate her feelings? Why couldn’t she see that there was someone who wanted her and would do anything for her if only she allowed herself to see him in a different light? To me, Alenka was someone I couldn’t just watch from a distance. I wanted her, and I had to make my move. Sergei is nothing, and if I succeed, I wouldn’t have to worry about rumors spreading, and Alenka’s powers being wasted or falling into the wrong hands. I could save her from herself as well, and show her that she could be so much more than she thought…

 

“Alenka, listen to me…” I started, but I was cut off by her covering her ears, shaking her head and backing away from me, just as I was about to sit next to her. She snarled at me, evidently her stubborn, difficult self once more.

 

“Yeah right, Zhenya. You were behind it, weren’t you? Tell me!” she growled, giving me the most hateful look she could muster. Her eyes pierced me, and I was taken aback by the power she radiated. So immense, so powerful, yet she would never use them for the right reasons unless controlled. I gave her a warning look in response, directing some of my power towards her. She stopped, her expression changing to one of fear. “Zhenya… who is the man behind the mask? I see one person, but I sometimes speak to someone entirely different…” she murmured. I kept my expression soft as I neared her, sitting on the edge of her bed. This time, she didn’t move away. At that moment, she was someone I wanted to protect, someone I wanted to give everything to…but she was making things so difficult for me. If only she would allow herself to surrender to me without magic, then everything would be a lot easier. I wouldn’t have to worry about her going rogue, and I would have in my hands a great power, so dark and beautiful…

 

“Alenka, what do I have to hide? Would I have any reason to do so?” I asked, taking her hand. Her eyes widened as she looked at me, evidently from the unexpected gesture. I didn’t stop there but instead, leaned in closer, looking at her earnestly, allowing some moments to pass before I spoke once more. “Perhaps you’re right, that I am like you, Alenka?”

 

“What’re you talking about?!” she exclaimed, attempting to shove me away from her.

 

“You do feel that you aren’t always in control? Well, let me tell you something. I too, am not always in full control of my actions. There is a man standing over all of us, Alenka, and I do not know who he is.” I answered, tightening my grip on her arm, hoping that she’d fall for my lies and not notice that there was anything wrong with this situation… she was a girl who was so easy to fool after all, if I played my cards right. I knew that she still did not have a clear idea on what I was capable of, thanks to my powers.

 

“...who is he?! Tell me, who is the person standing over us all?!” she yelled, trying to pull her arm away from me. I held on however. Luckily, she was a small girl unlike Masha.

 

“Alenka, I can’t tell you about this just yet. It’s dangerous. I have to trust you, love… make sure that you’re not going to betray me… trust me, Alenka, please, let me in. From the day I first laid my eyes on you, I knew that you were not just any ordinary girl. I sense... I know that there’s someone standing over me and forcing me to do terrible things. Don’t be angry at me Alenka. We’re both victims, and I want to protect you.” I answered, pulling her into a tight embrace, and she was so close, I just needed to manipulate her a bit further, use the darkness of my words to pull her in with sweet intoxication, that she wouldn’t be able to fight my lies. I would make sure of that.

 

“I understand, Zhenya….” she murmured, my enchanted words seemingly taking effect. After all, both of us were victims of circumstance, right? At least, that was what I was going to make her believe, as long as I had a hold on her.

 

“Help me, Alenka. Help me...” I said, beginning to kiss her. First on the side of her face, before my lips traveled down to hers. There was a moment of hesitation, but I pushed on and she soon gave in. I felt a tear roll down her cheek as I deepened my kiss. Perhaps she was going to shed tears now, but soon there would be no more of it, no more talk of Sergei. She would forget those fears, drop her resistance and surrender to my hold. I held her as I started planting passionate kisses on her neck, her body stiffening. That didn’t bother me, and instead I proceeded to loosen the cord of her white bathrobe. I was about to push the garment off her shoulders when I heard someone running up the stairs. No, there was no chance that it was going to be Sergei Voronov. The man was powerless and weak, and it was unlikely that he knew we were staying here. Most likely, it was a member of the staff, an unsuspecting man whom I need not fear.

 

Alenka, my dark sorceress, was now in my grasp. A little more time, and there would no longer be any resistance. No one would discover what I’d done to bind her to me. I was sure of it.

 

 


	25. Alternate: The Role Of Law Enforcement

_Alenka…. where the hell are you?_

After the Russian Cup Final, I’d tried to find her and comfort her about her third-place finish, but it seemed as if she had disappeared into thin air after the podium ceremony. It was almost as if someone had forced the two of us away from each other, and Rukavitsyn did know about our relationship, seeing as he caught me kissing her just yesterday.

 

_So, she now has an incentive to escape him, and he’s there to make sure she stays tied to him…. in every manner possible. That includes… oh god, what the fuck?! That’s just wrong on so many levels… why did I think up that?!_

I remembered thinking a horrible thought back in the cafe, that Alenka was possibly in a relationship to some degree with her madman of a coach. Suddenly, it didn’t seem so ridiculous after all, considering that Rukavitsyn was in a position of power over her, and that there were indeed coaches who tried to take advantage of their students. In response to my thoughts, I quickly yanked my phone out of my pocket and dialled the number of the local police station, even though I was probably overreacting and being paranoid. Chances were, she was perfectly fine and left on her own accord out of disappointment, but there was always the possibility of something much, much worse happening.

 

“Hello? This is Sergei Voronov, and I think my girlfriend’s been kidnapped,” I blurted out, not knowing or caring if there was anyone on the other end or if she was actually in any danger. Being in the company of a madman meant that she would never be truly safe if I didn’t do anything. Why didn’t I just call the police earlier, before she even started her short program? I was stupid, so stupid... how much longer before her inevitable descent into further madness?!

_“Hello, my girlfriend’s being brainwashed by her coach and another person into performing voodoo on figure skaters and is also going insane?”  Doesn’t that sound completely ridiculous?_

“Sir, could you please tell us her name again, we missed it the first time,” the deep voice of the woman at the other end asked, pulling me out of my thoughts. I groaned inwardly. How could I have forgotten that? Such basic information… the madman’s antics surely was becoming the death of me.

 

“Alena Igorevna Leonova. She’s about 159 cm tall, has dark hair, and was kidnapped by a man named Evgeni Vladimirovich Rukavitsyn! He’s bald and on the heavy side,” I answered as I rapidly exhaled, words flying out of my mouth like wind.

 

“Do you have any idea where the suspect is?” the policewoman asked. Most likely, Rukavitsyn had taken her back to the hotel, with Kostya at the wheel, knowing how fast the latter drove. Did I even have time left?

 

“Seriously? He’s her coach! His group is currently staying in a hotel around here for the Russian Cup Figure Skating Final, and she’s most likely with him and accompanied by a blond man about her age. Look, I’m calling from outside the rink, and I don’t see any of them! Could you please find her? I don’t want him to hurt her and - ” I rambled, short on breath, before the policewoman cut me off.

 

“Calm down, sir. I understand that you’re worried about her, but we’re currently searching,” she scolded, her voice seemingly even. Despite her reassuring words, I didn’t know if they were actually trying to find her and I was just being paranoid, or if they were just lying to alleviate me. I tried to think that it was the former however, as I couldn’t think about worst-case scenarios, lest I let my mind and the silence drive me mad with worry and panic…

 

After an eternity, the policewoman at the other end of my phone finally spoke.

 

“Sir, your suspicions are correct, she’s in his hotel room - ” she told me before I dropped the phone and began to make a run for the hotel, not knowing or caring about what else she was saying. Fear drove me, love kept me going…I couldn’t bear to stand around and listen when I already had an answer, especially when my time was running out.  

_Alenka, I should’ve done this earlier! I shouldn’t have let him find out about this! I’m sorry!_

_Oh, look at you being selfish. Making her tragedy all about you, when you are a completely unimportant minor character in this story…_

* * *

 

Somehow, I got to the right place by following a bunch of sirens. Trailing behind policemen led me to a higher floor in the hotel, the floor which very well could be where Team Rukavitsyn was residing in. Someone was in the process of opening the door to one of the hotel rooms, calling the madman’s name as he banged hard. After a minute, the door broke open, revealing the scene inside it. All I could see was him lying on his bed with-

 

_What the fuck?! This isn’t happening, this is not happening, he could cause people to hallucinate or something, so that’s what I’m seeing, not…_

“Sir, what exactly are you doing to the woman in the room with you?” someone asked, as the world started spinning, like someone was violating my mind and sanity by grabbing my brain and playing with it. I turned around, refusing to look any longer. I did not want to see her terrified face, his madness, I did not want to see anything…

__

_**So, this never happened. You did not do anything after the Russian Cup Final. Alenka is perfectly fine, and…** _

__

_Why am I thinking this?! It’s one thing to cope with disturbing stuff by pretending they didn’t happen, and it’s another to act as if they never happened!_

 

_I called the police because I was worried about Alenka! I didn’t just break into your hotel room for no reason, and… why am I moving towards you?! Why am I… Oh, god, what am I telling you?! What are you forcing my body to do?! How the hell did you get control over me and your students? What are you going to make me do to Alenka?!_

 

_Someone! Restrain me! I don’t care how you do it, I just want you to stop my body!_

The world turned to pure white as Alenka’s voice surrounded me, and my eyes closed.

 

* * *

 

“You did it. It’s over now, Sergei.” a voice said as my eyes opened. I wanted to scream, but the person sitting next to me turned out to be Masha Artemieva, who was reading a newspaper whose headline was facing me. Her face was untroubled, and for the first time, she looked as if a heavy weight was lifted from her shoulders. Said headline was accompanied by a picture of a heavyset bald man being dragged out of a hotel room by two policemen.

 

_Figure Skating Coach Caught Sexually Assaulting Student, Investigations Pending._

“...is she alright? Alenka?” I asked, blurting out the first thing that came to mind.

 

“She’s… getting help and recovering from it all. Progressing faster than expected as well. The article’s a bit vague about what exactly happened, but the important thing is that no one else is going to be hurt by him, and he won’t control anyone else for the rest of his life.” she answered, placing the paper on my table.

 

It’s strange, the fallout of one’s actions, right? How one decision leads towards another, until we’re left with a giant mess to clean up.

 

“Between you, her, Kostya, Gordei, and everyone else he worked with… I think we all need some time to recover from all of that.” she remarked, folding her hands and turning away from me.

 

_So… it’s over. All of the magic’s gone… or is it? At least there’s no more madness on our parts for now. We still have to deal with reality, perhaps even more of this darkness wherever it may hide. But we’ll find our way into our futures, futures of our own choice… without a madman standing over us._

_And maybe that’s good enough._

 

 


	26. A Conspiracy Of Little Girls

_It’s…. an omen, isn’t it? The trio of bronzes won by little girls…._

The dolls of Wakaba Higuchi, Karen Chen, and Zhenia Medvedeva emotionlessly stared at me at I pulled up the stream from Junior Worlds. Thankfully, the event was actually somewhat near me, so I wouldn’t have to torture myself waking up at odd hours to pin six dolls, six dolls of six little girls…because it wasn’t only Russia with this problem, but America and Japan as well, for all three of those nations had a little girl win the bronze medal at their national championships, pushing the older, more experienced girls and women further into the background and limiting their future chances.

 

_It’s a virus… and if I am the only doctor who acknowledges it, I must eradicate it. It’s all for Masha and Alenka’s future, which can’t be any further impeded…_

_Keep telling yourself that. You **still** don’t remember the horrible man you’ve become?_

My head began to grow heavier as a scene in a hotel room started playing in my mind. I’d attacked Zhenya in there, for he’d pulled out a doll of Masha and was pinning it… but that didn’t make any sense at all. No way in hell would Zhenya do that, especially when he promised me that he wasn’t going to pressure Masha and force her to want out.

 

As if to steady myself and wipe that horrible thought away from my mind, I grabbed Medvedeva’s doll and began walking towards my closet, deciding not to go forward with cursing her. It would be much too suspicious for her to err here, she was the heavy favorite to win the competition and follow in the footsteps of Lipnitskaya and Radionova. They weren’t going to last however, with their small jumps. They’d all become destroyed stars, ones that exploded too early as Alenka and Masha surged ahead of them in the long run, despite the Federation trying to get rid of them.

_Use most of your energy on Sotskova, so you’ll remove the biggest obstacle from their path. Force her to bomb so that she would be pushed to remain in Juniors for another year._

I quickly deposited her doll in the closet, and walked back to my computer. I could never spend too much time in there, for the mere sight of all the other dolls’ eyes made me want to grab a pin and kill myself, the same way Roberta’s eyes did…

 

_Because you’re their executioner? The man behind their failures? If someone were to expose you, and tell all of your victims that you’re the reason behind their errors, how do you think they’d react to you?_

_Forgiveness is not a valid answer, Kostya._

The start of Higuchi’s music pulled me out of my thoughts. I grabbed her doll and a single pin, as I didn’t want to pin anyone too intensively before Sotskova, my primary victim, who was skating thirteen girls later. Higuchi’s double axel was beautiful, but she powered through her skate with no awareness of her music, just like most little girls, only focusing on the jumps without taking into account that a program was a program and not a jump clinic. A few seconds later, she was setting up for her triple flip-triple toeloop.

 

I knew that she would most likely take it off on the wrong edge and lose points, but why not make her err on the landing instead, forcing her to lose even more? The pin went into her doll as she jumped her toeloop. It turned out messy, but she was able to save it with minimal interruption to her program. Part of me wanted to make her err on her lutz as well, but I couldn’t drain myself of all my energy thirteen girls before Sotskova. I was not Alenka, let alone Roberta.

 

She scored 61.27 points and went into first place by about ten points. I put her doll back down onto my table, and picked up the doll of Tyler Pierce, the doll of a girl I’d never expected to ever pin, as she never got good scores… until the US Nationals that was.  Of course, there was always the chance that it was a fluke, but I had to be prepared in case she turned out anywhere near the level of her teammate and replicated that performance.

 

_So, you have two girls to build up your energy for this one. Just let it build up in your bloodstream, and let it explode in her doll…_

The next two girls posted scores that didn’t concern me at all, and they’d most likely not get into the freeskate. The warm-up group was relatively uneventful, and I didn’t notice much of what was happening, as I was too busy building up my energy. My target finally took the ice. Her first jump was a triple toeloop-triple toeloop combination, and I shoved two pins hard into her doll as she twisted in the air during her second triple toe loop. Her body unwound prematurely, and she fell hard as she landed.

 

_Congratulations! Her goal was to improve from her 14th place last year, and now her federation thinks she’s unreliable._

_Well, that’s how little girls are… and older men? They’re going to kill their bodies if they go any further, so why should we all aspire to be Plushenko?_

_Kostya, all you’ve done is reverse the direction of the bias, not stop it. All you’ve done is cause everything to end up just as it was before, but with you reaping the most benefits. You’re not a good person. If this was a story, you’d be the villain… the man who sold his soul… you’d be Doctor Faust, and Zhenya your Mephistopheles…_

The familiar melody of Requiem for a Dream pulled me out of my thoughts. Karen Chen had just begun her skate, which meant that Maria Sotskova was to take the ice right after her. I grabbed her doll, a black-haired, beady-eyed one wearing purple, along with a pin… which I stabbed the doll with as Chen set up for her triple loop-triple toeloop combination. Her landing on the first jump turned out messy, and she couldn’t complete any sort of combination in this program, as the lutz had to be a solo jump, ensuring that she’d lose several points, factoring in the combination penalty. She scored 51.64 points and went into fifth place, proving to her nation that her medal was just a random fluke after all… that she wasn’t poised to take Ashley Wagner’s place.

 

_Okay, focus! Pin Sotskova, so she’ll fall by the wayside as the Federation realizes that she’s just another Shelepen, just another girl who was good but not good enough. They would hold her back in Juniors, allowing Masha and Alenka the opportunity to hold onto two Grand Prix events each._

She took the ice as I grabbed her ridiculously-dressed doll and a pair of pins. I still couldn’t fathom why she would choose such an ugly dress for herself, neck ruff and all. Her music began, and she set up for her triple flip-triple toeloop combination….. which she fell on the second jump of. Her next few elements were clean, but her most valuable one, the triple lutz, was underrotated.

 

Maria Sotskova scored 53.95 points and went into fourth place as I finally exhaled, for she was out of the way and unlikely to move up, but I couldn’t stop pinning, for Yuka Nagai took the ice right after her, the little girl who’d pushed someone older out of their rightful spot….

 

A single pin went into her doll as I fell over the table, my head clouding with pain. It was like I was being stabbed with a million swords…. after what felt like an eternity, my eyes open to a girl in blue with blonde hair….

 

_Just in time._

My final pin went into Sakhanovich’s doll as I fell over the table, collapsing once more.

 

* * *

 

_Why exactly are you doing this again? Why are you even pinning the doll of the girl in 19th place? Isn’t it incredibly unlikely that she’ll get anywhere near the top ten, or ever get out of her country after this mess?_

But, there was also no pressure on any of the girls in the first group, and if she was able to skate cleanly… there was a small possibility that she could move into the top ten. Her Nationals score said something after all: that she was very capable of doing so. Tyler Pierce took the ice as I grabbed her doll and the pin canister, and the music of Swan Lake began as she started her program. Unfortunately, she did absolutely nothing to draw me into her skate in its first few seconds, so I had to entertain myself with the pins and the pin canister. Yes, it was so boring that I actually found sharp pins with plain black heads more interesting.

 

The first pin went into her doll, and she underrotated the triple toeloop in her double axel-triple toeloop combination. Another went in, and she completely butchered her attempt at what was supposed to be a triple lutz. Still extremely boring, and the only thing I was able to do to make the program more entertaining was to see a disaster. After all, everyone remembered meltdowns more than mediocre programs. For something to be remembered, it had to stick out in one’s mind. Simple psychology, something Masha taught me. I then proceeded to do just that, and stuck ten more pins in succession, watching the girl’s program fall apart.

 

Tyler Pierce had fallen three times, underrotated six jumps, and gotten low levels on three of her non-jump elements. There was no way in hell she was getting out of her country after this performance, which had a very high chance of losing her nation’s second spot. Oh, the American Federation was going to remember her alright, as the one who failed miserably at the competition they trusted her to do well at for the second time in a row.

 

_Okay, Kostya, look at your life and your choices. What the heck does Tyler Pierce have to do with helping Masha and Alenka get out of the country? Who’s she a proxy for? Proklova? Iushenko? You caused Alenka’s state at the Russian Cup Final, remember? Remember how you’ve been helping brainwash her for the past year? Remember how you jumped off a cliff two years ago, and killed your personality with that leap?_

Why was I doing this? What _did_ Pierce have to do with either Masha or Alenka….. and why did I have no memory of the events that occurred right before the ladies’ short program at the Russian Cup Final? I remembered Alenka’s doll and forcing her to make mistakes that might have just cost her a Worlds spot, and Masha falling ill and being forced to withdraw.

Why was I suddenly questioning my actions so heavily? Why did Zhenya even have a doll of Alenka? Why did I feel like I couldn’t tell him anything, and why did I want to apologize to Masha so badly? Did I actually agree to force Alenka to fail? What about Masha getting sick on such short notice?

_Because you did. Or maybe it was Zhenya, but…oh well, it was one of you. Simple logic. Who else could it be? Gordei Gorshkov, the idiot?_

I opened up the stream, and the girl currently skating had dark hair and was wearing red, black, and silver. She’d just landed a beautiful triple loop, and was actually drawing me into her program… but I couldn’t let this girl, this little firecracker hypnotize me and distract me from my goals… whatever they were. Witch or not, she was going down.

 

I grabbed her doll and the pins, and shoved a pair of them into the doll, making her fall on a triple salchow that was short on rotations - downgraded for sure. She was able to recover quickly, however, and landed a triple lutz-double toeloop…. so I shoved a second pin into her doll, causing her to fall on her double axel. I thought that that’d be enough, but she then executed a beautiful layback spin, which’d cause her to potentially negate the impact of her fall right before it…. so a third pin went into the doll, which forced her to come up short with the number of rotations she had in one of the positions.

 

Turned out, it was all for naught. Even with the falls, Karen Chen scored 105.66 points, only a single point below Masha’s personal best free skate score, and went into second place, right below Maria Sotskova…

 

_NO!_

_She was supposed to be dropped at this event, not pull herself up several slots and get a personal best score! Why did I forget about her doll? Why didn’t I pin her instead of Chen? Now there goes any chance of Masha getting anywhere near the Grand Prix series. And as for Alenka?_

_You only have yourself to blame, Kostya. You are the only reason behind the Federation seeing her as unreliable. You willingly collaborated with Zhenya, you know? She’s just like you. The pair of you do well in your short programs, only to drop like a stone in the free skate. They don’t want skaters that give them all that false hope… they’re just logical!_

_And you hexing Alenka prevented them from dropping Sasha, so….. you’ve done more harm than good, Kostya. Why don’t you just stop? Because you’re weak._

_You chose this path, Kostya. Live with the consequences._

The music of Adelina Sotnikova’s Olympic winning free skate pulled me out of my thoughts. Another dark-haired, early teenage girl appeared on the screen, with dark hair and was wearing red and silver. Just another little girl... and she was setting up for a triple lutz. I quickly grabbed one of the red-clad dolls lying on my table and shoved a pin into it, causing her to pop the lutz, but she was somehow able to tack a double toeloop onto it… and executed a triple lutz-triple toeloop right off the bat.

_Either little girls are more resilient than you think, or you’re hallucinating some random person as Karen Chen. Or are you going insane?_

The girl on the screen was setting up for a triple flip as I shoved another pin into her doll, hoping that she’d fall on its takeoff, but all she did was execute it off the wrong edge. I supposed that I could let her perform a layback spin and steps, but she, like Chen, drew me into her program…it had a hypnotic quality, like she’d tied me to the wall and forced me to watch her land a double axel-triple toeloop-double toeloop and a triple loop….. I quickly grabbed her doll and stabbed it with a pin, forcing her to underrotate her final triple salchow as I tried to keep my eyes on  the screen, trying to ignore the questions buzzing in my head.

 

_Are you sure that someone was actually skating, and you didn’t hallucinate Karen Chen? Why do you care so much about American juniors, exactly?_

_I’m… getting rid of sonograms. That’s reason enough to carry on. Skating... the ones who win must be the ones who triumph through their worst years and continue getting better, not the ones who do so before that._

 

 


	27. Test Run

_“I’ve seen much potential within you, and you can even surpass me, Gordei.”_

Finally. Finally, I understood why Zhenya was spending so much time with Kostya. Finally, he noticed me, and set on a path that’d cause Masha to notice me. Finally, I now had the opportunity to gain a bit of control over my career, if I just remove my greatest obstacle…which was Artur Gachinski, though the nation’s junior men were a close second behind him. Gachinski was my main priority, however.

 

I removed the muffins I baked for my snack from the oven as the timer went off. Zhenya told me that I had done amazingly well with a single doll, and wanted to see what I’d do with four of them. The dolls of the Russian junior men and Shoma Uno blankly stared at me as Boyang Jin exited the ice. Alexander Samarin, that cursed boy, was to skate right after him, so I picked up his doll and the pin canister.

 

_Remember, be logical. Don’t use too many pins, and only pin him at the places where he can lose the most points._

I did not see why I had to focus too much of my energy on him. After all, he already was doomed the day he went to Svetlana Sokolovskaya. I wasn’t an idiot, I knew what happened to those who dared go under that woman. His music began, and it was incredibly annoying to my ears. I quickly muted the stream to keep it from bothering me, before pinning him as he set up for a triple axel-triple salchow sequence, causing him to fumble on the half loop in between them. I probably should’ve pinned him earlier, so he’d err on the axel instead of the connecting step, but what was done was done. If there was anything Zhenya taught me, it was that I shouldn’t overthink things. It wasted energy, he told me. The boy was able to land another triple axel and a triple lutz-triple toe combination…. so I quickly pinned his doll on the triple loop right after them. I supposed that his non-jumping elements could serve as a break for me to regain my energy, as I couldn’t use it all up on the first person that I was pinning…and only a stupid person would think that guys got higher spin levels than girls. I could leave him be for those, but I wasn’t going to let him perform any more clean triples, so I forced in two more pins, making him err on the takeoff edges in both his flip and lutz. Perfectly acceptable, as edge calls were now penalized more heavily this time around. The rest of his program consisted of a bunch of double axels and non-jump elements, so I wouldn’t need to worry about them.

 

I headed back to the kitchen and grabbed the muffins from the oven and placed them on the coffee table. Orange-chocolate chip, a flavor which reminded me of Masha. Seemingly simple yet rich and extremely tempting and addicting. It was just like Masha’s appeal - seemingly uncomplicated and warm, but her personality, well-spokenness and subtle sensuality made one want more of her. Alenka? She didn’t have such. Moody, with boyish mannerisms, a bit too loud for my taste and drinks too much to boot. I watched as Samarin went into seventh place with a score of 201.70 points, taking a few bites out of the first muffin I picked up. Jinseo Kim took the ice right after him, but he frankly was the least of my concerns. Adian Pitkeev, who was also the greatest obstacle of the skaters in this competition to me, was to skate after him. He was my priority right now.

 

_Help me… help me… help me…._

Why was a voice echoing in my head while I was eating? Images of a hotel room flashed in my memory, followed by that of a tall, beautiful blonde woman in a white tank and blue jean shorts who’s running towards me. These images were unfamiliar to me, but why was I seeing them? When did these things happen?

 

_It never happened. Zhenya said it didn't, right?_

Thankfully, the announcement of Jinseo Kim’s score pulled me out of those odd, unfamiliar thoughts. It was now time for Adian Pitkeev, and I grabbed his doll and the pins, for he had to bomb at this competition, had to get out of the way so I could rise to the top instead. It was partially his fault that I was never given the opportunity to compete in important competitions after all. From experience, I knew that his first jump was a quadruple toeloop, like most men did. As he set up, I stuck a couple of pins into the doll. The jump ended up a disaster, as he both underrotated and fell on it. Of course, that was going to make his score take a big hit, and show the Federation that he wasn’t ready, or that his mind wasn’t able to handle the pressure.

 

_That’s going to provide a major blow to their confidence, right? How the next guy in the pipeline sucks at quads and can’t even land them?_

I missed his second jumping pass, but he was setting up for a triple axel, which I forced him to pop it as a third pin stabbed his doll. I supposed that this failure to land both of his highest-scoring jump passes would prove significantly detrimental to his score, but he could always come back from them and land more triples, like he was currently doing right now…. so I grabbed a fourth pin and pushed it into the doll, causing him to pop the triple salchow in his three jump combination.

 

_That should be enough._

And it was, as he scored 210.71 points and went into fourth place. I was capable of so much better, and the Federation should take note of that. Shoma Uno took the ice, and I had no idea why Zhenya wanted me to pin him. After all, he wasn’t Russian, which meant that he wasn’t in my way.

_Strange thought, isn’t it? Especially when you’re supposed to take care of any potential obstacle in the way of potential international medals that could raise you up in the Federation’s eyes?_

_Oh, and by the way, Masha would hate you for doing it, really hate you. She’s everything you’re not: compassionate, strong and brave. And you? A tool, easily manipulated._

Images of the two of us playing a game of chess flashed through my mind, but when did this happen and why did I feel like my limbs were pinning the doll on their own volition, as if I had no control over what I was doing right now?

 

_Because you’re just another puppet. You’ve lost all bodily autonomy, and sold it to Zhenya. Do you really have any control over your body, or does he just want you to believe that you do?_

 

My odd thoughts about being controlled started to bother me once more, which I tried to shake off. Zhenya told me not to let anything get in the way of accomplishing something, just like in a video game. Focus on the task at hand was the most important thing. Shoma Uno went into first place, despite his mistakes, and Sasha Petrov took the ice. Now this one, I knew was standing in my way. I grabbed his doll without hesitating and closed my eyes. I had to focus, I couldn’t get distracted by stupid things. Something in my mind was compelling me to channel my energy, and I didn’t notice what elements I was pinning him on. My eyes were trained on the doll and the pins. It didn’t matter however, as it wasn’t as if I didn’t want to hex the boy, someone the Federation was going to throw all their support towards. I was going to show them that they couldn’t be relied on, that they were just going to end up like Artur.

 

_Help me… help me… help me…_

Sasha Petrov went into sixth place with a score of 206.23 points as I grabbed another muffin and tried to figure out whose voice kept echoing in my head, and why I felt unusually energetic. Zhenya said that I was supposed to feel tired after pinning four people for the first time.

 

But I didn’t feel tired. I felt _alive_. Powerful, like Zhenya told me.

 

 


	28. Requiem For A Man

_It’s time, Masha. It’s time._

Kostya and I were sitting on his sofa, watching the Spanish ice dance team perform their short dance. As much as I wanted to stop thinking about my life and choices, and just enjoy their program, I couldn’t bring myself to do so.

 

I knew that didn’t get the flu for natural reasons right before the short program at the Russian Cup Final. Someone had to have done something, and the only person who even knew that it existed was Rukavitsyn…. which meant he somehow found out about what I’d done.

 

_“You don’t want to end up like Makarova, don’t you, Masha?”_

“I won’t.” I answered to nobody in particular, as Ksenia Monko and Kirill Khaliavin took the ice. I wasn’t going to allow myself to fall. I was just going to lead him into thinking that he succeeded in breaking me, and mask my actual thoughts with lies as I continued my plan to save Kostya and Alenka and Gordei. I might not have Alenka’s acting skills, but at least I was in control of my own actions.

 

“Is everything alright, Masha?” Kostya asked as he passed me a small Russian flag. There was nothing concealed in his hands, and for a moment, I pretended that he'd seen the light and would stop pinning those infernal dolls, dolls that were just agents of corruption…but the presence of a couple of dolls on the coffee table tethered me to the harsh reality… that my Kostya wasn’t going to stop anytime soon.

 

“Everything’s fine, Kostya. You don’t have to keep worrying about me,” I replied, ruefully thinking about whom he ought to be most worried about - himself. I did not know whether they were the right words to say, however. “Do you have another one of these flags?” I continued, trying to clear the tension I felt, as Ksenia and Kirill went up into their rotational lift. I clapped as they managed to pull it off.

 

“Why would you need another one? I think we’re being patriotic enough,” he stated, as the music ended and they exited the ice. From the bit of their program I watched, they executed it relatively cleanly, so there was no magic afoot... hopefully.

 

“Wouldn’t it be better if both of us were indulging in some patriotism?” I quipped, hoping to lighten the mood a bit and distract him from the dolls, even though I didn’t see any reason for him to pin any of the dance teams.

 

“Heh, I guess you’re right. I’ll find the other one, and attempt to be patriotic while missing our third dance team,” Kostya answered, briefly kissing me before exiting the sofa. Alexandra Stepanova and Ivan Bukin took the ice right after, and I began to watch their short dance as a strange wave of calmness shot through my veins…

 

_Well, blame the endorphins. Besides, they’re perfectly clean and Kostya seems fine._

Sasha and Ivan were in the middle of their step sequence as I began waving the flag again…. only for her to fall for no reason and land on her knee. I couldn’t see any reason for her to do so, for the part of the sequence I’d seen before looked stable, and it wasn’t usual for someone to fall in a way that’d cause bleeding….

 

_Because this isn’t natural? Kostya, what the hell did you just do?!_

“Because it’s everywhere, this madness is obsequious and I have to cure it,” he answered from behind me, as if he’d read my mind and could hear my thoughts…. and I have to speed up my actions while hiding it all from him as well, I couldn’t let him fall any further…..

 

_Why don’t you test your theory? Kostya, why did you just cause Sasha Stepanova to fall in a manner that cut her knee open, caused their step sequence to lose points and levels, and caused them to go into fifth place, behind teams from Denmark and Slovakia?!_

_Why do you even think this is even remotely justified, Kostya? She has about as much to do with 2013 as I do! Why can’t you see that you’re just hurting people at random, while putting up a facade of helping us?!_

_Look at how far you’ve fallen! Is this really the man I chose to love?_

The team from Japan took the ice and began to skate, and all I could hear was their music.

_Okay, I know that you’re going to hear everything I think, Kostya, so let me ask you a few questions. Where’s your heart? Do you still have one, or has Rukavitsyn killed it, leaving you only with darkness?_

_I don’t want to declare you a lost cause, Kostya. I still love you… or do I? Maybe I’m loving a man who died two years ago, a man who was once my everything but gave up his happiness for success. Regardless of my feelings, I will do the right thing and save everyone. No matter what Rukavisityn does to me… I won’t fall._

_I hope the little bit of your personality that still exists hears me. Got it, Kostya?_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter recently got edited after I put it up. Sorry.


	29. The Subject of Revenge

_Kovtun closes out the last group of men in the short program, so you can determine exactly what to do to him by watching everyone else. Determine the quality of this event before doing anything reckless, and don’t pin anyone else before him. He’s your target, the cause of your suffering in the first place. Make him pay._

Yet Russia wasn’t the only nation with an obsession with youth, from what I could tell. One only had to look at Japan to prove that, where both the gold and silver medalists at their national championships were under twenty. Many were even clamoring for said silver medalist being sent to this competition over the older and more experienced men, even though there was always the valid point of nerves, and he arguably did play role in the retirement of Tatsuki Machida from what I could see…so, no matter what, I had to prevent Shoma Uno from succeeding.

 

Unfortunately, his doll wasn’t anywhere to be found, so I couldn’t injure him badly enough to force him to sit out the next season. However, I could force the rest of Team Japan to bomb, dropping their total number of slots to two, or perhaps even one. The latter would be too suspicious, due to Hanyu being the gold-medal favorite despite his extensive list of injuries…but the former did not seem too sketchy.

_Bravo, you genius. Don’t you think that if Japan ends up with fewer slots for next year and Hanyu retires due to your exacerbation of his injuries, Mura and Kozuka will end up being dropped. And as Machida’s completely retired, that leaves Japan with the world junior gold and bronze medalists of Shoma Uno and Sota Yamamoto?_

_Who’s going to worlds next year then, Kostya? A pair of men whose ages average out to sixteen, of course. Such a genius, aren’t you?_

There were always two possible outcomes to every choice, and they were clear to me in this case. There was always the chance that I would succeed, but there was also another possibility. Would my actions in preventing Uno’s rise only contribute to it instead? Would I just end up causing exactly what I’d hoped to prevent in my nation to occur in Japan? There were two sides to every coin, and did not want the coin to land on the wrong face.

 

_Give me love…._

The strain of music pulled me out of my thoughts, for the warmup was probably on right now. I mean, who the hell would choose to skate to Ed Sheeran? I looked towards the screen and saw that someone was actually skating to that music; a tall, elegant-looking man with brown hair in black. Right, him. Joshua Farris, who was the surprise American bronze and Four Continents silver medalist, yet who also was notoriously inconsistent. He was young, and he had to be eliminated. I picked up his doll from the table, pushing away my previous reservations about working on anyone else besides Maxim.

 

Joshua was setting up for a triple axel as I grabbed a pair of pins out of the canister and shoved them into his doll, forcing him to fall hard on his side. I kept my eyes on the screen, the possibility of him withdrawing very real, with the look on his face. However, he somehow picked himself up and continued his program.

_How?! Why the hell… alright, granted, this is the same boy who skated after being hospitalized for going into anaphylactic shock, with a torn hip flexor and a broken leg to boot four years ago thanks to his horrible coach, but still…_

_Who do you want to love you, Kostya? Do you want love or revenge? Would you choose madness over sanity, and lies over the truth? Zhenya over Masha?_

_But you have power and control in your hands. Never again would you be helpless and powerless in the face of those who dismiss you._

_Oh look, the doll’s broken. Shame that you destroyed it._

_What!?_

 

Farris was exiting the ice right now, and a third pin had mysteriously materialized on his doll… a pin which I might have unconsciously put in while contemplating my choices, but why did his doll even need it when the axel fall was clearly a big enough mistake to put a big dent in his short program score?

 

_Why did you agree to brainwash Alenka? Why did you need to make dolls of every single person that could even potentially become a threat?! Why did you even agree to Zhenya’s offer in 2013?! Why did you even expand your fucking revenge plot beyond Maxim! Those things weren’t necessary, Kostya! If Maxim was the problem, why did you not just involve him and nobody else?_

Except what was my life, outside revenge? Who was I, without this mess? It was revenge that took me this far, it helped me continue my career, despite the uncertainty the next season would inevitably bring.

_Calm down. Don’t panic. Everything’s alright. Just wait for Maxim to take the ice, and we’ll go from there._

Joshua Farris scored 73.52 points, much lower than his Four Continents score.  Nam Nguyen took the ice. Even though he was the Canadian National Champion, he’d finished outside of the top ten at the Four Continents Championships, and had issues of his own. Of course he wasn’t going to be a threat.

_Fuck, a triple axel._

_If he does the quad and lands it, he’s going to end up near the top if I don’t do anything._

I grabbed a pin and stuck it into his doll, but all it did was blur the edge on his triple lutz. I threw it down, realizing that Kozuka was up next. If I wanted to lessen the chances of Shoma Uno entering Worlds next year, I had to do what I had to do.

 

_What are your goals, Kostya? Have they blurred so much that all that’s left is revenge?_

Nam Nguyen scored 77.73 points and went into second place as Kozuka skated to the center of the rink and I picked up his doll, tossing it in the air twice. I just had to replicate what I did during the Universiade, where he’d failed to win the event and fell twice in his free skate.

 

Except this time, the target was the short program instead. One pin, a messed up quadruple toe loop, and then another...a fumbled triple axel. Nobody was going to suspect that it was caused by anything more than his shallow hip joint sockets. I then rammed two more pins at the same time, expelling more of my energy. He then fell on his triple lutz, which’d also prevent him from putting a combination in his program.

 

_So, that’s how that goes. Now, onto Mura and Kovtun…._

_Oh, isn’t is such a shame that the JSF is dropping a 26 year old? Even after all he did for them? Isn’t it such a shame, that Japan’s first Olympic Champion in men is going to retire after only five seasons on the senior level, because of injuries sustained during and after almost every competition? Isn’t it such a shame that the winner of Skate Canada and a Grand Prix Final competitor finished so low in the standings? Isn’t it such a shame that none of these men could preserve Japan’s three slots?_

_Well, look at who’s left. A pair of inconsistent men, and a pair of juniors._

_So, next season, isn’t there always possibility that the JSF will move Sota Yamamoto up to the senior level, and have him and Uno be the only men with two Grand Prix slots? Wouldn’t you then expect the pair of them to be sent to Worlds? Wouldn’t you expect them to win back three slots?_

_Wouldn’t your efforts be counterproductive, then? Genius indeed._

 

_Wait, what?! Why would I let that happen?! Why would I let the JSF turn into my Federation?!_

 

_The road to hell is paved with good intentions, Kostya._

 

_You would do anything for the slim chance that Shoma Uno would be prevented from competing at Worlds next year. The ends justify the means, you say. Well, do you know who says that too? That’s right, serial killers. They believe that their duty is to revolutionize the world, and it’s perfectly okay to kill everyone to do so._

 

_Do you honestly think you’re any better than one?_

 

_Wait, what the fuck?! How did this even get here? No one's died because of me!_

 

_Okay, let’s try something else. How about dictators? They believe, that for their utopian visions, that taking total control are entirely justifiable._

 

_You wanted to be a hero, you say? Well, what exactly makes a hero now?_

The opening notes of Bolero snapped me out of the voices in my head. Maxim Kovtun had started his program, and he had to fail, as planned. He jumped, and I leaned forward to swipe his doll from the table, almost knocking another one that was covered in pins...

 

_Wait, when did I do that? Who exactly is that a doll of?_

Kovtun had landed his combination as I reached for the pin canister in the midst of my table. I took out three pins and summoned up all the energy I could muster. I forced the implements into the doll’s body as he was setting up for his quadruple toeloop…he turned twice in the air before landing, popping the intended jump into a double and completely negating its value. I took out another pair of pins and stuck them into the doll’s head, as he set up for an intended triple axel. One and a half times he turned, before he landed once more, the axel a single rather than a triple. I should’ve stopped there, but I knew better. Somehow, he capable of garnering rather high component scores even when his jumps failed him, so I kept going on, ignoring the increasing heaviness I felt in my head, arms and body as I did.

 

_Bomb. Bomb. Please, would you bomb, so they realize exactly how stupid their choice in 2013 was?_

_Trust me, I’m doing this for you. The world doesn’t need more egotistical, arrogant children running around._

Maxim Kovtun went into 16th place with 70.82 points as my eyes began to close, the last things they saw being the table and the dolls filled with pins…..

 

 


	30. Prince of Darkness

An array of dolls sat on my table, filling up every square centimeter of the glass. The men’s free skate at the World Championships was about to begin, and I was going to pin every single man there. 

 

Zhenya’d told me to only pin a few of them, but why would I do just that? Why would I waste the tools that have been given to me to help me succeed? Besides, the more men who fall, the easier it would be for me to get out of the country, plus it would help me in my little quest to detach Masha from Kostya.

 

_ “Help me…if he ever tells you to follow him, don’t listen to him…”  _

 

_ Huh? When did I ever converse with Masha in a hotel room? Why would she be telling me to...  Right, I’m just nervous about pinning twenty-four people. Kostya couldn’t handle that. He’s weak and ineffectual. Now, is the oven warm enough yet? _

 

Thankfully, the my oven’s buzzer went off the second the warm-up group left the ice. Quickly, I took out the baking sheet and transferred the cookies - peppermint chocolate - onto a plate, and placed the second baking sheet I prepared inside, setting the knobs and the timer once more. Carrying it back to the couch, I noticed that Takahiko Kozuka’s music had begun. I set the plate beside me and grabbed a dark-haired doll in a blue shirt. As per Zhenya’s advice, I had to prevent both him and Takahito Mura from moving up in the short program. It would make my path easier if Japan slid in the rankings and ended up with fewer slots. As he set up for a quadruple toeloop, I jabbed his doll with a pin, and he fumbled it. His second jump was a quadruple toeloop-double toeloop combination, and I forced him to err on that as well. I could’ve hexed him on his triple axel, but I knew better than to waste my energy and my chance to prove to Zhenya and Masha that I was better, so much better, than Kostya Menshov…

 

_ Do you ever feel like parts of your life don’t add up? That you’re missing a piece, just a single piece in the puzzle of your life?  _

 

Why was I suddenly brooding? Brooding was a waste of time, one suited for the likes of wimps and weak-willed men, not for one with power and control like myself. I’d lost my place in Kozuka’s program, but just to be safe, I grabbed his doll and stuffed a pin into it, hoping that it would cause him to lose points. 

 

_ Isn’t this wrong? Nah, Zhenya knows best. I don’t have any qualms over this, but it’s technically… _

 

_ Damn this, of course Zhenya is the last person who’d harm me! _

 

Takahito Mura had just landed a triple lutz-triple toeloop combination, and I couldn’t let him leapfrog Kozuka in the standings and net Japan three slots for next year…I couldn’t let the International Skating Federation pass on me again for the Grand Prix next season. I tossed his doll up in the air once, caught it and laid it on my lap, shoving a pin into its knee. He popped his triple axel, yet I knew that I needed to do a lot more to feel secure. He was in the middle of his steps however, and I didn’t want to waste any energy on something that was less important that jumps.

 

_ You just let him land a triple loop and a triple axel-double toeloop, you idiot! Do you want to get on the Grand Prix? Push yourself up in the Season’s Best standings? PIN HIM!  _

 

And then somehow, the man on the screen morphed into Artur Gachinski…the very man I had to eliminate so that I could take his place. I had to stop him, had to make the Federation realize that his medal in 2011 was a complete and total fluke, that he never should’ve gotten out of the country in the past three years. Artur wasn’t just a horrible competitor, but a wimp and disgusting for leaving Mishin without informing him, so whatever the hell I was about to do is justified, whether I was ripping the doll in my hands into shreds or not. After all, if I’m bad, Artur is definitely worse - skating or otherwise.

 

The chime of the oven’s timer distracted me from the TV screen, and I got up as someone in white started skating to familiar-sounding violin music. Chances were, he was going to mess up on his own anyway, like most of the others. 

 

I stuffed oven mitts onto my hands and extracted the cookies from the oven as my world returned to normal. I just hated hearing the voices inside my head...but of course, it was a small price to pay for the power I had in my hands, and only the weak would give up because of  _ that _ . I pricked a fork into each of the cookies, checking to see if they were done all the way. Their minty aroma wafted into my nose, and for a few moments, I drifted off into a rare reverie. Here I was, just a guy who wanted Masha to notice me, and who wanted to make it on the international stage, someone who just wanted the recognition he deserved. For all my life, I worked hard on my consistency, and even though I had my naysayers just because I did not have a quadruple jump, it did not mean that I wasn’t capable of it. If only they knew about how I was training my own quadruple loop, if only they knew that reliability was sometimes a more important thing than a quadruple jump in a program. There was Artur on one end, and I on the other. Time and time again, I knew I’ve proved myself, only to be passed over just because of the Federation’s  _ precious little Artur _ . Hell, even Sergei Voronov was a problem that I had to eliminate, and  _ would have  _ been long gone if Alenka and Masha were so adamant about refusing to exercise their powers over him.

 

But then again, Alenka wasn’t here, so of course, I had free rein over whomever I choose to pin, and nobody was around to stop me, or think that they could talk some sense into me. “Sense” indeed. Anyway, what could she do if the deed has been done? Nothing. And if this would teach her to stop letting her emotions rule her and make her cease in resisting Zhenya, who knew what was best for all of us, then so be it. 

 

I took my time to fill my stomach, knowing well enough that I needed to eat and recover more of my strength for what was to come next. Joshua Farris was of little importance to me - lower in rank than Jason Brown and injury-prone. I would much rather save my strength for what I knew was more crucial to my success - the downfall of Maxim and Sergei.

 

The announcement of Maxim’s name prompted me to get up and return to the couch. Joshua had gone into first place, though with a score that could easily be buried.  The music began, and I was trying to prevent myself from falling asleep from boredom. Sue me, but working with Olga for a while at least gave me some semblance of taste. but he woke me up when he landed a quadruple salchow. As he had two other quads planned in this program, I couldn’t let him land them and move up in the standings, so I forced him to fall on his quadruple toeloop…. but he landed his second quadruple salchow before I could pin the doll again, so I just had to wait…. wait and hope he’d err on all of his non-jump elements as I gathered up all my energy so I could force him into failing…. 

 

_ “.....hello? Can you hear me?”  _

 

“What?! Who are you?!” I exclaimed out loud, dropping the doll on the table as it landed on a pin. The room was still completely empty, so I had to have heard something in my head, but I was perfectly sane, wasn’t I? 

 

_ “....a friend, shall we say? Let’s just say that I’m someone you’ve forgotten about…. someone, you met in a dream, perhaps?”  _

 

_ WHAT?! Are you real?! I didn’t make up some random person to justify that I’m hearing voices in my head, right?! I’m perfectly sane! _

 

_ “.....nevermind….. I’ll be with you soon. Gordei, I have to tell you something.”  _

 

There was a man on the ice, and it was probably Maxim…so I picked up a doll, not knowing or caring who it was of, and began shoving pins into it, for the Federation had to notice that there were actual good people they could support, or at least, people who weren’t outwardly racist jerks with poor sportsmanship. He’ll make a mess and we’d be down to one spot. The Federation would end up blaming him and dropping him, and then, I could move on to Sergei and force him to mess up as well. Kostya...it would only be a matter of time before he retires. The old man is virtually the same age as Plushenko after all. Of course, with them out of the way, it would be the juniors’ turn. I’ll never be ignored then, I would create my own future and people would love me, such as-

 

_ …no, she wouldn’t. She doesn’t love you. You had a chance of friendship before you did all this, and you threw it all down the drain.  _

 

_ Wait, what? Doesn’t she think I’m still her crazy stalker? When did we ever….. _

 

_ It never happened. Zhenya said it didn’t, remember?  _

 

The only thing the screen provided to distract me from myself was the Zamboni. Its low hum and measured movements were strangely hypnotic, and reminded me of the mind and body of a man being brainwashed into becoming a mindless puppet, forced to throw away all of his personality to chase a nonexistent dream. I spared a thought for myself. Was I  _ really  _ in control, or am I just another pawn in his game of chess? 

 

Zhenya was training me as his successor, his Black Prince, and I couldn’t let lies and disturbing thoughts distract me. How disappointed would he be in me if I’d completely failed in my goal? Him turning to me when Kostya was his oldest student had to mean something...like he saw potential in me, or believed that I could be as powerful as him. Unlike Kostya, I wasn’t going to let any stupid emotions or thoughts get in my way. 

 

The names of the skaters in the next group flashed onscreen, and I glanced at each of their names. Among them, three weren’t even European, so I probably shouldn’t be so concerned about them. Florent Amodio? Mistake-prone, nervous, lazy, and very likely to ruin his chances on his own. Michal Brezina, dubbed the most handsome current senior skater by most female fans, was an even worse case than the French frog, so he wasn’t my problem either. And of course, I could always count on Alexei Bychenko to mess up...which of course leaves the others. I supposed that I could use this group as a time for me to recover...

 

_ You’re the Black Prince, not just a mere pawn!  _

 

No, I wasn’t going to be complacent. I had to fight battles to become stronger. I mentally ran through the names of the next group, trying to figure out whom I had to take care of. 

 

_ Alright, Michal and Alexei it is. I couldn’t be too optimistic about things going my way when it comes to those two. I’ll see about Florent later. _

 

I yawned, before leaning back and bouncing both my chosen dolls on my hands. Nam Nguyen wasn’t going to be winning medals anytime soon. As I watched, however, I noticed that he was executing his program cleanly, quadruple toe included. I had to keep an eye on him next season. One quad wasn’t going to give him that much of a scoring advantage, and dirtying his programs would perhaps, give me the chance to catch up if ever I had to face him head-to-head in the future. He went into first place by fifteen points...a dangerous thing. I was wrong in dismissing him as a non-threat, and the next time I was going to see him, I wasn’t going to let him off that easily. Now it was Michal’s turn, and I set aside Alexei’s doll, giving the suited man on the screen, the so-called “Prince Charming”, a hard glare. Oh, he was going  _ down _ .

 

I let him land a triple axel to lull him into a sense of false security. After all, a complacent mind was an easy mind to influence. He skated on, seemingly unaware of what was to come next. I had read his planned content online, however, and as I watched his face relax, I shoved a pin into his doll, . He then went into a quadruple salchow-double toeloop combination, but I made him err on that, as well as forced him into popping his second quadruple salchow. Then, he attempted a triple axel-triple toeloop combination, but I made him pop the second jump, which completely negated its value. I could stop now, but I didn’t want to. He’d just executed a clean triple lutz, so I forced him to err on the following triple loop and double both jumps in his triple flip-triple salchow sequence. 

 

I’d never felt so energetic before, so  _ alive.  _ Why couldn’t I have pinned all of the men before him? 

 

_ Because you’re an addict? And addicted to power? Certainly explains the videogames….. _

 

My thoughts were superfluous. Michal Brezina scored 213.83 points and went into seventh place as Alexei Bychenko took the ice. I grabbed his doll as the music began, and he set up for a triple axel, which I forced him to err on. Unfortunately, his next jumping pass was a clean quadruple toeloop, so I impulsively shoved a pin into the doll on his next one, but all it did was blur the edge on his triple lutz….

 

_ Okay, he’s spinning now, so you can gather up your energy for the rest of his program.  _

 

Thankfully, the second half of the program went much better for me than the first, for I was able to make him fall on his triple axel, err on every single jump in the program sans his triple loop, pop the double toeloop in his triple lutz-double toeloop combination, and get low levels on his spins. He scored 209.26 points and went into eighth place as I picked up Amodio’s doll….

 

_ “.....a storm is brewing. Your enemy is approaching, and you must eliminate him, Gordei….”  _

 

Why could I hear Zhenya’s voice in my head? Who did he want me to eliminate, for the only person I could think about that’d fit under this umbrella was Gachinski, who wasn’t competing here despite my weird hallucination of him earlier…. but if I were to hallucinate his target as Gachinski, it’d be easier for me to pin him, regardless of the toll on my mind…. 

 

_ Are you sure?! Are you sure that regularly hallucinating him isn’t going to fuck up your life?!  _

 

_ Yes, I’m fine. Why would Zhenya want to harm me? If he wants me to succeed him, he’d want me to remain in one piece both physically and mentally.  _

 

_ Anyways, let’s just push those thoughts out of your mind, and go do something else.. Don’t pin the next three guys, and just relax for a bit. Just forget everything, and let yourself relax, okay?  _

 

I got off the sofa and began walking towards my oven, but my head felt like it was about to explode and I needed to lie down…. the world was growing whiter and whiter for some reason, so the pins did affect my physical state, but I just had to eliminate Zhenya’s target and nothing else mattered…. 

 

_ Who’s on the ice now? So, Kovtun’s most likely going to be dropped, Kostya’s going to retire, and the juniors all bombed…. leaving a space open for me.  _

 

_ Right? That’s everyone? I think?  _

 

But Gachinski was on the ice right now, and I had to eliminate him. I grabbed the nearest doll as my blood began to stain it, shoving a pin into it as he doubled his opening quadruple toeloop. I let him land his next combination, but a second pin went into his doll as he performed a triple toeloop-double toeloop combination. I let him successfully execute a triple lutz and a flying camel spin, only to pin him on both the following step sequence and axel. The fifth pin went into the doll right after his triple salchow, forcing him to perform an invalid triple loop-double toeloop-double loop combination. A sixth pin was about to go into the doll on his final axel, but my head fell into my hands as someone walked into my apartment…. but why would anyone want to see me? 

 

“.....I’m going to help you, Gordei. Don’t worry, I’ll save you…..” she said, grabbing me with her soft hands as she began to call someone. I’d just let her find out about this world, but why did she act like she was used to this? Why was she so calm? 

 

_ Why did I let myself fail her?  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it took so long to finish editing this chapter. We'll try to speed up our update rate...


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